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AIBU?

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Should I complain about this nurse

239 replies

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:38

or just let it go?

My very vulnerable, very elderly neighbour fell in his house recently and was treated in his home by paramedics.

Today as I was rushing out to an appointment a district nurse approached me and said that she was there to visit my neighbour but he wasn't in/ This really alarmed me due to his vulnerabilities and physical state. I asked if she'd looked in all the rooms and she said she had. I got her phone number to contact her after my appt.

On my return an hour later I came across her again. She told me that she had returned to see if my neighbour had returned home.

He'd never been out. He was sleeping in bed. She lied. She hadn't looked in every room. He could have been dead for all she knew.7

I'm so annoyed at her lying. So unprofessional. AIBU to report her.

OP posts:
MissJeanBrodiesmother · 21/03/2025 17:20

I think you have a bit of a cheek to be quizzing anyone really.

Jeschara · 21/03/2025 17:20

Look at the username, this is either a wind up or the OP suits the second part of the user name.

Jeschara · 21/03/2025 17:18

NorthernGirl1981 · 21/03/2025 16:58

I’m speechless.

Poor nurse.

Me too, you are looking to get someone into trouble OP, the nurse went back, you do not know the circumstances and the poor nurse does not owe you a explanation.

TheIceBear · 21/03/2025 17:18

Sorry but there is something about your story that doesn’t add up. No nurse would deliberately avoid trying to find a client in their home then return and pretend not to find them again an hour later. It just doesn’t make sense. And frankly you sound a bit unhinged.

lnks · 21/03/2025 17:14

She made a mistake like humans sometimes do.

VickyEadieofThigh · 21/03/2025 17:13

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 17:12

She told me she would come back after she had visited someone else in the area - to "see if he returned".

And she did. What's your point?

LemonPeonies · 21/03/2025 17:12

Tbh OP, it sounds like you need to get yourself a hobby.

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 17:12

She told me she would come back after she had visited someone else in the area - to "see if he returned".

OP posts:
JasonTindallsTan · 21/03/2025 17:11

333FionaG · 21/03/2025 16:46

From a safeguarding perspective, she certainly wasn't looking out for this vulnerable gentleman, if she hadn't physically checked whether he was in or not. Was she definitely a registered nurse? The NMC would be interested, I think.

Oh for goodness sake. Of course the NMC wouldn’t be remotely interested. This nurse evidently knocked on the door, rang the bell and looked in the various available window and couldn’t see the chap. She then got accosted by a busybody and gave her a diluted version of the above and came back in an hour to follow up. What exactly do you think the regulator would care about?

A key safe means naff all unless you know the code and if she’s going to go to the trouble of coming back in an hours time, thus doubling her workload for this particular patient, if she had proper access don’t you think she might have, I don’t know, used it?!

OP you have absolutely no idea if this nurse had proper access to the house, back off and beak out.

ArtTheClownIsNotAMime · 21/03/2025 17:05

If she was skiving why would she come back an hour later?

Mareleine · 21/03/2025 17:02

OP's username is interesting.

VickyEadieofThigh · 21/03/2025 16:58

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:56

She didn't check with neighbours. She was about to drive off as I left for my appt. I asked her how my neighbour was... and YES all his carers have access to his keysafe. She has access to his keysafe. It's on all his notes in hospital/care agency/social work dept.

How on earth do you know such sensitive information about your neighbour?

TwinklyRoseTurtle · 21/03/2025 16:58

Just so you know for future reference- the hospital, care agency and social workers and district nurses all use different online systems and don’t automatically have access to the keysafe number unless specifically given to that dept don’t assume it’s passed around as that’s breach off GDPR.

NorthernGirl1981 · 21/03/2025 16:58

I’m speechless.

Poor nurse.

BeaTwix · 21/03/2025 16:57

Your faith in joined up care is touching.

i’m regularly phoned for the key safe number of the elderly person I support as even the same organisation cannot make sure all their staff have it.

Let alone expecting Social care to pass it to NHS staff!!

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:56

TwinklyRoseTurtle · 21/03/2025 16:54

You’re wrong and can’t presume this. Doesn’t mean every agency involved has the keysafe number, she appeared to have not been able to get in touch with the patient, she checked with the neighbours and returned within an hour- seems to me she acted appropriately and with concern

She didn't check with neighbours. She was about to drive off as I left for my appt. I asked her how my neighbour was... and YES all his carers have access to his keysafe. She has access to his keysafe. It's on all his notes in hospital/care agency/social work dept.

OP posts:
Lyricalunite · 21/03/2025 16:55

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:54

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

She wouldn't have had to return if she'd done her job properly the first time and not been dishonest about it.

OP posts:
TwinklyRoseTurtle · 21/03/2025 16:54

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:51

Of course she'd been given the key safe code. It's the only way that anyone can get in to his house. He takes about 5 minutes to make his way to the door so social care have allowed anyone who has anything to do with his care access to the key safe.

You’re wrong and can’t presume this. Doesn’t mean every agency involved has the keysafe number, she appeared to have not been able to get in touch with the patient, she checked with the neighbours and returned within an hour- seems to me she acted appropriately and with concern

VickyEadieofThigh · 21/03/2025 16:54

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:51

Of course she'd been given the key safe code. It's the only way that anyone can get in to his house. He takes about 5 minutes to make his way to the door so social care have allowed anyone who has anything to do with his care access to the key safe.

There's no "of course" about it because you cannot know social services have actually had contact with this nurse.

Bearbookagainandagain · 21/03/2025 16:54

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:52

She lied because when I saw her the second time she was flustered and said "oh I didn't know where the rooms were...I shouted and no one answered"

He lives in a townhouse and she had not gone upstairs to his bedroom.

But you're not her boss. She doesn't owe you anything, even the truth. She went back, that's what matters.

AprilF00L · 21/03/2025 16:52

Bearbookagainandagain · 21/03/2025 16:50

Why do you say she lied?
She could have checked (not well enough maybe) and not seen him.
I would think that the fact that she went back soon after is more to her credit.

She lied because when I saw her the second time she was flustered and said "oh I didn't know where the rooms were...I shouted and no one answered"

He lives in a townhouse and she had not gone upstairs to his bedroom.

OP posts:
Offtobuttonmoontovisitmrspoon · 21/03/2025 16:52

I asked if she'd looked in all the rooms and she said she had

I would speak to someone about it rather than complain as you don’t know exactly what happened.

JLou08 · 21/03/2025 16:52

It actually sounds like she went above and beyond to locate him by talking to you and then coming back. I think it's very unreasonable that you are considering making a complaint.

528htz · 21/03/2025 16:52

She probably went away to contact someone for the key safe number and visited another patient in the meantime.