Who should go to A&E with child - mum or dad?

I don't get why dad didn't the child sooner, but waited an entire day with a child in agony, as you say.

Dad because he's been with the child all day and will be able to fully answer questions.

You are unreasonable to assume there's one right answer and unkind in presuming your husband picked whatever he picked out of laziness (Velcro baby vs A&E long queues).

i do agree that dads seem to have a different experience in hospital settings.

the one time I’ve taken my child… I honestly can’t put my finger on it but felt really judged about being a single mum. And this isn’t me imagining it because I’m not a single mum - they had made an assumption based on I kept correcting them over dcs surname which is different to mine as I hadn’t changed it when i got married. As soon as mentioned a husband the attitude changed. Maybe people will think I imagined it but I really felt that way!

What a daft question.

What would it matter ?
Why is it playing on your mind so much ?
Who are they to you ?

I'd say there was a bit more logic in Dad taking him as he is the one who has been with him during the day so will be able to answer questions about symptoms and any tried treatments more accurately, but there is absolutely no "should" about it.

Mum

Sadly, Dad.

It's the only way to avoid 'Oh, you're just anxious, have you had help from your GP for that?'.

I would probably prioritise the unwell child in this situation and send whoever they are asking for. Dad would have to suck it up. Hope your little one is ok.

Dad has been with the child all day so will have better knowledge of the symptoms/sequence of events than mum who hasn’t been there all day.

Dad’s been home with him all day and therefore can give a better report of symptoms.

As long as one of you goes with him surely it doesn't matter?

Doesn't really matter, although I'd say that dad should have taken him sooner and mum either swapped with him and he then took baby home, or mum stops by and picks up baby.

When mine were little dh took dd2 a few times when ds was a baby. When I didn't have a baby to feed then I normally took them, but that's because I was at home.

The parent who is best suited to advocate for the child - the one who would say 'no, it is not normal for him to feel this way', 'no, I want a blood test, this is not just 'probably viral'. Basically, the one who is not going to be in awe of the personnel there.

Absolutely no should about it. Which ever works best in any given situation.

I'd err slightly towards Dad as he's seen the symptoms all day so can better answer questions on pain levels, toileting, what he's had to eat and drink. But you can argue it either which way, there is no right or wrong answer.

I have two children with ongoing health issues and this is not my experience at all.

With our family dh is really good at not panicking in an emergency but I am much better than him at the waiting around bits when the crisis is over. So dh takes them to a and e and then we swap when the dc is on the children's ward. I also do the elective surgeries.

Dad, given he has been observing him all day so presumably better placed to fully answer questions

Whoever is best placed that day to do it. Sounds like dad for this one as he’s been with him all day, and therefore maybe best placed to answer questions. Sometimes that element wont be relevant eg if both parents saw a child fall and hurt themselves.

We’ve been to A&E a few times with DC, and for us it’s always a logistical question. DH can’t drive due to a disability, so if it’s day time and parking will be an issue, I’ll drive and drop him and DC off. If it’s nighttime, I’ll just drive unwell DC because it’s easier to park and means we can easily come home whenever.

Which parent is better at retaining information during stressful situations?

I got my DH to do A & E with 4 year old when I was breastfeeding a baby. The 4 year old would have preferred me, but I couldn't be in two places, and didn't want to take baby along.

Let’s be honest, it doesn’t matter. What matters is the poorly child getting the medical attention they need in a timely manner. There’s literally no right or wrong answer to this.

What a ridiculous post, there is no “should”. Mums don’t love their kids more than dads, they aren’t the only ones who can take them to A&E.

Whoever will be most effective at getting sick child evaluated and treated.

So who knows the symptoms better
Who is better at staying calm in a medical setting
Who is better at keeping DC calm if a long wait or blood tests are needed
Who is better at talking concisely, asking relevant questions and remembering information related to treatment going forward when dealing with medical professionals and in a medical setting

Some people are awesome at this and some people are dreadful at it.

It depends of course on the situation. My husband is better at the hospital and stressful situations, because I freak and have anxiety. But he is TOO relaxed and never will take the dc initially. For example I knew ds needed to go to the hospital from what the GP said. DH thought wait and see until morning. I ignored and took son to hospital. Turns out, I was right, son admitted right away and once they said he would stay the night, I called dh to come to hospital. He took over and I went home to our other dc. DH spent the next 48 hours in the hospital with son and I went a few hours during the day. The reason was, dh is calm and would keep ds calm and it would be better for ds. I would freak and be too anxious.