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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

It’s goodbye from me

439 replies

solongandthxforthefish · 19/03/2025 17:54

I’ve been on mumsnet since the early days, it’s seen my family grow up and become adults, seen me become a grandparent.

its been a happy place, a supportive place through thick and thin and I’ve made lots of contacts who I will miss.

the supportive threads are being lost amongst ones of hatred and intolerance for difference, for the others and by threads about high incomes not being enough, of how disabled people are increasingly hated, how children with SEND are an inconvenience. Boomers, of which I am not one, are hated.

is there anybody mumsnet members actually like?

im taking a break, however long is needed until the hatred is less.

OP posts:
Zippidydoodah · 19/03/2025 18:41

Byeeeeeeee 👋

offmynut · 19/03/2025 18:39

Leafy74 · 19/03/2025 18:30

The standard of spelling has gone down too!

Show quote history

Thank you let me correct it bye bye.
Im battling a migraine today so everything i post will be off.

Funnywonder · 19/03/2025 18:38

Sometimes I want to delete Mumsnet and bugger off forever. The threads about ADHD and benefits can be particularly brutal and are stressful to read. But I stay the for Wordle. Lovely wee thread. Everyone just checks in with their Wordle score and congratulates the two’s😆😆 So peaceful.

AstroZomb1e · 19/03/2025 18:36

On another note if anyone uses the horrendously smug phrase ‘This isn’t an airport…’ I will tear my own hair out.

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 19/03/2025 18:33

@solongandthxforthefish Landlords!! you forgot to mention landlords! they are the scourge of the earth according to mn members!!

Leafy74 · 19/03/2025 18:30

offmynut · 19/03/2025 18:12

By by.

The standard of spelling has gone down too!

jellyfishperiwinkle · 19/03/2025 18:26

You could just try blocking AIBU and some other contentious boards.

SpidersAreShitheads · 19/03/2025 18:26

I would say the changes in MN reflect the changes in society.

There's been a definite shift to the right, and far less appetite to support others with different needs. Far less willingness to provide space for people who are different.

Society as a whole is less tolerant, less kind, and less willing to believe that others are genuinely doing their best. So many people are over-focussed on the fact that someone else might be getting more than them, even when they're doing perfectly well themselves. It's me, me, me.

There are still plenty of kind, lovely people out there, particularly women. But I don't think you're wrong to say that there's certainly a loud proportion that tend to drown the nice folk out at times.

As far as MN goes, some threads tend to attract them more than others. I've seen plenty of really supportive threads still going up every day. It's usually easy to spot the ones that are going to attract the arseholes, as certain topics gives them an opportunity to punch down and discuss others who they consider to be less.

I find it just better to swerve them because otherwise I start to genuinely feel overwhelmed at what people really think. I made the mistake of venturing onto a couple of threads this week and felt utterly despondent at what people were repeating as "fact", and the opinions they held.

If you do take a break OP, I wish you well. Social media in any form can be draining at times and it can be good to step away sometimes.

Chuchoter · 19/03/2025 18:23

Thank you ever so much for letting us know that you're leaving instead of just ghosting us.

Surfshoe · 19/03/2025 18:21

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Charlize43 · 19/03/2025 18:21

You will miss all the viciousness; all the man-hating threads; all those financially struggling on 100K a year; MILs being torn apart; and the bad fashion choices.

I give it an hour or so, and then you'll name change and be back!

ThejoyofNC · 19/03/2025 18:20

WhereIsMyJumper · 19/03/2025 18:12

I doubt anyone cares OP.

On a side note, I frequently see posts referred to as ‘full of hatred’ on here when they’re nothing of the sort. Usually just an alternative view point.

I have also seen multiple posts deleted for ‘breaking talk guidelines’ when they don’t. It’s just that sometimes, people don’t like reading things they disagree with and so hit the report button and I am not convinced MNHQ read them before deleting

Absolutely.

And the people who go ballistic and scream ableism because posters dare to say that having a disability doesn't make it okay to violently assault someone.

Mydogisamassivetwat · 19/03/2025 18:19

Fuck me, I’ve been here since I was 6 weeks pregnant with my 23 year old (under a million different sign ups as I’ve forgotten passwords and given up and re registered more times than I care to admit).

Do you not remember the days of COD where you would get jumped on for anything? It was one big clique back then. Way worse IMO.

HelenWheels · 19/03/2025 18:16

the answer is 42

HelenWheels · 19/03/2025 18:16

take a break op
for your mental health

ProustianMadeleine · 19/03/2025 18:16

There's no need to announce a flounce dear. MN hasn't changed that much in the 18 years I've been around.

MidnightMillie · 19/03/2025 18:15

Oh dear OP, you do make me laugh!

You've name changed to leave a chat forum? 🤭

One can only assume you'll be staying right where you are.

offmynut · 19/03/2025 18:12

By by.

WhereIsMyJumper · 19/03/2025 18:12

I doubt anyone cares OP.

On a side note, I frequently see posts referred to as ‘full of hatred’ on here when they’re nothing of the sort. Usually just an alternative view point.

I have also seen multiple posts deleted for ‘breaking talk guidelines’ when they don’t. It’s just that sometimes, people don’t like reading things they disagree with and so hit the report button and I am not convinced MNHQ read them before deleting

Surfshoe · 19/03/2025 18:09

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

PrettayGood · 19/03/2025 18:07

There used to be a Flouncer’s Corner. Does it still exist?

Anyway, as a nod to it, I’ll say what used always to be said, ‘don’t let the door hit you on your way out’ 😬.

verysmellyjelly · 19/03/2025 18:06

I’m disabled and I want people to be able to talk about the topic freely. I don’t think it helps us to try and quell discussion with nudges like this, OP.

ThePurpleBuffalo · 19/03/2025 18:05

MN is really stressing me out today. The ableism is through the fucking roof. It's exhausting to read.

ThejoyofNC · 19/03/2025 18:05

Isn't there a designated flouncers corner?