What is your household income, how much is benefits, and how are you coping?

My income is £800 each month from UC. I am not coping and it sounds like I will be expected to cope on even less.

The post wasn’t about one family. I said if the nanny was minding all 9 children, who were across 3 families it wouldn’t be a legal nanny set up.

Ours is about £150k per annum - all from wages. 2 adults and 1DC late teens (who’s working but we still financially support them).

We overpay the mortgage aiming to get rid of it quickly but manage to save about £1k per month as well.

Nursery years are the hard ones op - make sure you have a plan to put that money to good use (eg pensions or overpaying the mortgage) as it’s easy to just spend it and increase your standard of living.

Incorrect. If it’s one family still a nanny and no legal limit on the number.

Most of them do have their own businesses. We employed a young plumber recently, he's doing very nicely on what he was charging I can assure you. To my mind there's no point (from an earnings point of view) in going to uni unless you are heading for a well paid career like finance or tech.

incorrect. There is no legal limit on the number of children a nanny can look after.

Don't know why you're getting a hard time OP. Housing costs are outrageous, that's why a 90k household salary feels tight. Plus childcare for a few years and I can totally see why you don't feel flush.

How are people’s food shopping bills so low?! I’m feeding me, DP and DD. I cook from scratch and don’t use jarred sauces etc. I do buy organic fruit and veg, and free range meat etc but it’s not THAT much more expensive. Yet people here are spending £300 a month – that does us a fortnight, if that!

66k between us and then £102 a month CB.
About 4300

Rent and bills are £1225
Food shopping for 3 - around 250-300 a month
Petrol - about 180 for both cars, partner works 3.5 miles away but office based and I work hybrid about 11miles away 3x a week
Extra curricular for DD 100 a month
Car loan - both cars around 300
Gym for me - 27.50
Adhoc bills for DP.

I would say around 2000 disposable income between us.
I have just paid off my credit card so no debt ( other than car ) for me and dp has some debt however he pays it out of his 1000 disposable plus savings.

Live a comfortable life

90k is a good sum to support a family. ONE family. The trouble is, these days, it has to contribute to two families as many men, having left one wife and child/ren, decide they want a second family (often second wife’s first) but lo and behold the money doesn’t stretch.

I can’t help thinking that divorce and second homes and families is a big reason why decent incomes don’t feel how they ‘should’.

Guaranteed pension income between us is 35k PA retired but too young to claim state pension yet. DH does some freelance work as well so hard to quantify, a month a year and around 5k, guaranteed interest 5k, zero mortgage. Investments vary, last year we made just over 40k which was better than usual. Zero benefits.

The OP doesn’t pay 1.5k at nursery though so it doesn’t matter if your friend did?

“Where do you get £800 from? Try £1500 per child.”

She can’t save on her £1k nursery bill by employing a full time nanny.

Are you a rock in a wig?? You’re just repeating random tidbits not relevant to what the OP has posted.

@Gabrilla

I know how disheartening it must feel to be in this situation where it feels like work is not being rewarded.

I genuinely think that the root cause of a lot of our financial stress is broken housing.

Housing costs are eating up so much of our income - working as well as middle class incomes. We have far less disposable income than our EU neighbours and as a result there is less consumption, the economy shrinks, new jobs are not created etc. Housing is creating a huge burden on the economy as a whole.

Only when we make housing affordable again, i.e. <25% of the median single income then can the economy actually start developing again.

This was similar situation in just before the WWI in 1913, but even then housing was more affordable as porportion of median income. It took WWII to start the council housing building trend that bought house prices down and provided affordable accomodation to most people.

We need to build more houses and the government needs to lead the way on this. Only by building more council housing, can it drive developers to compete and build more private housing to sell for cheaper. Right now developers have us in a noose and we have to pay what they want or we have no roof over our heads.

If the government can make head away into solving the housing crisis it will also solve a lot of the cost of living crisis.

£1500 at nursery! I beg you to brush up on your reading skills. It’s quite embarrassing.

Exactly, I said you can’t employ a nanny for less than £1k a month. It would be considerably more.

I’m not the one arguing you can save money on a £1k full time nursery bill by hiring a nanny!

This is such an ill informed opinion. No one capable of working is better off financially not doing so.

Where do you get £800 from? Try £1500 per child.

It is usually a specific mix of things that make for a high benefit award though and not just for low pay. Multiple children especially with disabilities, renting in an expensive areas etc.

I can’t be bothered to type out for the third time what I originally said. Your comprehension skills are shocking!

When discussing ONE child in nursery. The poster suggested OP get a nanny, which quite obviously would not cost less than £1k a month!
You clearly can’t pay a nanny under £1k for full time.

What your random friends pay isn’t relevant because you can’t employ someone for £800 for full time work.

£5070 a month. Including £170 CB.
bills inc mortgage are £2200. We save £400 a month.
the rest we do as we please. But everything’s going up this month.

It’s relevant because YOU said it was laughable to suggest a NANNY to save money on childcare. I said I have friends who employ a nanny and do save money (even when their older children have gone to school). I also said I know a woman who has one child and employs a nanny as it saves her money. That is relevant! Now take your mardy attitude elsewhere.

No... YOUR children are your luxuries. DHs children came first.
By that I mean you made a choice to have children with him despite him already having high outgoings/ responsibilities. Thats your planning/choices

Life appears to be very different for most of us, disabilities, Single parents, CM payments, caring responsibilities. But all these posts usually focus on what the OPs think they should have given income/ what were programmed to expect. The truth is no one owes it to us and it is what it is. You are with someone who has previous responsibilities and thankfully he's honoring them. Wont last forever.