Would you leave 14yo alone in the country for one night?

no I wouldn’t unless a relative could pop in or she could have a sleepover with a friend.
my almost 14 DD is very sensible and independent and could absolutely manage this practically but I think she would be scared.

Well as long as the slim bandits are still behind bars then everything should be ok

Why? I wouldn't do it (though I have left my 14yo home alone overnight before - just wouldn't do it and leave the country with no trusted adult nearby) but it wouldn't meet our threshold for intervention. It's still a parenting choice.

ETA you know Kevin mcallister was 8 years old right?

This has shocked me more than the op contemplating flying abroad and leaving her 14yo home alone

As a child protection social work manager I wouldn't do anything with this referral

No. As a school safeguarding lead, I would report you to social services.

This. PSA to @iloveapplesandcakes and all Mumsnetters.
Get a village. We all need local friends we trust for just this eventuality.

I see you have found a solution so thats good.
Quite aside from anything else if your DS was to mention it at school or something then school may feel they need to report it to SS.
As for The NSPCA not making laws this is true and the under 16's thing is just a guide BUT if anything happens to a child left alone who is under 16 then action could be taken against a parent

Sorry I have just seen that you are now taking your child with you.
I'm pleased this was been resolved.

I'm sorry you have an emergency but I don't think you can leave a 14 year old alone overnight while you are In a different country. It would probably be ok but what if your flight was delayed, what if your 14 year had an accident? Sorry there are to many what ifs
You say you have no family but has she any friends she could stay with overnight?

@Agix

The nspcc is not a legal framework

That’s good you’ve found a solution.

But going forward, will you work on building a local network because that will be invaluable.

I am really sorry you are in this situation - there's no easy answer.

But if you find yourself in a similar issue another time, please just ask a friend. Having a teenager in your house for a couple of nights isn't a huge ask - it's not a baby or toddler - and any reasonable person would be fine to help out someone who has a difficult situation. I know it's really hard to ask so just trying to encourage you. if the emergency is that intense you might need to return and it would be good to have a plan for next time.

If there are lots of flights daily, and you absolutely can’t take your dc with you, could you instead take a very early flight and come back the same day.

No I wouldn't. I remember a friend of my parents did this once with their son. He told a couple of friends in school. It went around social media and loads of older students landed to the house to party. He was scared to say no. House was trashed.

I wonder if it is sometimes that people don't like to impose. In practice if asked I suspect a lot of people would help in an emergency - random neighbours or parents at school even if they are not really friends - but it's a bit of a leap to ask them and to trust them.

I'm struggling to imagine how it could be such a crisis that you need to be there and there are no other options, but also not such a crisis that your child can't miss 2 days of school.

I really don't want to kick you while you're down, but I don't really understand this. He's 14. Surely he has at least a few friends, one of whom would be wililng to take him in for the night? Or, surely YOU have at least one friend, one of whom would be willing to take him in for the night.

DS is 14. He's not a kid with LOADS of friends, but there are enough people out there that I'd feel comfortable in a situation like this contacting a couple of other families and asking if he could stay over foro this one school night. I also have one or two local friends who would happily step in - but he'd probably hate that! Similarl,y I would not normally allow a week night sleepover but if "Dave"'s mum contacted me and asked in an emergency situation like this (for example), of course I'd say yes.

If anything happened, you would never forgive yourself. The McCanns come to mind. Under no circumstances should you leave them alone.

Odd situation. How has this child no friends whose mum would take them overnight? I'd have taken a child's schoolmate overnight in an emergency, even if I didnt like the child.

I'm sorry to hear about this issue. You say there are no friends to stay with. Kindly, this is quite unusual? Does your DC not have any friends?

I'd be an anxious mess if I was abroad with my dc at home with no one to call in an emergency...

I know schools are hot on attendance nowadays, but I'm sure if you said we have a family emergency abroad so she won't be in for two days, it would be fine. Just take her with you

Completely agree - what would happen if involved in a car crash for example? Or needed surgery and hospital stay

No, I wouldn't. I completely hear you that your kid is very capable. I'm a single mum of a 14 year old also and like that my son is quite independent. But that said, if left alone too long they can get scared and can panic, especially with the thought of their only parent being in another country, which is not fair on them really and is also a risk factor because they might do something different when scared. If you have a neighbour you can trust, I would ask them to keep an eye/send them over to a classmates house

Too young OP. As pps have said, your child is your priority, not the relative abroad. What if something happened to you, or your flights or travel were delayed, leaving them alone for even longer?