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AIBU?

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Original poster

To report my son as missing?

459 replies

stucky · 18/03/2025 21:23

Wondering when to start panicking? DS 22, hasn't been home since Friday day time. He usually lets me know what's going on. It's not unusual for him to spend time at a friends for a day or two, however I've messaged his closest friends, no one's seen him since Friday. His phone been dead since Saturday morning. I know he's not a child, but he's my son and I'm concerned about his wellbeing. Should I report him as a missing person? Or am I overreacting? I just don't know what to do.

Please be kind, I am currently feel very fragile.

OP posts:
Doteycat · 18/03/2025 21:56

Have you checked his socials? I know his phone is dead but can you see on whatsapp or Insta when he was last online? Any chance someone on his friends list has him on Google maps location or on snapmaps?
We located someone via snapmaps a few years ago. Its worth a look if you can.

murasaki · 18/03/2025 21:56

If he's not been to work either, that is worrying, I hope he's ok.

MrsSunshine2b · 18/03/2025 21:56

Are you in shock?

Your young adult son disappeared 4 days ago with no trace and hasn't been seen by anyone, of course you need to report him missing.

beasmithwentworth · 18/03/2025 21:56

As some others have said, what possesses people to be so unhelpful and judgemental? What about some support for the OP? She didn’t come on here to be judged or asked unhelpful questions. I echo what the other non judgmental posters have said and yes cast the net as wide as you can with all friends and acquaintances that you might be able to get hold of IRL or on social media.

I hope all turns out ok OP

Mummy1614116 · 18/03/2025 21:56

Hope his ok xx

WatchOutMissMarpleIsAbout · 18/03/2025 21:55

Do you have other dcs that may know where he is? Sending positive thoughts your way.

WhereIsMyJumper · 18/03/2025 21:55

Is this normal behaviour for him???
But yes, of course you should report immediately

Whitelight25 · 18/03/2025 21:55

Please report him. Please let us know what happens.

wherewasoldmcdonalsdfarm · 18/03/2025 21:55

I would call now
perhaps check local hospitals?
ask his friends if he is dating anyone or if they know he is if they can contact them

without committing fraud and get long DH or a male to call up his bank and pretend to be him you won’t be able to find out if his bank card has been used so I wouldn’t do something like that (I’m assuming this has crossed your mind)

does it say when he was last online on Facebook/whatsapp/instagram Perhaps his friends could check for you

ask his friends does he have Snapchat and to snap chat him or check his location in Snapchat They can also check his ‘Snapchat score’ and see if it goes up as that means he’s using it

if you have a home computer/ipad he may use he may be logged in on social media/email. Highly highly highly unlikely but worth checking

ChachiChichi · 18/03/2025 21:53

It's so easy to assume they're fine, and I really hope he is. Definitely report.

Poppyseeds79 · 18/03/2025 21:53

Ring round his friends again to get together a timeline for the police when they come out to speak to you as well. They'll want to know his last known movements.

Also what he was wearing when last in contact.

Spirallingdownwards · 18/03/2025 21:52

I hope he is found safe and sound.

I hope you're okay.

SoftPillow · 18/03/2025 21:52

Oh OP, how awful.

I really hope you find him safely and soon

Iamnotalemming · 18/03/2025 21:51

Yes. I would report him missing.
Sending an unmumsnetty hug.

Easterbunnygettingsorted · 18/03/2025 21:51

Def report. Have a photo ready for the police.

Userxyd · 18/03/2025 21:51

Tell his friends you're doing it, in case they're in contact with him, and then do it - call the police. Good luck

Overhaul54 · 18/03/2025 21:50

Feeling for you Op.
I understand that he's 22 and adult so you want to give the benefit of the doubt ( especially at the weekend)
You should report now though if it's feeling off to you.

Fingers crossed.

Nervousforscan · 18/03/2025 21:50

Don't beat yourself up for leaving it til now. When I was 19 and lived at home it was extremely normal for me to not go home for 3 or 4 days and I wouldn't always check in during this time at all. This was late 00s - my phone was definitely with me at all times so wasn't unusual to have messaged - I just generally didn't! I had a car, a job and a boyfriend. My family wouldn't have thought twice.

That said now you know he hasn't been at work definitely report.

thatsfunnybecause · 18/03/2025 21:49

Obviously. He hasn’t been seen or heard from in days

morbidd · 18/03/2025 21:49

Report asap and get on Facebook sharing his information.

Isittimeformynapyet · 18/03/2025 21:49

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WavyRavey · 18/03/2025 21:48

Absolutely call now, I sure hope he's okay

MinnieCoops · 18/03/2025 21:48

Definitely. I hope all is well. I’d be a wreck.

PickledMuffin · 18/03/2025 21:48

Hope he is safe and sound x

Hwi · 18/03/2025 21:48

Report immediately! And ask his friends again and again, don't be embarrassed.

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