Will I ever get a job? Utterly useless

You want the dream job..not many exist! I am a single mum with a degree in journalism, but I work 25 hours doing sales administrator job coz it fits in with school pick up. have to use my holidays for school hols and I'm lucky I have parents who pick up the extra days I cant do, either that or I force them to do a sports club if I'm desperate !
I think you have to lower your expectations of the job you want tbh

I remember several years ago a poster said they did freelance work for an estate agent. They just went to the houses to measure rooms, jot down locations of meters, number of power sockets etc for the particulars. Got handed the keys for each one and was able to go when it suited her and write up at home.

Maybe you could approach a few estate agents about this?

But what are you expecting other people to do about it? You need to find a way of addressing your issues

I haven't been able to read all the replies but a few things.

Firstly, looking for basically a full time home based and term time only job is like buying a unicorn. You might just have to suck it up and get perm to start with, look into holiday camps, childminders etc. You will need some childcare back up to be able to juggle this.

In pretty much all jobs i've had ( from starting to senior manager) there is always some admin, so don't discount anything on this basis. If you can cope with the kids life admin, you can cope with a job admin.

It sounds very much like you are trying to talk yourself out of having a job, your post includes quite a lot if excuses, you need to build up your confidence! I absolutely have ADHD and possibly ASD too ( paid for my child assessment, couldn't afford mine but we are basically the same!) I struggle to focus, so i set small goals and sometimes even timers to plough through the work.

I have been a full time working single parent. It is doable but you have to find some self belief and you also have to be realistic about the types of jobs you will be able to get after being out of the game for so long.

Best of luck!

Well, go on then! What's stopping you? If you're good you can make decent money. It does help to be personable though...

I used to work in Higher education administration, the sector is shedding jobs currently. It’s also very hierarchical and the way you are coming across, I’m not saying it’s good or bad but I think that it would irritate you,.

Go into some and ask if they have any jobs going. My friend did this with no experience and wound up being one for five years!

I think you are just asking for some support x it is scary throwing yourself in to a job when you still have children who need you and no back up childcare and when you’ve not been working for a while x go easy on yourself. Remember you are good at what you do maybe take the next opportunity an see what happens :)

Try going to an agency. In person. I've been searching for a job for months and tried registering with agencies online/over the phone. They were all awful. I've been in despair. My friend dragged me to one in person today and it made all the difference! They know exactly what they're doing and where to place people. I feel a little positive for the first time in years. Good luck to you. I suspect you can do more than you think you can!

What I didn’t need was criticism, predictions of doom and people imploring me to work at Tesco

you’ve been deliberately evasive about your degrees, qualifications and the 15 yrs of work experience you have. Without having any idea of how long you’ve been out of work, whether you were qualified as a clinical biologist, a trusts lawyer or metrology engineer, and with your references to anxiety and panic people are going to suggest something that is achievable for someone with unspecified qualifications and no recent experience

Estate agent or recruiter? You'd have the chats and relationship building and be able to do that as you're educated but no need for boring long written reports etc

For sure, women who go back to work after mat leave put in the hard yards and justly deserve the reward that comes later, in hopefully achieving promotions along the way, salary increases, and pension contributions. Women who take time out to stay at home for an extended period more often than not rejoin the workforce at a lower rank and payscale than they were previously on, and never really recoup the loss in lifelong earnings. I don’t think the op is expecting to jump back into a flying career like the gap wasn’t there. It’s an unfortunate reality that the gender gap exists, and the SAH years make that worse. I’m still on a lower salary than I was on in 2004, and I’m back in the workforce ten years.

What type of work have you previously done? It’s hard to help you without knowing what work you’ve done previously.

Holiday childcare isn't that big a deal.
Get a holiday nanny if holiday camps don't work for your kids. Plenty of nanny agencies offer them. They can be great - enthusiastic students or charming Aussies on working holiday visas, can take the kids out on day trips or do sports or chill at home.

Yes it is expensive. But you are already covering your living costs via rental income and maintenance so if you have to spend 20pc of your annual income on some holiday childcare, the 80pc of your annual income that isn't spend on childcare is still an uplift to your current income.

It's not like when you are in benefits and your marginal gains from working are minimal as you lose your benefits - all your additional income is on top of your existing income so if you have to spend some of your new income on childcare, so be it.

So don't use childcare as a reason. Plenty of us don't have grandparents on hand and live in big cities far across the sea from them. It's perfectly normal in London.
Your situation is not uniquely complicated.

Like the rest of your reasons, this is not a valid one for why you can't work.

There's always an element of luck. Also, where did the OP say she wanted a senior role? Maybe OP won't find something perfect for her, but given her qualifications, aiming a little higher than a supermarket checkout job doesn't seem unreasonable!

I wholeheartedly aggressive with you,
It’s not dissing ADHD, it’s being realistic in a workplace.
Whilst I would love to say it’s easy , it’s not. There are plenty of people vying for the same job and having a disability does make it more difficult and challenging.
It’s not saying you can’t get a job you want, more you will need to work harder to overcome the obstacles you face.

Your strengths being creative and persuasive, plus university educated - perhaps look into lecturing? It would give you the holidays off / wfh?

You think what I said was character assassination?

@AllProperTeaIsTheft with respect this is a different situation to the girls you teach. We are not saying that the OP shouldn’t aim for a career she loves, but that she needs some form of work experience. And no one is going to offer her a senior level job when she has had years out of the work place.
I just get sick of people who feel the rest of us in good jobs are somehow lucky to get where we are. We often put our babies in nursery at 8 months, we missed sunny afternoons and school plays, we did all of this to be able to sit back a bit later.