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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anyone struggle with a purpose if childfree?

255 replies

butterfly172 · 17/03/2025 08:12

Hi,
I'm 42 and childfree by choice. I'm about to get married to a wonderful man and I'm a step-parent to his 3 adult children, whom all accept me and me them.

However, since my SD had her baby, I'm wondering what purpose I have in this life if I chose not to be a mum?

Does anyone have any advice? Feeling like I'm stuck in a rut of life and don't know what my purpose is if not a parent.

OP posts:
CottageGoblin · 17/03/2025 08:23

What do you think your purpose in life is, OP?
What do you feel like you’re missing out on?

Gah81 · 17/03/2025 08:22

Am also child free by choice and have never struggled with this.

I have a busy, senior-level career which seeks to do some good in the world, a few fulfilling hobbies which I am aiming to develop mastery of, and work hard to maintain deep, loving relationships with DH, my mother, friends and family. I also volunteer when I have spare time, read a lot and try to think carefully about the world.

My purpose? To use whatever talents and skills I have to do what I can to make the world - and the lives of the people around me - better, or at least not to make anything worse!

Being a mother is a wonderful thing, but not the only opportunity for a woman to have a purpose.

FreeRider · 17/03/2025 08:20

No

HTH

TheCountofMountingCrispBags · 17/03/2025 08:19

Sorry, but you are questioning your purpose in life at 42?
What have you been doig up until now? And why do you think being a mother is the only purpose of a woman's life?

Heelworkhero · 17/03/2025 08:15

To live and enjoy my life!