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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to go to big concert on my own?

95 replies

Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:20

We have plans for DD to come with me to a big concert. However, it’s during her exams and I’m not sure whether she should take time out revising. It would be a Saturday night staying in a hotel and returning on Sunday. We are planning on her to keep revising by working on past papers on the train and in a cafe while there (she works well in cafes—much better than at home).

Anyway, the point of this post is really to ask would it be strange if I go on my own? Everyone is telling me I shouldn’t and it’s sad, but I don’t want to miss out. I’ve waited 35 years to get to see this person live. Would you go on your own?

OP posts:
Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:53

I also want her to come as it’s in my university city and I’d love to show her around. I’m so excited!

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 16/03/2025 16:50

Dd can have one day off revision . Take her

But going on own is fine !

If your dh friends sisters that worried then one of them can go with you!

But take dd she can have some hours off

Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:50

5128gap · 16/03/2025 16:45

Who is the 'we' who had thought DD could go, but now thinks otherwise? Is one of the 'we' DD herself? Because if not, I think its sad to stop her going. If her exam success is dependent on not being able to take one evening and morning off from revision, then that's a very tight margin for success. Really she should be able to afford a break and would probably benefit from it. But it's not sad to go alone if it's DD who has changed her mind.

DH, DD and myself are all questioning it. It’s not a morning and a night—it’s two full days away from 9am Saturday to 5pm on Sunday. But i really want her to come! It all depends on whether she thinks she can get some
study hours in while on the train/in cafes.

OP posts:
Brownhairdontcare · 16/03/2025 16:49

A Kylie gig on your own will be absolutely fine! Everyone will be busy dancing and smiling and having a good time. I do loads of stuff on my own and it's absolutely fine. Your family and friends are the odd ones for being so uncomfortable in their own skin that they need other people with them in public!

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 16/03/2025 16:47

What does your DD want to do? As if she really wants to go then I see no problem in that. She shouldn’t be revising 24 hours a day anyway, and as you say, she can revise on the journey. I probably wouldn’t recommend a gig which meant a late night immediately before an important exam, but it sounds like that isn’t the case if you have a day you are travelling back.

If your DD was just going to accompany you and is concerned herself that it will interrupt her studies, then, yes, it will be absolutely fine to go by yourself.

ChinaChina · 16/03/2025 16:46

Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:39

No, Kylie Minogue 😀

Show quote history

I sensed a Rick Roll coming on.

Enjoy Kylie.

notacooldad · 16/03/2025 16:46

I'm going to two gigs alone this week.
I haven't bothered to ask friends and Dh won't be home from work in time.
Im not missing out!

5128gap · 16/03/2025 16:45

Who is the 'we' who had thought DD could go, but now thinks otherwise? Is one of the 'we' DD herself? Because if not, I think its sad to stop her going. If her exam success is dependent on not being able to take one evening and morning off from revision, then that's a very tight margin for success. Really she should be able to afford a break and would probably benefit from it. But it's not sad to go alone if it's DD who has changed her mind.

Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:45

Redshoeblueshoe · 16/03/2025 16:41

Actually I think you are being mean. Take your DD, are you expecting her to revise every minute of every day until her exams are over ?

Not every minute, but, yes, every day in this situation. It will only be 4-5 days before the exam.

OP posts:
ChinaChina · 16/03/2025 16:44

I treat myself once a year to a concert on my own, I love it!

ICanTellYouMissMe · 16/03/2025 16:44

I go to plenty of gigs on my own, big, small, whatever. But - I also wouldn’t force anyone to constantly study! Unless she has an exam on the Monday after the weekend away, I don’t really see the issue.

ItGhoul · 16/03/2025 16:42

Of course it’s not strange.

Redshoeblueshoe · 16/03/2025 16:41

Actually I think you are being mean. Take your DD, are you expecting her to revise every minute of every day until her exams are over ?

Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:39

mewkins · 16/03/2025 16:37

Are you going to see Neil Young? I'll come with you 😁

I've been to gigs on my own and it's been fine. And I see plenty of solo gig goers too.

No, Kylie Minogue 😀

OP posts:
Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:39

Horsesandyoga · 16/03/2025 16:36

You are mean not to give your DD the choice to have a break especially seeing she studies hard. If she doesn't know it by the time of the exams she won't know it.

I’m not being mean—I’m just concerned. I’m going to wait to see how she’s doing the week before to make a decision (which will be done with her input). .

OP posts:
mewkins · 16/03/2025 16:37

Are you going to see Neil Young? I'll come with you 😁

I've been to gigs on my own and it's been fine. And I see plenty of solo gig goers too.

Horsesandyoga · 16/03/2025 16:36

You are mean not to give your DD the choice to have a break especially seeing she studies hard. If she doesn't know it by the time of the exams she won't know it.

Original poster
Ineedcoffeenow · 16/03/2025 16:33

Thank you everybody. I’m not going to miss it. I might quite enjoy getting away on my own for a night in a nice hotel.

DD has planned to go with me to see this person for a few years now. When we booked it, I thought it would be OK. I’m just getting a bit antsy about taking her away. Her place at uni depends on these exams and I couldn’t forgive myself if she lost out due to this. On the other hand, she is good at working on trains etc.

OP posts:
TunnocksOrDeath · 16/03/2025 16:33

Back in the 90s I got a last minute ticket for Glastonbury from a friend of a friend after someone got ill, we somehow found eachother, pitched adjacent tents and then just checked in twice a day, because we didn't have the same music taste at all. It was brilliant!
Be wary of anyone who tells you that doing something independent is "sad"; they are usually really boring types who need constant validation from being, and being seen to be, in the company of others.

PuppyMonkey · 16/03/2025 16:32

Take your DD. Mine is having a night off on a Saturday in the middle of her A levels to do something similar. It’ll be fine.

Ilovelowry · 16/03/2025 16:31

I've been to concerts on my own since I was 14 and my friends refused to see Jason Donovan with me.

I go to the cinema alone and I've holidayed alone abroad before DH.

It's not weird at all.

sidebirds · 16/03/2025 16:30

In order to assist responses, may I ask the identity of the artiste that you have waited 35 years to see? 🤔

MakeYourOwnMusicStartYourOwnDance · 16/03/2025 16:30

Twoweeksandcounting · 16/03/2025 16:25

I went to a big concert on my own a couple of years ago, and had the time of my life!! I purposely went alone, I didn’t want to have to worry if another person was having a nice time, whether they were comfortable, whether they were happy with heading close to the front, etc. I’d gladly do it again!

Exactly, that's a big reason I love going places by myself - you can do and go where the hell you like with no moaning/other people arguing over what to do😁

RedHelenB · 16/03/2025 16:30

If dd wants to go she can have a break from revising.

Comedyusername · 16/03/2025 16:30

Going alone is totally fine, but take your daughter if she'd enjoy it. It sounds like you've planned it very well.