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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be embarrassed my colleague announced my coat size to whole office

334 replies

howemb · 15/03/2025 15:19

Bit embarrassing … or am I being over sensitive?

OP posts:
MyLimeGuide · 15/03/2025 16:55

soupyspoon · 15/03/2025 16:34

Me too Im waiting for the response before I do my next lot of cleaning and tidying, I havent got all day!!

Op!! Hellooo? People need to move on with their lives!! 😂

DingDingRound3 · 15/03/2025 16:53

I have clothes from size 6 - 14 in my wardrobe. I have a bikini that’s a 12 top (I have no tits), 10 bottom - I’m pear shaped. Sizing really is just a number.

Try not to think about it OP, those that judge are not worth the head space. X

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:52

But I also think if I was working in an office and someone shouted out a persons coat size I’d either ignore it or think the shouter had lost the plot. It wouldnt occur to me to think anything about the coat owner

(unless she had an unusually large pelvis )

LiveinHarmony · 15/03/2025 16:51

YANBU op. It is not their information to share, nobody needs to know that! What is the context to this?

JustSawJohnny · 15/03/2025 16:49

As an aside, I do think that, if you are an eg 22 or larger, you'd have to be an utter twunt to announce that across the office.

Pure bitchiness.

JustSawJohnny · 15/03/2025 16:48

Hoplolly · 15/03/2025 15:20

Oversensitive, it's just a number, and unless they are blind, surely they'd have a good idea what size you are anyway?

Depends what size you are.

I think most people would be happy to have a 4-12 shouted out, but a 22+?

Nope.

OneShoeShort · 15/03/2025 16:45

You’re not unreasonable to feel embarrassed. That’s just a feeling not a reason-based decision. And we live in a society that heavily encourages us to attach all sorts of emotions to size and weight, including shame.

But you feeling embarrassed about size and weight doesn’t mean your coworker has wronged you in any way, so you would be unreasonable to blame them unless they were blatantly criticizing your weight.

SpongeKnobNoPants · 15/03/2025 16:44

As others have said, depends on the context of how this announcement was made.

If it was on the back of your chair and just colleague whipped it off and yelled "oh my God, guess what OPs size is? She's a size --!" and the colleague laughed hysterically, then yeah, YANBU.

ModernLife1sRubbish · 15/03/2025 16:42

FFS .. it's no wonder I never get anything done. I've been googling 'average female pelvis size' and I'm still none the wiser.

JillAndJenTheFlowerpotMen · 15/03/2025 16:39

I just don’t understand the biology here. So with this unusually large pelvis on the tall skinny woman, she wouldn’t have had a large waist and the bum would be small, but the hips perhaps wider than usual. I don’t see why the coat would have to be big.

unless it was an unusually large unusually large pelvis. Any medics around who have expertise in skeletal conditions?

soupyspoon · 15/03/2025 16:37

Kuretake · 15/03/2025 16:36

It's intriguing. We know the pelvis is wide enough to require a size 14 yet not visible by looking at her.

She'll walk like John Wayne surely?

Kuretake · 15/03/2025 16:36

FiveTreeHill · 15/03/2025 16:34

Also I'm picturing what a tall thin woman with a hidden unusually large pelvis may look like

It's intriguing. We know the pelvis is wide enough to require a size 14 yet not visible by looking at her.

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:36

Someone is going to take Unusuallylargepelvis as a username aren’t they?

Mudkipper · 15/03/2025 16:35

I've had this done to me (not in a work environment) and the person who did it was very hung up about her own weight so it was done to make her feel a bit better.

FiveTreeHill · 15/03/2025 16:34

Also I'm picturing what a tall thin woman with a hidden unusually large pelvis may look like

soupyspoon · 15/03/2025 16:34

Fairyliz · 15/03/2025 16:00

Come back op; I’m bored so getting over invested in MN threads.

Me too Im waiting for the response before I do my next lot of cleaning and tidying, I havent got all day!!

FiveTreeHill · 15/03/2025 16:32

OldCottageGreenhouse · 15/03/2025 15:53

Gobsmacked at these responses, I’d be furious! There’s no way of knowing for sure what somebody’s size is from looking at them, that’s nonsense! I know a tall and very thin woman who is a size 14 because she has an unusually large pelvis which isn’t visible from looking at her.

OP, I’d be putting in a complaint. People can roll their eyes all they like but this is that sort of low-level bullying that goes under the radar as it’s small enough on it’s own to look petty to others if you say anything, but actually it’s cumulative and is, in reality, insidious when it’s an ongoing pattern. I’ve been there.

I had a manager who did this shit. Lots & lots of little things, daily, which were never big enough alone for me to look anything other than a daft cow for complaining about it. Had me dreading work in end. I never got him disciplined but wish I had from the start, regardless of how ‘ridiculous’ some thought I was being.

You haven’t said whether this is part of a pattern of behaviour from them but if it is, please nip it in the bud.

But your opinion on what size her body is isn't going to change knowing she wears a size 14 coat.

You can see how big people are when you look at them. Knowing they have at some point bought a coat that's a size 16 or whatever doesn't affect your knowledge of how big they are.

Kuretake · 15/03/2025 16:31

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 15/03/2025 16:26

I'm guessing that the OP is embarrassed that she wears a larger sized coat and thinks that nobody would have been able to determine that she is indeed on the larger side until now, as the size of her coat has been announced.

I, as a student of Mumsnet size threads, am going to guess the reveal will be she's actually a 4 or something. Because as every mumsnetter knows nobody has ever been known to criticise fat women but everyone is "allowed to be" horrible to thin women.

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 15/03/2025 16:29

SherlockHomies · 15/03/2025 16:27

Please say it in the coat department of a very posh shop! 🤣

"I can't possibly buy ANY of these coats as they don't cater for my unusually large pelvis. Who do I complain to?"

To whom do I complain?!! 😆

SherlockHomies · 15/03/2025 16:27

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:25

@PointsSouth 😂 I am SO going to say “I HAVE AN UNUSUALLY LARGE PELVIS” when asked for a fun fact about myself.

Please say it in the coat department of a very posh shop! 🤣

"I can't possibly buy ANY of these coats as they don't cater for my unusually large pelvis. Who do I complain to?"

Teado · 15/03/2025 16:26

I think it could seem unkind if someone is smaller than an 8 or bigger than a 16, and self-conscious about it tbh. And there’s no way of knowing if they are, so it’s best to be quiet.

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 15/03/2025 16:26

StumbleInTheDebris · 15/03/2025 16:18

Can someone explain what is bad about a coat size?
I think I'm missing something.

Apologies, duplicate post

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 15/03/2025 16:26

StumbleInTheDebris · 15/03/2025 16:18

Can someone explain what is bad about a coat size?
I think I'm missing something.

I'm guessing that the OP is embarrassed that she wears a larger sized coat and thinks that nobody would have been able to determine that she is indeed on the larger side until now, as the size of her coat has been announced.

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:25

@PointsSouth 😂 I am SO going to say “I HAVE AN UNUSUALLY LARGE PELVIS” when asked for a fun fact about myself.

Freshstartyear25 · 15/03/2025 16:25

Yeah, we need to know the context.
Anyway, I’m sure most people can guess what size your coat is just by looking at you.