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Original poster

To be embarrassed my colleague announced my coat size to whole office

334 replies

howemb · 15/03/2025 15:19

Bit embarrassing … or am I being over sensitive?

OP posts:
Mumofyellows · 15/03/2025 17:28

PointsSouth · 15/03/2025 16:13

@OldCottageGreenhouse I know a tall and very thin woman who is a size 14 because she has an unusually large pelvis which isn’t visible from looking at her.

If you can't tell by looking at her, in what sense is her pelvis 'unusually large'?

And, even more intriguing, if you can't tell by looking at her, how do you know that her pelvis is unusually large? Was it one of those teambuilding things, where you have to share something surprising about yourself?

"Hi. I'm Terry. On weekends, I drive a miniature train."

"What fun, Terry! Anna?"

"Hello - my name's Anna. I once made a Victoria sponge that was served to Princess Eugenie."

"That's awesome, Anna! Liz?"

"Hiya, everyone. I'm Lizzie, and I have an unusually large pelvis."

"God, really, Lizzie? Cos you can't tell by looking at you. What size is your coat?"

I've just laughed way too much at this 🤣

Friendofdennis · 15/03/2025 17:26

Yes she is saying that you are big and frumpy. Really mean

jellyfishperiwinkle · 15/03/2025 17:26

It's the colleague who should be embarrassed. Why would they do that? How unprofessional.

ThighsYouCantControl · 15/03/2025 17:25

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

That’s not foot in mouth, that’s fucking rude and nasty. Not surprised you’re upset.

SemperIdem · 15/03/2025 17:23

@howemb

I tend to find people who are “famed for putting their foot in their mouth” are actually nasty pieces of work who soon learn to stop once they’re (professionally in this instance) called on it a few times. They do it because they get away with it, not because they’re a special breed of human who can’t engage their brain before speaking.

hairquery · 15/03/2025 17:21

She publicly fat shamed & mocked you. Yanbu!

LiveinHarmony · 15/03/2025 17:16

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:57

That’s an upside down pear surely?!

Show quote history

Yes, this would be an apple shape, but I think the pp was meaning it is the clothes that are sized incorrectly, because she is a pear shape. I think she was highlighted how differing, and incorrect sizing can be.

Teado · 15/03/2025 17:15

Your update !! Wow. YANBU.

In my workplace, the manager would be having a word with her. Seriously. That’s not alright.

5128gap · 15/03/2025 17:15

JillAndJenTheFlowerpotMen · 15/03/2025 16:39

I just don’t understand the biology here. So with this unusually large pelvis on the tall skinny woman, she wouldn’t have had a large waist and the bum would be small, but the hips perhaps wider than usual. I don’t see why the coat would have to be big.

unless it was an unusually large unusually large pelvis. Any medics around who have expertise in skeletal conditions?

Perhaps she also has an atypically dense sternum and a uniquely wide clavicle so needs the size 14 in order to button it up.

LiveinHarmony · 15/03/2025 17:12

ttcat37 · 15/03/2025 17:04

FML, the context matters op!! I thought you meant someone said something like “is this anyone’s coat? Debenhams, size 22?” and voted that you were being a tad sensitive. But after the update, changed to YANBU, as that was rude.

Agreed, I was thinking it was a, "I like your coat, it looks like it'll fit me, what size is it?" type scenario. Even then, I wouldn't agree with it, and especially infront of the whole office. I put YANBU even to the above scenario that I had invented in my head!

The situation is even worse, what an absolute bitch!! FWIW op, she sounds jealous of your lovely coat, and you as well!

Tgfh · 15/03/2025 17:11

Really rude and inappropriate.
Body shaming you in front of colleagues?
Report her to HR.
She deserves to be officially warned to STFU.

JustSawJohnny · 15/03/2025 17:11

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

Right, with this context I can safely say that this person is A GINORMOUS CUNT and you would be well within your rights to tell them so!

What an awful bully they are.

Speak to HR, OP. That's bullying due to your appearance. Not acceptable in the slightest.

Chuchoter · 15/03/2025 17:10

Or the standard retort of, "Thanks for trying to embarrass me, I can lose weight but you'll always be a bitch!'

Chuchoter · 15/03/2025 17:09

You need to be able to quickly retort to office bitchiness.

'I saw the label in your coat, 8 and was impressed . I didn't know you could buy coats that state your IQ!'

ttcat37 · 15/03/2025 17:04

FML, the context matters op!! I thought you meant someone said something like “is this anyone’s coat? Debenhams, size 22?” and voted that you were being a tad sensitive. But after the update, changed to YANBU, as that was rude.

ModernLife1sRubbish · 15/03/2025 17:02

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

Yes that is incredibly rude and bitchy. No doubt if you said something, she would plead ignorance or not see what she'd done wrong.

I had a similar experience once when I was in my early 20s. A colleague (same age as me) looked me up and down and said loudly "oh my mum has that shirt", with an unmistakable smirk on her face. Someone else giggled and I felt mortified. She knew exactly what she was doing. People like that are best ignored. They like to know they've upset you.

CavalierApproach · 15/03/2025 17:02

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

Oh okay, with that additional context it’s much worse tbf.

I would probably tell the person to fuck off, but in a polite and mild tone, and get on with my day.

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 17:01

Oh yes she’s a bitch alright.

Kuretake · 15/03/2025 17:00

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

Yeah that's very very bitchy and YANBU to be pissed off about it.

MyLimeGuide · 15/03/2025 17:00

howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

YANBU - what a massive bitch face that colleague is, i bet you are gorgeous ❤

Spirallingdownwards · 15/03/2025 16:59

OldCottageGreenhouse · 15/03/2025 15:53

Gobsmacked at these responses, I’d be furious! There’s no way of knowing for sure what somebody’s size is from looking at them, that’s nonsense! I know a tall and very thin woman who is a size 14 because she has an unusually large pelvis which isn’t visible from looking at her.

OP, I’d be putting in a complaint. People can roll their eyes all they like but this is that sort of low-level bullying that goes under the radar as it’s small enough on it’s own to look petty to others if you say anything, but actually it’s cumulative and is, in reality, insidious when it’s an ongoing pattern. I’ve been there.

I had a manager who did this shit. Lots & lots of little things, daily, which were never big enough alone for me to look anything other than a daft cow for complaining about it. Had me dreading work in end. I never got him disciplined but wish I had from the start, regardless of how ‘ridiculous’ some thought I was being.

You haven’t said whether this is part of a pattern of behaviour from them but if it is, please nip it in the bud.

But you are saying this as though a size 14 is big? Which makes you sound just as judgy.

stayathomer · 15/03/2025 16:58

The question is was the coat a size bigger to accommodate jumper wearing? I spend an hour standing there thinking fitted or larger to accommodate jumpers? (Op I need to go soon too)

Original poster
howemb · 15/03/2025 16:57

Sorry for not including much detail, I was rushing about a bit (tempted to say I was shoving food into my size 22 mouth …) It was just that though, my coat was on the back of my seat and my colleague said ‘size 22, wow, that would fit my mum!’

It is a colleague who is famed for putting her foot in her mouth so I probably wouldn’t be bothered if it hadn’t been so public!

OP posts:
CavalierApproach · 15/03/2025 16:57

‘Putting in a complaint’ over this would be batshit and would never be forgotten by anyone who learned of it.

How do some people get through the average week if the idea of their coat size being spoken aloud is so horrifying? (I’m saying that as someone who wears an 18/20)

Sidebeforeself · 15/03/2025 16:57

DingDingRound3 · 15/03/2025 16:53

I have clothes from size 6 - 14 in my wardrobe. I have a bikini that’s a 12 top (I have no tits), 10 bottom - I’m pear shaped. Sizing really is just a number.

Try not to think about it OP, those that judge are not worth the head space. X

That’s an upside down pear surely?!