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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To send an employee to a client even though she refuses because of her religion?

640 replies

GelatinousDynamo · 15/03/2025 13:30

I have a new employee in my team, she is a devout Muslim. She's been with us since January and there were no issues so far, she's getting along well with everyone and her performance was fine. I sent her an email on Friday afternoon to say that our client has now (finally) prepared all necessary documents and that she should go there and go over everything with them one day next week. She wrote me back today that she can't do that because only men work in the department and she can't spend the day alone with strange men (because of her religion).

AIBU to insist that she does her job and goes there or would that be religious discrimination? She shares an office with a male colleague and has never complained about it. She's the first devout Muslim I've ever had on my team and I honestly have no experience at all with such issues. She's the only one who has the necessary experience and isn't already scheduled elsewhere.

OP posts:
user902101 · 15/03/2025 17:23

Diningtableornot · 15/03/2025 17:00

I didn't mean that the client should pay someone to sit there during the meeting. But if there happens to be a woman in the next door office who would be happy to swap desks for the morning, why not ask her to do it? If there isn't, they can say no. Personally I would be delighted to do this kind of thing to support a Muslim woman in the workplace.

Do you work in a male dominated industry?
If you feel totally secure it’s easy to do things like this. But if you’re a minority this sort of thing costs you in social capital - so not everyone is in a position to do this. Shame it’s that way but that’s my experience of it

Ketchupbroc · 15/03/2025 17:22

VanillaVein · 15/03/2025 17:20

So many women on here who instead of posting absolute shite on the internet should really spend time educating themselves on the law and rights. You might learn something.

Love it when a poster rides in on their stallion and gives the thread a piece of their mind whilst contributing bugger all itself to the matter at hand! 😂

StMarie4me · 15/03/2025 17:21

Onlyonekenobe · 15/03/2025 13:36

If her religion precludes her from doing her job, she needs to find another job imo.

Yes this is a reasonable way of looking at it. Like the same employee getting a job in a sandwich shop then refusing to sell bacon/sausage/ ham butties. No reasonable adjustment at all can be made. They simply can’t do the job.

VanillaVein · 15/03/2025 17:20

So many women on here who instead of posting absolute shite on the internet should really spend time educating themselves on the law and rights. You might learn something.

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 17:18

Oblomov25 · 15/03/2025 17:15

Surely employer only needs to prove that they have considered and tried to find a 'reasonable' adjustment.

Yes.

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 17:17

ThatsNotMyTeen · 15/03/2025 17:10

You are only required by law to make reasonable adjustments to avoid disability discrimination. The duty to make reasonable adjustments doesn’t apply to any of the other protected characteristics

It may not be specifically called that but it’s covered by the legislation relating to indirect discrimination. You are absolutely required to make reasonable adjustments to avoid indirect discrimination.

See p8 at the link.

https://www.equalityhumanrights.com/sites/default/files/religion-or-belief-guide-to-the-law.pdf

https://www.equalityhumanrights.com/sites/default/files/religion-or-belief-guide-to-the-law.pdf

Oblomov25 · 15/03/2025 17:15

Surely employer only needs to prove that they have considered and tried to find a 'reasonable' adjustment.

SerendipityJane · 15/03/2025 17:13

Diningtableornot · 15/03/2025 17:10

No, they may not. I was suggesting that this was one possibility that could be explored. There's no need for demanding and suing, but a bit of a brainstorm for a solution that might suit everyone could bear fruit.

Alterantively the client could provide a female identifying chaperone ?

Who knew modern life could be such fun ?

Bleeky · 15/03/2025 17:13

“Chaperone” … I don’t think that employer should take responsibility for providing whatever being a “chaperone” entails. Chaperone must be female, cannot leave employee alone at any time with men. Etc. it’s too risky. Imagine if chaperone went to loo, or fell ill and had to leave.

I suggested earlier, send her an email confirming that SHE turned down the assignment because of the client workplace demographics. In the email, let her know that it’s her decision & in future, it will be her decision.
You can’t provide or find clients to meet her needs alone. No one should be making extra expense of staff to be there for her.

She can put 2+2 together herself regarding “good assignments”. She herself is choosing.

Don’t exclude her, let her self exclude, in writing.

If she complains about not getting good assignments, you can let her know you always give her a choice. She turns them down.

She herself can figure out her career long term.

ThatsNotMyTeen · 15/03/2025 17:10

MrsSunshine2b · 15/03/2025 17:09

You are required by law to make reasonable adjustments, so if you consider this unreasonable, you need to be able to explain why. It seems a bit far-fetched that there is no other time or other person who could possibly do this job. What if she was on long term sick, what would your plan be?

You are only required by law to make reasonable adjustments to avoid disability discrimination. The duty to make reasonable adjustments doesn’t apply to any of the other protected characteristics

Diningtableornot · 15/03/2025 17:10

saraclara · 15/03/2025 17:04

@Diningtableornot the employee is going to the client's offices. OP can hardly demand that the client furnish one of their female staff to chaperone. They may not even have anyone female anyway.

No, they may not. I was suggesting that this was one possibility that could be explored. There's no need for demanding and suing, but a bit of a brainstorm for a solution that might suit everyone could bear fruit.

MissHollysDolly · 15/03/2025 17:09

pistaacioaquestion · 15/03/2025 13:51

@OldCottageGreenhouseI get your point but the analogy doesn’t quite work. A devout Christian would have no reason to not attend a meeting with someone gay/trans. They may possibly object to attending a wedding of a gay or trans couple due to their religion, but there’s nothing to say they can’t attend a business meeting with anyone gay/trans. And I say this as a devout Catholic. Anyone using Christianity as an excuse for not doing a business meeting for this reason would be missing the message of “judge not lest you yourself be judged”. Sorry went off on a tangent there, but I do appreciate you acknowledging how Christian employees are often not given the same acceptance as employees of other faiths.

I used to work at an agency with a devout Christian, who, when a very well know gay rights organisation came on board as a client absolutely point blank refused to work on their account. So yeah, they can.

ThatsNotMyTeen · 15/03/2025 17:09

There is a risk of indirect religion and belief discrimination but as long as you can justify the request as a proportionate means of achieving a legitimate aim then you can issue her an instruction to do it, and if she doesn’t she risks being disciplined or dismissed.

MrsSunshine2b · 15/03/2025 17:09

You are required by law to make reasonable adjustments, so if you consider this unreasonable, you need to be able to explain why. It seems a bit far-fetched that there is no other time or other person who could possibly do this job. What if she was on long term sick, what would your plan be?

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 17:08

saraclara · 15/03/2025 17:02

Also, I note the OP hasn’t said what her employer did with the male Muslim employees who refused to work with female managers.

Yes she has. He was let go.

Edited

Sorry, I missed that.

In which case, that may be what is needed here. I assume HR have the process of how to get rid of someone for this reason documented.

However, it is essential the OP follow HR advice to the letter in documenting why the accommodation asked for isn’t reasonable.

This may well end up before a tribunal and being able to prove good faith attempts to address the request are likely to be the difference between winning and losing.

SerendipityJane · 15/03/2025 17:07

saraclara · 15/03/2025 17:04

@Diningtableornot the employee is going to the client's offices. OP can hardly demand that the client furnish one of their female staff to chaperone. They may not even have anyone female anyway.

Or the client could just refuse and say "thanks, but maybe we'll hire a company that doesn't need such fuss" ?

Then you'd have another chance at seeing what courts look like, suing the client for .... something or other.

saraclara · 15/03/2025 17:04

@Diningtableornot the employee is going to the client's offices. OP can hardly demand that the client furnish one of their female staff to chaperone. They may not even have anyone female anyway.

saraclara · 15/03/2025 17:02

Also, I note the OP hasn’t said what her employer did with the male Muslim employees who refused to work with female managers.

Yes she has. He was let go.

Diningtableornot · 15/03/2025 17:00

user902101 · 15/03/2025 15:44

I think it’s very risky for OP to ask a client to provide an employee of theirs (at their cost) to chaperone an external consultant. Unless they are also Muslim and/or very understanding they are unlikely to want to pay extra to support someone else’s religion. They’ll simply not place any orders in future. That’s a financial disaster.

OP’s company probably have to document their request and her refusal. Then send someone else.

looking ahead OP will have to make requests in writing and when they are refused record the answer.

Take legal advice and raise this with the employee in a sensitive way at a review. It being a technical industry with external clients, problems with men might affect 100% of the external visits. If that’s an essential part of the job how has she dealt with this before? How can this be supported going forward? Record all the details and then hopefully things improve. Best case you find a way to work it out together? (Seek legal advice on how all this has to be managed regarding the Equality Act etc)

But if at the end of the probation if she’s not been able to complete all the work required of her roll then she fails her probation surely?

If she is in a technical/male dominated girl and didn’t mention this restriction at interview then thats a serious omission. Especially if it’s the reason she left her last employer.

I didn't mean that the client should pay someone to sit there during the meeting. But if there happens to be a woman in the next door office who would be happy to swap desks for the morning, why not ask her to do it? If there isn't, they can say no. Personally I would be delighted to do this kind of thing to support a Muslim woman in the workplace.

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 16:56

C8H10N4O2 · 15/03/2025 16:52

Its 2025 and you think a moslem (or other strict faith) shouldn't go into a male dominated industry rather than the work set up adjustments to accommodate some staff restrictions?

I'm in the most male dominated end of tech in big consulting and even our most male dominated clients have women working for them hence my unsanswered question upthread about sector. IME clients themselves will often help accommodate a specific request or need for a meeting - of course you have to ask.

I am also surprised that a new employee is being sent out to a client without some form of buddy from the firm initially as standard practice (unless employed at fairly senior level) or that no swap is possible or that the onsite team from the OP's company can't assist.

Also wondering how the new employee knows there are no women working at this client.

The OP was the buddy for the first couple of visits which is how they know there are no women.

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 16:55

user902101 · 15/03/2025 16:24

Sorry my example wasnt good.

In a male dominated industry I’ve frequently been the only woman in the room. It’s an expectation. A reality of the job.

What are you expecting OP to do in that situation? Her clients are predominantly male

It may well be there are no reasonable accommodations but that needs to be properly documented.

Also, I note the OP hasn’t said what her employer did with the male Muslim employees who refused to work with female managers.

Unless she wants a sex discrimination claim, her employer probably needs to do the same as they did in those cases. If she (or her employer) arranged for male employees to only work with men, she probably needs to arrange for this woman to only work with women. Edited to say: or only work with men according to the religious requirements laid down.

If the men were told they could either work with women or leave, the processes are already in place to deal with this request.

C8H10N4O2 · 15/03/2025 16:52

Its 2025 and you think a moslem (or other strict faith) shouldn't go into a male dominated industry rather than the work set up adjustments to accommodate some staff restrictions?

I'm in the most male dominated end of tech in big consulting and even our most male dominated clients have women working for them hence my unsanswered question upthread about sector. IME clients themselves will often help accommodate a specific request or need for a meeting - of course you have to ask.

I am also surprised that a new employee is being sent out to a client without some form of buddy from the firm initially as standard practice (unless employed at fairly senior level) or that no swap is possible or that the onsite team from the OP's company can't assist.

Also wondering how the new employee knows there are no women working at this client.

CandidHedgehog · 15/03/2025 16:49

ChilliLips · 15/03/2025 16:20

Reasonable adjustments are for disabilities.

There’s a lot of fairytale ‘law’ going on here.

Yes, like believing reasonable adjustments only relate to disabilities for one.

https://www.equalityhumanrights.com/sites/default/files/religion-or-belief-guide-to-the-law.pdf

https://www.equalityhumanrights.com/sites/default/files/religion-or-belief-guide-to-the-law.pdf

SerendipityJane · 15/03/2025 16:48

Disgraceful that women are advocating disadvantaging other women like, and to satisfy a demand of patriarchy too!

Maybe they are doing what their husbands say ?

Lovelysausagedogscrumpy · 15/03/2025 16:48

mudandgrass · 15/03/2025 16:33

The employer is only obliged to accommodate if the adjustment needed is reasonable. OP has explained quite comprehensibly in this thread why there is no reasonable adjustment that they can make.

I am also pretty sickened by the way there are posters on this thread prepared to shove under women under the bus with their ' chaperone' suggestions. Why should another woman have her own work life compromised by having to spend time sitting uselessly in the room with a woman who does not need her there for professional reasons? The Muslim women can choose to follow a strict interpretation of her religion if she chooses, and accept the consequences of that. Another woman should not be forced to compromise her own working life to suit a patriarchal religion. Its disgraceful that in 2025 in the UK women on here are actually supporting two women having their work life compromised to satisfy the demands of a strict interpretation of a patriarchal religion. Its not men being asked to sit uselessly at meetings is it? Men are not being adversely affected by this are they?

How many of those advocating this would actually happy to have to give up a day a week, or whatever, of their working time, time they will have to make up to meet their own job demands, to sit and do nothing just because Islam demands it?

If you read all of my posts, I have pointed out that ‘reasonable’ is the definition here. The Act accepts that reasonable adjustment is not always possible, and if, for legitimate reasons, it cannot be found, then sometimes the only alternative is to let the employee go. But it doesn’t absolve the employer from the obligation to consider reasonable adjustment to avoid indirect discrimination.