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Original poster

Daughter is wearing inappropriate bikini on family holiday.

131 replies

romma · 14/03/2025 23:55

We are going on holiday to Cyprus and daughter has bought a bunch of thong style bikinis, she’s a teenager but how do I talk to her about it. As there will be extended family

OP posts:
YourPithyHazelLion · 15/03/2025 00:18

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Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:18

crumblingschools · 15/03/2025 00:17

I wouldn’t want to see her bottom cheeks, don’t think it is just about male relatives.

I’m like do it if you are alone not when everyone is around

OP posts:
YourPithyHazelLion · 15/03/2025 00:18

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crumblingschools · 15/03/2025 00:17

I wouldn’t want to see her bottom cheeks, don’t think it is just about male relatives.

EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:16

On every beach holiday I've been on recently, thong bikinis are very much the vogue, even on 50 or 60+ year old women. Maybe not with British tourists but everyone else.

PrincessFairyWren · 15/03/2025 00:13

well it is beachwear and she is going to be at the beach. She is also an adult. I haven’t been to Cypress but thong bikinis aren’t out of place on the beach holidays I’ve been on.

don’t think this is a hill I’d choose to die on.

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:11

Friendofdennis · 15/03/2025 00:10

You are right not to want her to feel that she is embarrassing etc. Put the emphasis on the reactions of the extended family. Explain that while she has nothing to be embarrassed about, it is a fact that wider family can be uncomfortable with the sexualised body of young people in the family etc but this is NOT her problem. Nevertheless for comfort of others would she consider wearing a sarong when around them Don’t tell her what to do but just ask her. If she doesn’t want to do this don’t make a fuss and just let extended family deal with their own reactions Try to enjoy your holiday

I’ve tried to say it like that. She’s saying she shouldn’t be made to cover up because there’s going to be male relatives there and that it’s their problem not hers if they are uncomfortable

OP posts:
Friendofdennis · 15/03/2025 00:10

You are right not to want her to feel that she is embarrassing etc. Put the emphasis on the reactions of the extended family. Explain that while she has nothing to be embarrassed about, it is a fact that wider family can be uncomfortable with the sexualised body of young people in the family etc but this is NOT her problem. Nevertheless for comfort of others would she consider wearing a sarong when around them Don’t tell her what to do but just ask her. If she doesn’t want to do this don’t make a fuss and just let extended family deal with their own reactions Try to enjoy your holiday

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:09

PixieTales · 15/03/2025 00:08

What sort of 19 year old wants to strut around infront of their family in a thong bikini?! Sorry but that is odd behaviour and yes inappropriate! OP you are not wrong for having a word with her over this..but quite odd she doesn’t see the problem herself!

I don’t get it honestly. She’s like I want to work on my tan, there’s nothing wrong with the bikinis I have bought. Typical teenager

OP posts:
PixieTales · 15/03/2025 00:08

What sort of 19 year old wants to strut around infront of their family in a thong bikini?! Sorry but that is odd behaviour and yes inappropriate! OP you are not wrong for having a word with her over this..but quite odd she doesn’t see the problem herself!

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:07

EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:06

Is it in Coral Bay by any chance? I only ask as my PIL had a villa there with a similar setup and topless is massive there so I wouldn't worry!

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It is near there

OP posts:
TwattyMcFuckFace · 15/03/2025 00:06

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EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:06

romma · 15/03/2025 00:03

we are renting a private villa with its own beach

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Is it in Coral Bay by any chance? I only ask as my PIL had a villa there with a similar setup and topless is massive there so I wouldn't worry!

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:03

EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:02

She should 100% take coverups anyway as you need them to walk through most hotels.

we are renting a private villa with its own beach

OP posts:
EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:02

She should 100% take coverups anyway as you need them to walk through most hotels.

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:02

EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:01

It's the beach! I presume Grandad and Uncle Mike are also bringing their flabby tummies out too?

Uncle is yes unfortunately. Grandad always wears t shirts

OP posts:
Chocolate85 · 15/03/2025 00:02

Compromise, ask her to take a couple of full bum ones for when you’re likely to see family and she can wear the other ones when not. My then 20 year old came on a family holiday and had this bikini that I considered way OTT. I told her how inappropriate it was, she moaned, disagreed but then took one decent bikini and ended up wearing it as she suddenly felt conscious in front of her extended family.

Jalapenosplease · 15/03/2025 00:02

romma · 14/03/2025 23:58

That’s true she’s old enough to decide but as her mum I feel it’s inappropriate

I get you. I'm late 30s and my mum would still tell me off 🤭

It is her choice, but in my opinion it is a little inappropriate when she's on holiday with her parents and extended family. I suppose ultimately you can't stop her. But it is good etiquette to be modest in front of relatives.

I can walk around my house in bra and knickers, but if my brother came round I'd cover up. Not because I have to, just because, well, modesty. And it's an unwritten rule that it's inappropriate

EconomyClassRockstar · 15/03/2025 00:01

It's the beach! I presume Grandad and Uncle Mike are also bringing their flabby tummies out too?

Original poster
romma · 15/03/2025 00:00

Jalapenosplease · 14/03/2025 23:58

I'm surprised she wants to flash her bum with extended family there 🤭

Depends on age. If she's 16+ I'd just have a word and say, "if you're hanging out with the wider family, take a sarong" keep it lighthearted.

I’m like at least take some sarongs with you or dresses

OP posts:
Friendofdennis · 15/03/2025 00:00

I know it’s her choice but I would just say gently that grandparents might not appreciate it or something

Original poster
romma · 14/03/2025 23:58

That’s true she’s old enough to decide but as her mum I feel it’s inappropriate

OP posts:
Jalapenosplease · 14/03/2025 23:58

I'm surprised she wants to flash her bum with extended family there 🤭

Depends on age. If she's 16+ I'd just have a word and say, "if you're hanging out with the wider family, take a sarong" keep it lighthearted.

Hollyhedge · 14/03/2025 23:58

Just tell her you’re not grandma, uncle, cousin want to look at her arse. Then leave it up to her.

HomeworkMonitor · 14/03/2025 23:57

Suggest she holiday alone if she won't compromise and cancel her ticket

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