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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not be a 'holiday person'?

138 replies

GoldfinchFeather · 14/03/2025 13:43

Totally appreciate I could be in the minority with this, but just curious if anyone else feels the same way towards holidays or if there's something wrong with me? 😆

So, the backstory is that this week I had two pieces of good financial news in one day. First, a letter from HMRC saying I'd paid too much tax and they owed me just over £600. The second, an email from my bank saying they were giving me £50.

I was telling a friend about this (not in a boastful way, just joking about how it must be my lucky day etc) and their comment was to me that I should treat myself to a holiday with it.

But the truth is that I haven't been on a 'proper' holiday (in terms of actually going away to another country) since before Covid. Truthfully, I don't really think I'm a 'holiday person'.

For a start, I'm single and of an age where we don't do family holidays anymore (early 30s), so in all likelihood I'd probably only end up going somewhere by myself. Which, if that's your thing, that's fine, but I can only imagine it must be quite lonely when you're in a foreign country.

Secondly, on times I have been away, I've always dreaded the 'going away' part. The faff of packing or going to an airport, then the torturously long journey just to get somewhere, only to do the same thing a few days later when coming home. Does anyone really enjoy that?

Finally, I'm very much a home bird and enjoy my home comforts. I seem to lack the wanderlust/itchy feet that most other people have. Seeing photos of the pyramids is enough for me to know they exist, I don't really feel the need to go see them myself.

Of course, you can never really say any of this to friends in real life, for worry they'll think you're odd/boring/unadventurous (so I'll probably get it in this thread instead). But does anyone else feel similar to me they they just can't be bothered with holidays?

YABU - you're a boring sod and really need to see more of the world
YANBU - you're right, and holidays are too much effort

OP posts:
Bluenotgreen · 14/03/2025 21:14

TheAmusedQuail · 14/03/2025 21:08

I love living abroad and have lived in quite a few different countries. I enjoy other cultures and like to be a daily part of them.

I don't enjoy being a tourist. I hate travel, particularly flying, but also transfers to/from the airport, public transport etc. It is so stressful it completely negates any pleasure a holiday might give. And let's face it, all holidays are very hit and miss. Could be good, could be awful. Out of all the holidays I've been on (used to go regularly until I worked out I wasn't a holiday person) I'd say less than 50% were good.

I don't enjoy being forced to be sociable with other people. I'm not a friendly person. I don't want to look at cultural stuff. I like exploring cultures but it always involves me being dragged by someone else.

If I could magically be teleported to a lovely beach, hotel, food, drinks, peace and quiet, I'd go for it. But that is so far from the experience of travel, that I'll just give it a miss and save my money.

Edited

I just go alone…

bostonchamps · 14/03/2025 21:08

YANBU of course for not going on holiday, that money is yours to use as you'd like.

But. I see this 'travelling is so stressful' all the time on MN. What is everyone getting stressed about? Just pack some fun clothes and...go? Airports are only stressful if you make them, it's really very simple. 99.9% of the population have access to a smartphone and therefore Citymapper, google translate and the general internet. Just bloody go, what's the worst that could happen? (Get insurance for that)

TheAmusedQuail · 14/03/2025 21:08

I love living abroad and have lived in quite a few different countries. I enjoy other cultures and like to be a daily part of them.

I don't enjoy being a tourist. I hate travel, particularly flying, but also transfers to/from the airport, public transport etc. It is so stressful it completely negates any pleasure a holiday might give. And let's face it, all holidays are very hit and miss. Could be good, could be awful. Out of all the holidays I've been on (used to go regularly until I worked out I wasn't a holiday person) I'd say less than 50% were good.

I don't enjoy being forced to be sociable with other people. I'm not a friendly person. I don't want to look at cultural stuff. I like exploring cultures but it always involves me being dragged by someone else.

If I could magically be teleported to a lovely beach, hotel, food, drinks, peace and quiet, I'd go for it. But that is so far from the experience of travel, that I'll just give it a miss and save my money.

Original poster
GoldfinchFeather · 14/03/2025 20:54

FurzeNotGorse · 14/03/2025 17:41

The Peak District is lovely, but it’s not remotely like Iceland, or NYC, or Rwanda or the south of France — there are lots of utterly different versions of ‘lovely’.

Show quote history

I appreciate there are likely far more spectacular places in the world than my good old Peak District - Alaska has been somewhere I've sometimes thought "maybe one day" - similarly Patagonia and New Zealand. But then the thought of the amount of time and effort it'd take to get there dampens my enthusiasm...as others have said, if only someone would hurry up and invent teleportation already, it'd be fantastic!

Even so, I still don't think I'd be off to NYC. Far too busy and peopley, and I've never been a city person.

As for comments about £650 probably getting you very far - I agree. I think my friend's comment was more that I could use it towards a holiday, but I probably phrased that poorly.

OP posts:
Threecraws · 14/03/2025 20:49

I wouldn't agree with either statement for voting but if you not wanting to go on holiday only affects you then of course it's reasonable not to want to go on holiday.

PickledElectricity · 14/03/2025 20:43

I don't think £600 is enough for a decent holiday so YANBU. But it really depends on what you like to do, surely?

I used to go on holiday on my own in my 20s and it was great, I could choose what do to without compromising with anyone else. I once went to Berlin and planned my days around walking to restaurants for lunch/dinner and just seeing whatever happened to be on the way. I was vegan brekkie it went mainstream in the UK so it was a novelty for me. I missed the usual attractions but I did stumble upon the Berlin wall. Everyone was flabbergasted that I didn't see any Anne Frank/holocaust stuff.

My SIL's MIL is a woman who has never left her home town, on purpose, because she's happy at home. She has never visited her grandchildren who live across the country for this reason too. I think it's quite sad but also it's not my life so I don't tend to give it much thought.

Doyouthinktheyknow · 14/03/2025 20:33

Yanbu, you are certainly not alone!

I love holidays and live to go away but I can appreciate not everyone feels the same!

I’d love to feel more content staying at home to be honest, it gets expensive needing to get away😜

RuthW · 14/03/2025 20:26

I hate holidays.

limefruit · 14/03/2025 20:21

I agree, OP. I like going on holiday to nice spa hotels in the UK where I can read and lay about in the pool. I have been on nice holidays abroad, but the ones I have enjoyed the most have largely been centred around relaxing. I have no desire to spend my limited annual leave 'soaking up culture' or seeing how other people live. I am interested in other cultures - reading about their history, speaking to people from other places - but not enough to centre my holidays around it.

ButterCrackers · 14/03/2025 20:11

A holiday at home is my favourite type of holiday.

HazelShark · 14/03/2025 20:09

Im with you completely. Love a few days away in the UK. Can cope with a mini break in Europe.

Otherwise no desire to go on holidays whatsoever! Very happy to just take a week of annual leave and spend it at home and doing day trips locally.

Colleagues think im weird

LlynTegid · 14/03/2025 20:09

Your view is perfectly valid and if you are content with it, that is good. As long as you are getting time away from work as you should.

SwayingInTime · 14/03/2025 20:08

Oh god, me too. I really thought it was just me though.

PollyCreo · 14/03/2025 20:07

Oh I love holidays. I was thinking earlier about how we used to plan holidays in the olden days - traipse down to the travel agents and pick up brochures. Then spend hours at home pouring over the photos and prices until we found the perfect destination. There even used to be a little temperature chart at the bottom of the page. Then back to the travel agents a week later where you'd sit while Linda made some calls and tapped away on her computer to secure the deal.

Happy days 😅

Mummysgogetter · 14/03/2025 19:56

I’m the same OP. I travelled lots from late teens to late 30s - Italy, Tunisia, Egypt, Greece, Turkey, Spain, Lanzarote, Tenerife, Iceland etc. etc. Now, I hate the packing, airport wait and hassle. I also hate leaving my cat and miss my own comfy bed and lovely home. If only I could just press a button and be there and same again to get home, I’m sure I would be a lot more attracted to going.

TheReturnOfFeathersMcGraw · 14/03/2025 19:56

Similar to OP, I live in a place others travel to for it's beauty, and when other people post their 'stunning view' photos from holidays, theyre very underwhelming compared to my daily drive to work.
I would like to see more of the world (I have already travelled a fair bit), and maybe I will one day, but atm I can't be dealing with the hassle of it all. Maybe it's perimenopause, but I need a break to rest when I get back from travelling

babiesinthesnowflakes · 14/03/2025 19:52

I feel exactly the same OP. I don’t really get it! I have colleagues and friends who admit they “live for holidays” and I just can’t imagine what that’s like.

If I won a holiday I’d happily go, but otherwise there are plenty of other things I’d sooner spend the money on.

Cotonsugar · 14/03/2025 19:52

Hhoudini · 14/03/2025 19:49

My friend is obsessed with the fact that I’m not bothered by going abroad. She seems to think it’s because I don’t know what it’s like. I travelled really extensively in my younger years and it was great but I don’t want to do it again. It’s getting to the point where I’m going to have to be really blunt ‘I don’t want to go to Spain and drink cocktails all night in a place where they play English football on the TV, and ‘I don’t want to go and look at how the poor people live in Vietnam from my luxury hotel’.

A week away from it all, camping on the coast with my dog is perfection for me.

“A week away from it all, camping on the coast with my dog is perfection for me.”

This for me as well😊

Cotonsugar · 14/03/2025 19:49

toffeeappleturnip · 14/03/2025 14:49

Seeing photos of the pyramids is enough for me to know they exist, I don't really feel the need to go see them myself.

Exactly. These places are much more magical in my imagination anyway.

In real life places are just full of tourists trudging the same paths as you, shunting along year day after day, year after year, with a souvenir place selling plastic pyramids/ plastic taj mahal's/plastic Mount Fuji's/plastic Ayres rock

I’m a great armchair traveller. All the sights without any of the heat and mosquitoes 😊

Hhoudini · 14/03/2025 19:49

My friend is obsessed with the fact that I’m not bothered by going abroad. She seems to think it’s because I don’t know what it’s like. I travelled really extensively in my younger years and it was great but I don’t want to do it again. It’s getting to the point where I’m going to have to be really blunt ‘I don’t want to go to Spain and drink cocktails all night in a place where they play English football on the TV, and ‘I don’t want to go and look at how the poor people live in Vietnam from my luxury hotel’.

A week away from it all, camping on the coast with my dog is perfection for me.

veganmayo · 14/03/2025 19:36

Why would that be unreasonable? If you don’t want to go on holiday it’s fine not to. I’m very much a holiday person and it’s definitely what I would spend the money on but I don’t think it’s at all weird that you don’t feel that way.

Thepeopleversuswork · 14/03/2025 19:34

I don’t really accept the premise of a “holiday person”, I don’t enjoy package holidays at all and I hate long haul flights but I love travel and particularly love visiting foreign cities.

i think it’s a bit of a shame personally to have never seen anything of the world beyond your shores but each to their own.

PrettayGood · 14/03/2025 19:31

I love holidays but I have a sister who hates them.

(And what kind of holiday is £650 going to buy you? A night in a hotel?)

TiredEyesToday · 14/03/2025 19:30

Suns1nE · 14/03/2025 15:22

I wasn’t a holiday person when with my ex because he made holidays horrible. Now I’m single and I AM going to be brave an go on holiday alone (my kids are grown up now and would rather holiday with their friends than their mum). I did go on one holiday with a friend and it was amazing. Totally different to anything I’d experienced before and that converted me. Sadly (for me and my holidays) my friend is now in a relationship so can’t holiday with me.

Why can’t you go on holiday with your friend now? A relationship doesn’t mean you’re tethered to your partner?!

Nourishinghandcream · 14/03/2025 19:29

We both hate holidays and have never had one other than our honeymoon when we went for 4-nights (happily married 30+ years).
Short trips (2-3 nights) on the other hand are a different matter and we go away every couple of weeks.

Went away in my youth and it is definitely not a money issue, just never had any interest in them.

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