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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the past is being misrepresented on here?

257 replies

ChilliLips · 13/03/2025 21:37

Not all the time obviously but didn’t want a waffly title.

I feel like lately I’m seeing a lot of posts describing a past I don’t recognise. Apparently schools used to be relaxed, have no rules, fewer demands. Whereas I’m sure I remember uniform inspections, SATS, end of year tests, mocks, weekly spelling tests at primary, Saturday detentions, and don’t forget the worst punishment of all - the CHAIR!

I have also seen a few posts saying conditions now are much worse resulting in poorer mental/physical health, hence a spike in disability. But again - can this be true? The world wars wounded, no antenatal tests, jobs like coal mining, loads of smoking/drinking, polio and measles… I’m sure there were a lot of people disabled with conditions they wouldn’t have now.

And finally that everyone was wealthy and lived in massive houses. Nobody I know who grew up in the 50s/60s have tales of luxury, I’ve heard all sorts of horrors including ice on the inside of windows, smog in the air, kids sleeping 4 to a room.

Particularly interested in answers from those alive then! I’m mid 30s.

OP posts:
farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 04:02

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 04:02

Maths?

Not compulsory. Was also not in the UK at the time.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 04:02

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 04:00

Ps.
When I did my Olevels in the early 80s we also had to do maths & english obv plus RS and at one language plus one science subject ( chem, bio or physics )
So quite similar restrictions

We did metalwork, woodwork, environmental science, cooking and needlework. All of which we could take at Olevel. Subjects not seen that much these days I think Whilst other new ones are now available.

Edited

I never had the option to do all those subjects myself but my children have options along those lines and psychology, design technology in different disciplines, computing, more languages, dance and more. I could only have dreamed of that.

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 04:02

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 04:00

I had to do RE in the late 80s/early 90s but it was done as an extra subject for everyone. Only English was compulsory otherwise.

Maths?

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 04:00

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:54

One of mine had to take RE at GCSE plus at least one language and of course maths and English

My other two at a different school only had Maths and English as compulsory but couldn’t do any more than three non facilitating subjects.

Edited

Ps.
When I did my Olevels in the early 80s we also had to do maths & english obv plus RS and at one language plus one science subject ( chem, bio or physics )
So quite similar restrictions

We did metalwork, woodwork, environmental science, cooking and needlework. All of which we could take at Olevel. Subjects not seen that much these days I think Whilst other new ones are now available.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 04:00

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:54

One of mine had to take RE at GCSE plus at least one language and of course maths and English

My other two at a different school only had Maths and English as compulsory but couldn’t do any more than three non facilitating subjects.

Edited

I had to do RE in the late 80s/early 90s but it was done as an extra subject for everyone. Only English was compulsory otherwise.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:58

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:48

Except sometimes it’s easy to repair yourself @farmlife2 and not send it off to landfill
I recently repaired our washing machine ( it must be 15 odd years old ) just by googling and watching how to on youtube.

Plus once an engineer came to look at a washing machine because it wouldn’t drain. He told me I needed a new one. I realised later baby hands had turned off the drain mode

Id also note that if you buy from a good maker they often send you parts for free.
Dualit for example. I’ve also had parts from Kenwood too.

Edited

But then you have to wait for the parts, and that can take several weeks, from experience. Sometimes you can't even get a technician to come and look at it for a couple of weeks. I have a lot of people to wash for and it's a bit of a disaster when a key laundry appliance isn't there.

I currently do have two clothes dryers, which I've never had before. We got a new one the same day the last one broke, then figured we could fix it ourselves (belt needed replacing). It's great to have a back up.

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:54

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:36

Really? I haven't seen that anywhere myself. Hopefully it's unusual.

One of mine had to take RE at GCSE plus at least one language and of course maths and English

My other two at a different school only had Maths and English as compulsory but couldn’t do any more than three non facilitating subjects.

LifeIsShiteEnoughAlready · 14/03/2025 03:53

I have to say, I find the level of political amnesia quite astounding too.

Everything negative is always the Tory's fault and everything positive is always Labour's pride of achievement. Or vice versa depending upon one's own allegiance and whether their chosen party won the last time.

Sometimes your own chosen party did shitty things too. People's ability to remember the "other side" doing what theirs were actually fully responsible for is mind-boggling. Other people's recollections be damned. Documentary evidence...forget about it.

The self-delusion is strong anywhere people get into conversation online though, not just on here.

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:51

HoppingPavlova · 14/03/2025 03:40

Should have added for schools, teachers all smoked in the classrooms. Also, senior students in secondary were allowed to smoke if they wanted at breaks in school grounds. I didn’t but many did as health concerns were not noted then. In fact, Dr’s smoked while doing rounds in hospitals and patients were all allowed to smoke in bed, you had an ashtray beside you. I remember visiting aunties in hospital who had given birth - stayed in for a week back then for a normal birth - and all of them puffing away in the ward. Babies were not bedside but in a dedicated nursery room and were brought in at feed times (to a smoke filled ward, with mum who smelt of smoke). Completely normal as people didn’t know any better.

I’m guessing 50s / 60s ?

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 03:48

KimberleyClark · 14/03/2025 03:32

And the old one ends up in landfill.

Except sometimes it’s easy to repair yourself @farmlife2 and not send it off to landfill
I recently repaired our washing machine ( it must be 15 odd years old ) just by googling and watching how to on youtube.

Plus once an engineer came to look at a washing machine because it wouldn’t drain. He told me I needed a new one. I realised later baby hands had turned off the drain mode

Id also note that if you buy from a good maker they often send you parts for free.
Dualit for example. I’ve also had parts from Kenwood too.

HoppingPavlova · 14/03/2025 03:40

Should have added for schools, teachers all smoked in the classrooms. Also, senior students in secondary were allowed to smoke if they wanted at breaks in school grounds. I didn’t but many did as health concerns were not noted then. In fact, Dr’s smoked while doing rounds in hospitals and patients were all allowed to smoke in bed, you had an ashtray beside you. I remember visiting aunties in hospital who had given birth - stayed in for a week back then for a normal birth - and all of them puffing away in the ward. Babies were not bedside but in a dedicated nursery room and were brought in at feed times (to a smoke filled ward, with mum who smelt of smoke). Completely normal as people didn’t know any better.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:36

jellyfishperiwinkle · 14/03/2025 03:34

And some today find the opposite and there is not the choice of art and creative subjects, their kids have to do several compulsory subjects and there is very little free choice.

Really? I haven't seen that anywhere myself. Hopefully it's unusual.

HoppingPavlova · 14/03/2025 03:35

Yep, so very different in so many ways.

Schools- uniforms and everyone accepted this. There was no ‘strict uniform policy’. Just a uniform and all kids wore it and parents didn’t believe there were any other options. Nothing like today where both parents and kids try and find every excuse around it and call it ‘strict’. Very little misbehaving in class because we had the cane. Funnily, all kids who today ‘must be naughty for (insert 1000 reasons why, but essentially because their being ‘spirited’ is supported by their parents)’ managed to behave adequately when the threat otherwise was a caning. Kids with genuine problems went to dedicated schools, endless places to accomodate, not like now.

Bathrooms- outside bathrooms/toilets were the norm. Our parents/grandparents considered it a luxury to have actual rooms outside, where prior was a bathtub carried in once a week, filled and oldest to youngest in the same water. I remember as a uni student we’d still only shower once a week (if that) in winter as no one wanted to trudge outside and into a freezing bathroom and back. If you lived with guys you also had to hound them into not pissing just outside the back door as they didn’t like to get cold😤. No one ever got sick from this sort of hygiene. It’s only on Mumsnet where the ‘if you don’t take a shower at least once daily you will die’ rubbish is spouted.

I’d change it all in a heartbeat to go back. People had good sense back then. None of the codswallop people carry on with today, of which my kids are equally as guilty.

jellyfishperiwinkle · 14/03/2025 03:34

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:30

One thing that stands out to me is the huge range of subject options my children have compared to me. They have so many. We had a very narrow core of options to choose from.

And some today find the opposite and there is not the choice of art and creative subjects, their kids have to do several compulsory subjects and there is very little free choice.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:34

KimberleyClark · 14/03/2025 03:32

And the old one ends up in landfill.

The company I use reconditions them then sells them on. They make some extra profit this way. They are welcome to it, as it means I don't have to be without a machine.

KimberleyClark · 14/03/2025 03:32

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:16

It's now cheaper to buy a new appliance than to have it repaired. For the small extra cost of a new appliance, they will deliver same or next day, take away the old one and I don't have to wait ages for parts to arrive. Not so 'back then'.

And the old one ends up in landfill.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:30

jellyfishperiwinkle · 14/03/2025 03:28

I think you have no idea unless you have kids in secondary school now how different it is than 30 years ago.

One thing that stands out to me is the huge range of subject options my children have compared to me. They have so many. We had a very narrow core of options to choose from.

jellyfishperiwinkle · 14/03/2025 03:29

Happyinarcon · 14/03/2025 02:38

I have watched the schools change from boring happy and normal to dysfunctional and toxic twice now with the introduction of a new head and deputy head. It’s a real thing happening everywhere

This.

jellyfishperiwinkle · 14/03/2025 03:28

I think you have no idea unless you have kids in secondary school now how different it is than 30 years ago.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:28

CarolinaWren · 14/03/2025 03:20

That's completely relevant though. It's "boomers" that supposedly lived in a utopia when they were growing up, with money coming out of their ears. The reality is that people had lower expectations, were satisfied with a lot less and lived simple lives compared to current times, when many people think they're entitled to have the best of everything.

I'm early 50s and my parents are boomers. There was definitely little money when I was growing up. Except for ciggies. There was always money for ciggies.

CarolinaWren · 14/03/2025 03:20

loadalaundry · 13/03/2025 23:37

I think MNs average age skews a lot older than the media image suggests so posters who are 60 & 70 are giving their experiences which is very different to posters who are much younger.

That's completely relevant though. It's "boomers" that supposedly lived in a utopia when they were growing up, with money coming out of their ears. The reality is that people had lower expectations, were satisfied with a lot less and lived simple lives compared to current times, when many people think they're entitled to have the best of everything.

farmlife2 · 14/03/2025 03:16

KimberleyClark · 14/03/2025 02:20

Houses were more affordable but good furniture was often inherited or made . Clothes were often hand made, knitting and needlework were common skills. Society had a much less 'throw-away' attitude.

This. Things, including electrical equipment, were repaired when they broke, not just thrown away and replaced. I remember sewing up ladders in my school tights.

It's now cheaper to buy a new appliance than to have it repaired. For the small extra cost of a new appliance, they will deliver same or next day, take away the old one and I don't have to wait ages for parts to arrive. Not so 'back then'.

Stirabout · 14/03/2025 02:55

WearyAuldWumman · 14/03/2025 02:22

Yes - Woolie's actually sold tight repair kits.

And @KimberleyClark
my mum use to draw a line on the back of her legs when going out somewhere nice as she couldn’t afford tights

Wheni got a hole in my tights I used clear nail varnish to stop the run.

Happyinarcon · 14/03/2025 02:38

I have watched the schools change from boring happy and normal to dysfunctional and toxic twice now with the introduction of a new head and deputy head. It’s a real thing happening everywhere

WearyAuldWumman · 14/03/2025 02:22

KimberleyClark · 14/03/2025 02:20

Houses were more affordable but good furniture was often inherited or made . Clothes were often hand made, knitting and needlework were common skills. Society had a much less 'throw-away' attitude.

This. Things, including electrical equipment, were repaired when they broke, not just thrown away and replaced. I remember sewing up ladders in my school tights.

Yes - Woolie's actually sold tight repair kits.

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