To want 9s not 7s for my child in their GCSEs?

@SeaSwim5 I’ve never heard of any such research, care to share some?

The longest study into happiness is from Harvard, it’s been going for decades. As far as I know, they don’t attribute happiness to academic success.

YNBU at all. You want the best for your child. Let your child know how proud you are thus far!

Behave will you. When my children were doing GCSEs (at a state school) we were told not to aim for 9s as they were considered to be unattainable. Of course my contrary child promptly got two 9s and all the rest were 8s. It’s not about extended papers etc.

But what you fail to grasp is that these marks have nothing to do with your child’s behaviour, attendance or diligence, but are purely based on how they perform in their exams. Your child can find a cure for cancer in their own spare time, but if they don’t answer the exam questions right, they won’t get good grades. End of.

It's notwhat you want or are capable of. Please lay off with the pressure and leave them to it.

Can you link to some of these studies? I can only find one study of people in their 20s, which agrees with your point but does not specify grades.

I am interested also if there is any evidence that getting 9s is better than getting 7s in terms of later happiness.

This is true. But what matters often is mindset and attitude to work.

Not being that arsed is never high on the ideal candidate list.

I’ve been involved in recruiting hundreds of people to top professional services roles and we definitely take GCSE results into account as part of our application.

I’m definitely more impressed by applicants who’ve pushed themselves at GCSE rather than lazed about and scraped 7s.

It’s not about expecting those grades is it though, it’s the differ between settling and striving.

He’s only in year 10 and working at a 7. He could sit back on his heels and coast and be happy with that, or he could put more effort it and aim for higher.

Exams are unpredictable so you can’t put too much emphasis on results.

Lots of people saying ‘as long as they do their best’ etc. but what if they’re not doing their best?

There’s nothing wrong with instilling a desire to work hard and do as well as you can do.

There seems to be a disingenuous reverse snobbery on here that you shouldn’t encourage your children to push themselves.

That is not the same as expecting things they’re not capable of, or living out parent’s dreams. It’s about valuing effort.

Sit with him a few times and help him with homework. You’ll quickly get a sense of what he’s capable of, then you can decide how much you need/want to do.

You seem sensible, trust your gut. You will make the right decisions.

I’ve spent decades recruiting people to top jobs. Latest was on a salary of £280k.. Without looking it up I couldn’t tell you what his GCSE’s were or his A Levels. Degree 2.1 from an ok university. I could tell you lots about his career in the last fifteen years however.

Your husband is completely wrong. I’ve only worked in mainstream and know loads of pupils who achieved 8s and 9s. A student getting 9s would be like an A** grade in old money. Very academic, good at evaluating their answers. Concise. Familiar with mark schemes and exam technique. It’s not just about being intelligence at this level.

Total nonsense

9’s, 7’s won’t make the slightest difference to their lives. After A levels nobody cares. After degree nobody cares about A levels. After ten years in work nobody cares about degree unless in a professional field where it matters.

How do you know the children are not "striving for 9s"?

Encourage them to do their best by all means but for God's sake don't give them the slightest impression that you "expect" them to achieve 9's......

You can want whatever you want but your children will achieve the results they are willing to study for. Sometimes the results are expected sometimes they aren’t, either way, be happy with their achievements.

They are right to be disappointed if the DC is capable of better!

It is no different to being unhappy that your DC only got a 3 when they could’ve got a 5.

It’s not really a healthy long term outlook though, as all the studies show that better GCSE grades = higher happiness in later life.

Even if you haven’t explicitly said anything, she will pick up on your attitude. Kids pick up on everything not matter how hard you try to hide it.

How incredibly sad that parents are disappointed with a mixture of 7s 8s and 9s.

YABVU

Firstly these are your child’s exams, not yours. And their life, don’t blur the boundaries.

I hope you are aware of the mental health crisis that this generation are going through? Partly to blame is this culture and pressure to achieve top grades.

GCSE grades are just a stepping stone to the next stage and are soon forgotten about. If a child wants to push themselves to achieve higher than what’s needed that’s up to them. But personally I’d love to see more students taking a more relaxed approach to their studies and a healthier long term outlook.

You don’t mention if they’re happy, healthy have a good friendship group sleep well

No, a 7 is benchmarked at the lower end at the old A. A 7 is not a B/A, it’s a low A.

An 8 is the upper end of A/lower end of A. 9 is the higher end of the old A.

OP, it’s fine to encourage and support, but not to push. If your DC understands that you’re expecting very high grades you will do them some serious damage if they don’t get them.

It's not about you and your wants! They will do their best no doubt and if that's not a 9, it's not a 9.

What are you talking about, of course state school children get 9's and their isn't a private school gcse exam paper. Those 2 facts are true.

There are a number of videos on YouTube and TikTok of year 11s who got all 9s giving advice, so the guidance is there for those who want it.

Here are a few for those whose DC aren’t content with mediocrity😉:

Henry Brand- what has getting all 9s done for me?

Henry Brand 2

Udoka Fintelmann

JSPark

My husband is like this, he thinks daughters predicted grades are amazing, mixture of 7's 8's and 9's. I am a bit more yes well done but they should be that, I got 4 a's and b's you should really be better than me, and I had also difficult home life. He didn't do any revision at all in school ,and got poor results, he could have done a lot better. I worked hard so I think that shapes your thoughts. Both her best friends are predicted 9's across the board. She's at a grammar. Obviously neither of us have shared any of these thoughts with her!