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Original poster

Is this a bit harsh on a 3 year old?

161 replies

Cordswain · 13/03/2025 09:31

I’m trying to make sense of some aspect of my childhood.

When I was around 3 I can remember being very distressed and screaming n the house. My mother was actually out in the garden and she came back in saying in a very cold voice:

”Stop this. It’s ridiculous screaming for your mum”

Just for context my mum was a career woman who went back to work full time after I was born - I was an only child so felt isolated

AIBU for thinking it’s harsh on a 3 year old?

OP posts:
Iwishiwasapolarbear · 13/03/2025 09:55

Totally depends on why you were screaming. And you probably both have different memories of it.

why have you mentioned she worked full time? Many mothers have to

SJM1988 · 13/03/2025 09:54

More context is needed.
There is a massive difference between screaming because you are hurt / didn't know where she was or screaming because she was outside and you didn't want to go out to her.

HeyDoodie · 13/03/2025 09:51

What’s the bigger picture? A well loved child given lots of parental time - this comment is daft to make but mum may have been at the end of her tether. A neglected child crying out for love and attention, this comment is quite symbolic

SapphireOpal · 13/03/2025 09:48

"Just for context my mum was a career woman who went back to work full time after I was born - I was an only child so felt isolated"

I'm not really sure what this is supposed to mean tbh. Presumably you were in childcare if your mum was working, so not "isolated"? Or do you mean your mum was emotionally unavailable, which I don't think has anything to do with her working?

SwingTheMonkey · 13/03/2025 09:46

Same as above - absolutely impossible to say without any context. Also, lots of women go back to work full time after they have children and there’s nothing wrong with that. This feels rather like an exercise in wracking one’s brain to find examples of your mother being a bad parent.

SemperIdem · 13/03/2025 09:44

As others have said, context is key here.

HereintheloveofChristIstand · 13/03/2025 09:43

Agree with the above. If you were screaming because you were frightened or in pain, this is very harsh. If you were having a tantrum because you had been told NO, totally justified.
And it is normal for women to go back to work full time. Money doesn't grow on trees.

Original poster
Cordswain · 13/03/2025 09:43

Ok thank you all for taking the time to respond

OP posts:
wherearemypastnames · 13/03/2025 09:41

Without the context we can never say

Lyannaa · 13/03/2025 09:39

OldChairMan · 13/03/2025 09:38

It is harsh, but it's probably not a topic for AIBU. I'd report your post and get it moved to Relationships or Mental Health. There's usually a load of dicks lurking on AIBU just waiting to lay into any sign of vulnerability.

I agree

OldChairMan · 13/03/2025 09:38

It is harsh, but it's probably not a topic for AIBU. I'd report your post and get it moved to Relationships or Mental Health. There's usually a load of dicks lurking on AIBU just waiting to lay into any sign of vulnerability.

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