I think my son is gay

So you think he is conflicted between his emotions and his faith?
Perhaps you can find a priest who has a more relaxed view- surely there must be some gay priests out there.

What a shame the poor kid has been indoctrinated into this religion. Surely you can't be blaming it all on your sister? It sounds like he might be too terrified not to believe in it now. My ex husband was the same and it ruined both our lives when he thought he had to be straight and married me. I dread to think of the trauma this is causing your son.

A very close friend of mine, who is in an openly gay marriage is being received into the Catholic church at Easter.

Could you bring up how much more accepting the Catholic church is now - perhaps starting with a general discussion about the Pope s current health issues, and then steer the conversation towards the article that someone linked upthread?
You could maybe say that you read something online & are so pleased that the church is much more inclusive these days.

I was brought up Catholic too - it was only when I went to Uni and found my own mind I realised how fucked up some of it was. My own Mother was ostracised because her husband left her for another woman but instead of being supported she was told she would always be married in the eyes of God and was never allowed to move on.

I'd stop attending Mass tbh and let your son know everything was OK.

Agree with this. I was brought up a Catholic but discarded it because I personally find it a horrible, judgemental religion which can ruin you because of the guilt they drum in to you from a young age. I don’t like any religions and my children were not exposed to it. Your son’s anxiety is because of this pesky religion.

He might have a rethink as he’s older, it’s all made up anyway.

Just one of the many, many reasons religion is shit.

Did you read the OP's post?

Your son isnt the problem, your family and church are. They're the ones that need to learn about treating people with respect. And if you are truly going to support your son, you need to be prepared to ditch them if attitudes don't change.

Make it very clear that you abhor homophobia in any religion and God loves everyone.

I left Christianity after finding so much about it was not loving and I’m so glad I did.

Why hell is more fun!

This Daniel Foxx is great. I love the idea of a Hell with George Michael cocktail parties.

Do you have a male partner/husband? It may be worth thinking about if you raise your concerns with him only if you feel he would be supportive? Try to find opportunities (or engineer them!) to discuss aspects of the religion. Or issues relating to sexual orientation, it will give you an opportunity to input your stance on this and may help him to feel that he would have your support (and ideally immediate family) Well done you anyway for picking up on this, my son told me he was dating another young man, who he had recently introduced as "a friend" I gave him a hug and said how pleased I was for him. He took a while before he wanted to disclose to my husband etc. Felt a bit sad when he told me he had been aware of these feelings since age 14yrs.

It's one of reasons I'm no longer practicing it was the sheer hypocrisy telling people it was sin to act upon their feelings of attraction to a same sex person
Paticularly when you think of all the atrocities the Catholic clergy have committed thst got brushed aside.

Could be worse, he could be a paedophile like many in the Cathomic church.

Yes this.

Ensure he knows that you'd accept him, love him, whatever his sexuality.

Are there any support groups for gay Catholics or other gay Christian groups you could get in touch with?

If the son's praying, it seems he believes in and practices the religion, regardless of whether other family members do. What OP does is unlikely to have much impact on what he believes.

Just be there to support him, whatever he might be going through.

If he is gay, then you may not believe yourself to be homophobic but by continuing to associate with an organisation which has incredlibly backwards views is not going to help, and would have doubtless contributed in a huge manner towards how he feels. If you want to help him, you need to leave the catholic church and all it's bullshit completely behind.

This. Big piece of info missing from the OP

Surely his reaction isn’t a surprise when you chose to make sure he felt that way due to the upbringing you chose to give him. Its also odd to claim you aren’t homophobic, yet choose to be part of a huge homophobic organisation.