Would you judge a 26 year old (mum of 2) who casually sleeps with someone who is 18?

It’s MN, the home of sanctimony and judgement - what did you expect? You can’t move for pearls rolling round the floor.

My thoughts exactly!

When I was 16 I dated someone of 28. It was all very innocent as his mother knew mine and there might have been ructions if not. It was very good for me, we went to nice pubs and out for meals with his friends and their partners which was very much more civilised than what I did when out with friends of my own age.

It’s MN, the home of sanctimony and judgement - what did you expect? You can’t move for pearls rolling round the floor.

I wouldn’t judge, no. I’m surprised at the strong reactions here. Gross? Really?

All very earnest Im sure, but the vast majority of us have had and enjoyed casual sex, since the advent of time, we are sexual beings as humans, we are driven by sex.

Its not for you to say whether something that is between 2 consenting adults and affects no one else is right or wrong, its up to them.

When I was 29 I slept with a 20 year old. We were both single. No kids. Am I disgusting also?

No, not particularly, not unless she had some kind of authority through work etc. But it looks like I am in a minority!

Yes

Depends. I was 18, met husband when he was 25. I was working and had my own flat. There wasn't a massive difference in maturity, to be honest. We are still together 32 years on.

OP not been back? Funny that

Yes, definitely!!

Nice to see OP has come back 🙄

This ... ^ it's like the woman I know (that's joined on to a semi detached house next to a friend of mine.) She's 34, and got a 4 year old daughter and has got her own home, and a job, and she's got a 19 year old 'boyfriend' living with her, who presents more like 14. He can't even grow facial hair. He doesn't look up when he's walking. He doesn't speak to you, (because he has developed no social skills yet as he has never worked.) He's got no job. He can't drive. He just goes around on a push bike. He just mows the lawn for her, and walks the dog occasionally, and smokes pot all day ...

He is literally got the 'maturity' levels of somebody who's in year 9 at school. He hangs around with 14 to 16 year olds - yet she is in her mid 30s with a 4 year old daughter ... Everything about it is just so wrong. It's absolutely grim ... He should be with a 16 to 18 year old girl. not a grown ass woman in her mid 30s, with bills and a mortgage, and who left school nearly 20 years ago. (And as I said, she has a small child.)

And as I said in my earlier post, I genuinely worry about the 4 year old daughter, with the amount of men she has coming and going, some who have actually lived with her (as this lad does,) and the fact they spend half their waking hours smoking pot and necking Special Brew and Tennents Super. (She has had this current lad living with her for 4 months, and she's only known him for 5 months!)

Yes I'm judgy and nosey. So what?

Yep, this. ^

Every 18 year old I know, for a start. And I've known a huge amount of them.
The actually adulting 18 year olds are massively outnumbered by the still kids 18 year olds.

Ugh, yes.

Very true. Most are like that even at 18-19. (Still awkward, and very teenager-like with very few adulting life skills.) As I said, many are still at school at 18 FFS! Why are people trying to make out they are capable of buying their own home, starting a flourishing career, and travelling the world on their own, and doing fully functioning adulting at 18-19? Of course they're not. Daft. 🙄

You always get the 'Not My Jimothy's' on threads like this. Their Jimothy rowed alone across the Atlantic when he was 12! 😂

@Devonshiregal

• 17 year olds - can raise kids, live alone and be fully adult.
• 19 year olds - can’t look after themselves at all.

I have literally never seen anybody say that 17 year olds can raise kids, live alone, and be fully adult.

And yeah, many 19 year olds WILL struggle to live alone/be alone/look after their own place, pay bills or rent or mortgage, and live like a fully functioning adult. They have only just left school then! (And you can't include being at Uni, because that's not real life/real adulting.)

err no because they're BOTH adults and it's none of my business

Find something else to do Judgy McJudgy

I can read and understand a comment. It’s still a silly generalisation. I mean, what’s the sample?

It's not..she said many, not all. Many are exactly like that.

Many 18 year olds are still like children, not fully grown yet mentally or physically in some cases, and it's gross for anyone over 25-30 to be 'dating' anyone who is in their teens, even if it's 17, 18, or 19.

Come on, that’s a bloody daft generalisation about 18 year olds.

Yes

My son is 18 and barely more than a kid. Yes i would judge.

You say it's nobody's business but theirs, if they are past the age of consent, and 'two consenting adults.'

But people are still entitled to judge - and think it's grim. Many 18 year olds are still like children, not fully grown yet mentally or physically in some cases, and it's gross for anyone over 25-30 to be 'dating' anyone who is in their teens, even if it's 17, 18, or 19.

16 is the age of consent to shag, do you think it's OK for a 16 year old to be in a relationship with someone in their 30s/40/50s, because they are 'of the age of consent?' REALLY?! A 16 year old is still at school FGS! Age of consent need upping to fucking 20, to stop people a generation or more older going for them because they are 'legal.' 🙄

Some posts on this thread are grim af!