Living alone is tough financially

Even if you are sharing living space though, you don't have the financial fallback of living as a couple. If you lose your job (or as a self-employed person, work dries up) you are still responsible for your share of the costs. Not so if you are living together as a couple.

Being self-employed, I can't claim benefits if my work dries up, I have to rely on savings. It's difficult to save when you are on your own, especially if clients are tardy about paying invoices or cancel work last minute, which can make financial planning tricky.

I have older DC, at university, one living full-time with their dad. I pay maintenance for the younger one and financially support the older one (because their dad doesn't, even though their Dad is much better off than me). Also, if I took in a lodger, there would be no space for DC when they come here (because a lodger would need their own room, unlike a partner), so the dc wouldn't be able to stay.

I'm in a very fortunate position in comparison to many, but the lack of a safety net is concerning at times.

Can you really not see that you living with your husband is different to living with multiple strangers? The only thing you have in common with them is all being single with low-medium incomes? Does your husband know that you consider living with him to be the equivalent to living with a stranger?

I would love to share my space with a husband, I just haven't been lucky enough to find one. I haven't chosen to be single.

Please quote the posts where people are complaining that singles with no dependents are the "hardest done by of all". Because I've read the full thread and haven't seen this anywhere. Just singles with no dependents pointing out that it can be difficult, especially in cases of I'll heath or job loss.

I don't think it is a ridiculous suggestion. I know many people not in a relationship who happily share spaces for the financial benefit. Almost all sharing with a friend or relative, but a few who took a lodger that was initially a stranger. They all seem happy enough to trade off their luxury of exclusive occupation for the financial (and possibly also social) benefits that sharing brings.

(I'm not talking student househare style. More siblings buying a property together, friends renting a 2 bed/2 bath flat between them, single person taking in a lodger in the spare room scenario.)

But obviously, no one has to share if they don't want to. But the choice to have the luxury of a whole exclusive property to yourself comes at a higher cost than being in a shared space with another financially independent adult to share the costs with.

I was a single parent, DC are adults now. I would say the ways in which that helped me were yes I did get SH. I was also able to study while claiming benefits which helped me get into a training role, where I was then topped up by WTC. Which meant that by the time I would have lost all benefits, I was earning a decent wage.

I’m not a high earner, work in the public sector, but I’m comfortable. However, all the help I had just isn’t available now. SH is like gold dust. There’s now the requirement to be working from when your child is 3 so far more limited opportunities to study, both from a time and financial perspective. So I think single parents have it much harder now.

That said, adult DS lives here and contributes financially as it just doesn’t make financial sense for him to move out. He’s ND and doesn’t want a relationship. I’m just done with relationships so don’t want one either now! If he moved out I probably would get a lodger as I could manage the bills alone but I want to have some disposable income too. Likewise for him, moving out would be a lot more expensive than what he pays me.

I hadn’t envisioned living with DS at this point. But this way we both have a nice life rather than struggling individually. Luckily we get on well!

And unless you are disabled, do your own decorating.

You can insure against this with income protection and redundancy insurance. But on the plus side you don't need life insurance to benefit dependents unless you are a single parent.

I live alone and find it cheaper.
I rent not own.

Absolutely you can't plan for every occasion. And I do a agree that children don't stop having overheads when they get to 18yrs especially at 18yrs. The benefit cut off is a huge issue that we don't talk about. Women who have stepped back or gone part time while there exes have carried on to forge great careers. But that does need to change and single parents need the same options.

I do think that as a parent of a DD and a mum who has had to do it by myself that I will be advising my daughter every step of the way to get her career in place before she gets married and has children, and to keep working even if it's just part time when she does have children so she has an escape route out if she needs it and her own money. I wouldn't want her to do have my life.

It’s particularly hard when you get older eg nearing retirement age. I was made redundant and have found it hard to get another job in the same field and even harder to get a different job (ageism/over qualified.) I have a small pension. My couple friends are fine as they are living off two pensions or one can retire earlier than the other and one can work or go part-time.

But you know that’s a completely ridiculous suggestion. It isn’t one that’s reasonable in the slightest. Living in a house share is no fun past the age of about 25, and besides, owning property is a sensible long term plan.

It isn’t even a ‘complaint’, as I see it to be honest: more an observation. I know so many people who just never think about this topic because they have never lived alone. My dad always used to complain about my not having any money - he had no idea how expensive living alone was!

That I disagree with. Single person, no dependents are doing fine.

A ridiculous generalisation. I may as well say single parents claiming benefits (child benefit, housing benefit, income top-up) are all doing fine, when clearly they're not. It's also easier to get social housing when you have dependents, cheaper costs than privately renting and that security of having that roof over your head for the rest of your life. The only people that are all doing fine are the people with small outgoings and large disposable incomes, and they're in all 'groups'.

But the very simple solution for people complaining that they don't get the financial advantages of shared spaces, is that they too could share spaces.

I'm not being bossy or saying that people have to share spaces. I'm simply saying you can't choose to not share a space, and then complain that you don't get the financial advantages that sharing a space brings.

Yes, which is fine. All I'm saying is that it's possible to foresee and plan for that, but then fate throws curveballs (in my case a pandemic and dying parent) that prevent those plans from coming to fruition.

And as a single person you have absolutely no safety net or access to help, regardless of how hard you've tried or what fate have thrown your way.

Also @mrsm43s - yes a single person may have more earning opportunities than a couple raising a child/children.

Many of us mid life singletons have already done that and we're not going to magically morph into high earning career women overnight when those kids fly the nest.

As for only one set of expenses, sure, on the daily that's true, but a kid at uni (even one with full loans that has worked since she was 16 and is good at managing her money) comes with costs...getting them kitted out for Halls in year one, additional bits and pieces for year 2 moving into a shared house, countless 200 mile round trips to and from on occasions where she needs to bring more stuff home or the trains are screwed, not to mention the lengthy holiday (which are lovely but it's still more expense) and having to help her with covering double rent as there's a crossover between Year 2 and 3 houses, trying to help her out by paying her car insurance and contact lens scheme every month...

Yes, it's my choice to do some of that...just like it's her father's choice to rarely put his hand in his pocket now he doesn't have to...but what decent parent wouldn't do that?

@mrsm43s

No, no one said they are the hardest done by of all.

The thread title is just ‘living alone is tough financially.’

I don’t think I’m the only one bewildered by your bossy insistence that this is not the case; it’s because single people are petulantly unreasonable in demanding their own homes to live in.

I live alone and got income protection insurance for that very reason.

Single parents have it hard, I agree.

But this thread was about singles with no dependents complaining that they are the hardest done by of all because they can't share costs (whilst also refusing to share spaces.)

That I disagree with. Single person, no dependents are doing fine. They have the option to share spaces if they wish to share costs, they have access to benefits without someone else's income being taken into account, and they only have themselves to support out of their salary.

If there was to be any change to the taxation system, I'd suggest an additional tax-free allowance per dependent child (which would obviously benefit single parents). But the idea that single people without dependents should get tax breaks just because they are single is preposterous, but seems to be what some single people are suggesting.

Single person living alone here.

Recently divorced colleague who's now living alone: "How do you cope with just one income, everything is so expensive for one!"

Well, yes 🙄😂welcome to the real world

With the greatest of respect I left an extremely abusive relationships 11yrs ago, I know all about choice and how hard doing it alone is. I also ended up volunteering for a local DV charity and met many women who are dependant on benefits. I don’t think coming off benefits for anyone is easy, and applaud anyone for trying but the stark reality is the goverment make it very clear not more support after school.

Feminists campaigned for years for individual tax rates. Would be a very socially regressive step for a woman's tax rate to be determined by her husband's income.

I don't agree with being taxed as households but seriously, what is it with trying to make it look like single people, by virtue of being single, are living some kind of luxurious, amazing lifestyle?! Hell yeah, some kind of tax break for single income households would be amazing. Sure as hell take the pressure off.for.those with children. Why is that a bad thing? Remove the need for UC, perhaps?

Because there are no single income households supporting children, are there?

My sole income supports 4. You make it sound like single income households are some kind of luxury.

Yup I have 3 young children 100% of the time too and it's brutal. CMS has stopped as ex husband has been made redundant and made no effort to get a new job. I planned ahead when I divorced and did take out redundancy insurance which gives me a certain peace of mind but all the DIY / breakages / car repairs always seem to come at once and just as I've paid off one credit card bill for say the washing machine breaking then something else breaks or school announces a ridiculously over priced school trip

Some days I feel like a strong independent woman with my shit together and feel proud of what I've achieved in living alone....and then other days I just sit and cry

I planned.

At the beginning of 2020 when my daughter was 15 and in year 10, I was working term time only.

I registered an expression of interest for the training pathway of a police staff job with better money whilst training and the potential to double my income over the next few years and career progression after that too.

Then Covid hit...and 10 days later my dad was put on the end of life pathway, where I cared for him for 15 months until he passed away because we were terrified of him going into a home at that time.

My employer was awful...I was forced to take an unpaid sabbatical for 9 months. I went back the following September with the intention of getting my ducks in a row and moving on the following year (2022). But the impact of what I'd been through in Covid basically caused me to have a breakdown and within a month I was signed off and ultimately diagnosed with cPTSD.

After some time out I started doing some freelance work, topped up by the benefits I was entitled to as I had a child at home, and some financial help from my mum, which I was extremely lucky to have.

I was also applying for full time work but without success. I finally got a zero hours contract doing evening lettings at a local school which led to my current full time role there, which I absolutely love, but even doing both jobs it's a struggle.

As I've said, I'm now studying to try and increase my career options and earning potential but that's not going to happen overnight.

Oh and BTW I'm single in the first place as a result of leaving an emotionally abusive relationship before anyone tries to tell me that's also a choice.

Had we not had an inheritance from my uncle just before Covid, I'd have been on the bones of my arse.

No, I am saying that tax should be on a household income as UC is. So all households on the same income pay the same tax, regardless of whether there is one earner or two.