Living alone is tough financially

You need to give your detailed income and expenditure for anyone to have an opinion. I'm in a relationship and could easily afford the expenditure if I was single.

I am long term single. I am better off than a single parent trying to support children and not able to work full time. I am significantly worse off than a couple who each earn half my wage. The taxation system makes damn sure of that. Happily I am able to work in a poorer part of the country, making housing costs more affordable.

You don’t have to be in a relationship to live with another person or persons. You can be a lodger, or do a house share. That may be beneath you, but that’s a choice.

Thanks for clarifying. You sound a bit bitter.

im not easily offended but some of your comments were borderline and with your further detail now im fucked off.

I have my wage to support me and only me yes. You had your wage to support your husband and the children you had out of choice. You worsened your financial position by choice.

it would be irresponsible for me, single, all the wage to just me, to now choose to have children and a) not be able to make ends meet and b) to not be able to give me child(ren) a quality of life I’d like them to have.

your comments are so ignorant. “To support little old you” in my situation I was with someone sharing all bills, he left due to abuse, now all bills are for me, but for my own wellbeing and safety I’m now doing it alone.

you had it tough, I’m not disputing that but please don’t make out like you had it worse than everyone else. There’s even people worse than me on my own, on the streets for example.

it’s all relative, yes you may not have had any additional help ( I don’t either because unemployed with kids seems to be the qualifier) but back in the day, mortgages, rents, cost of living, poll tax was less.

please try to not think you are the only person that has / had it hard. Most of us are a wage slip away from the streets!

I wasn't saying you were lying about the sahp bit. Read again. It's about the NHS care.
And why should a child of two immigrant parents get the same as a British citizen? Isn't the healthcare and the education enough?

I'm single and live alone, previously was a single parent. Definitely had more coming in financially as was eligible for WTC and CB, obviously had my Dd to pay for too. As a DD has now flown the nest finances are super tight, and that's with working more OT and pay rises.

Do I want to move into a house share whilst I'm approaching 50? Erm, no not really! 😅 I don't want to snag myself a man just to help out with the bills either.

Love this expression "like flying business class, it's expensive but definitely worth it"!

And, I hear you, OP.

I rent, so don't have the worry of paying for a new roof or boiler, etc, but I am working 2 jobs, working 7 days a week and trying to save as much as I can to get a deposit together so I can buy somewhere on my own.

I've been married, I've done flatshares. I'm done with both!

In this past week, I also applied for a 3rd job because clearly I'm out of my mind 🙃

It is hard for sure, but fuck me. Living with a violent man was so much harder and every time I read threads on here about the terrible relationships that other ladies are in - living with an awful, abusive man - I shudder because I know what it's like and how difficult it is to extricate yourself. Even when I'm bone tired, no part of me would consider for a second, to swap my expensive solo life for what I had - you could offer me a billion pounds and I'd say no thanks.

Have you tried meditation?

How else to respond to people calling me a liar- like you have done? Like you’re up for a sensible discussion. When you start name calling, you have indicated you are not interested in a sensible discussion.

Surely this thread is just suggesting that living alone comes with difficulties. Complete financial independence can be scary. Food packaging having two portions can be annoying.

Why does it need to be a competition of who is the worst off? Why are people who live alone not allowed to complain? There’s plenty of space for single parents etc to complain on here, and no one begrudges them it. Life can be bloody hard no matter your circumstances.

Rich you call me unpleasant but then accuse me of “lying”. My spouse was a SAHP for 15yrs, this is not a lie. It is the truth. Ask other parents of kids with SEN how easy it is to have dual incomes back when the govt provided no free childcare and no subsidies. Even today, a child of immigrants doesn’t get the same as a British child.

So instead of having a sensible discussion @SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice
would rather just respond with laughing emojis on people's post. Like I said, an unpleasant person.

I think it's a shame you didn't go for the house share option @SugarandSpiceandAllThingsNaice . You would have been fun to be around in the morning. Or any time!

No. Immigrants don’t get child benefit. NRPF.
by the time I could claim it having ILR, they were too old (over 12)

Are you always so unpleasant? At least stop lying. Your children at least will be getting their opticians and dental care on the NHS so you aren't paying 4 sets of those. You're buying the school uniforms and additional food because you chose to have children. I did not chose to be single. I would love to be married but unlike you, I haven't been lucky enough to find a decent man who wants to marry me. Oh, and if you are buying school uniform them your children are school age and your spouse can go out to work and bring in a second income. You don't have to rely on 1 income, that again is a choice you are making. Must be nice to have that luxury.

I think people are saying people shouldn't be punished for leaving an abusive relationship or becoming a widow. Living alone is very rarely a choice it's usually unfortunate circumstances

So what are you suggesting? That single people should be subsidised and get all the benefits of living alone without any compromise from their expectations?

Nothing at all? Not even child benefit?

I totally agree OP. The cost of living alone is so high and although it sounds like a luxury, it feels like a necessity once you reach a certain age. I know people who are in their 40s/50s and renting on their own but couldn't face sharing, which is understandable. Rent, bills, food - it's all pricey on your own. Houses are expensive to maintain and flats often come with high maintenance fees. All very costly.

Ha ha ha ha ha
NRPF= zero benefits

Well, I had one husband and two children. Both with SEN.
Working in the public sector and paying rent.

Not a high earner with an established mortgage.

Of an older generation where we had
zero maternity pay or leave
zero childcare hours for free or subsidised
not eligible for child tax credit (NRPF immigrants)
no family/grandparents to help

I’m not bitter, I just think some privileged people don’t realise it is a privilege to have your wage only need to support little old you by yourself and no one else to be responsible for.

I live alone. I don't really know any different. I do know I can't afford to spend lots on clothes or holidays, but it's not like I can't afford any clothes or holidays, I'll just more likely buy less or second hand, and go abroad for 5 days rather than 10 days. It would be nice to split bills, that would be a saving of £150-£200 a month.

I think for me it's less financial (although cost of a hotel room for one is annoying!) and more just having someone to be cosy with now and then.

I have a shared ownership flat which is nice for security - if I couldn't pay the rent for a few months they wouldn't kick me out (as long as there was a plan!). Also there's a residents WhatsApp group and we're a friendly bunch - lending out parking to each other and such. It doesn't feel isolated. I do have to pay maintenance which everyone complains enormously about but I don't mind as it means I never have to think about servicing the boiler or some major leak in a roof or anything.

The only other disadvantage (I had health situation which meant biological children didn't happen) is feeling like I wanted a career break but sabbaticals are more common now and so is people taking a few months off. I agree that being a single parent is potentially more of a hardship and harder work. Defo see that with friends.

I'm early 40s now and I think it gets easier when you start to count blessings.

@Ineffable23

Agreed. Imagine sharing a bathroom with housemates who don't speak English.

But you and the adult you live with would be getting benefits, presumably? On top of your wage.

But do they have it worse 🤔 I'd be a lot poorer if I didn't have my kids as I wouldn't be entitled to any benefits. Just like a pp whose £800 a month worse off now her daughters an adult. Single people do get screwed over you can't deny that