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Is this rude if you were a guest?

317 replies

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:36

If you were a guest in someone's house and they went up to bed without saying goodnight or telling you they were going to bed/not coming back downstairs would you think that was rude?

OP posts:
Dodgyshoulder · 07/03/2025 23:51

This is so rude. I would get the impression that they didn’t want me there or they were just so tired. Probably the former.

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:51

I'm just wondering whether I should say something tomorrow

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Poppyseeds79 · 07/03/2025 23:51

I'd just go up to bed as well. Just say in the morning you hoped you hadn't kept them up last night? They probably just felt awkward in case you'd think they meant you had to go to your room too.

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:50

POTC · 07/03/2025 23:49

My autistic teen and my not mine but lives with us autistic teen would both do this so I probably wouldn't think anything of it!

They are not autistic

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JonesTheSteam · 07/03/2025 23:50

Who are the people you are staying with? Do you know them well?

rockingbird · 07/03/2025 23:49

Very strange not to mention rude, find somewhere else to stay from tomorrow.

POTC · 07/03/2025 23:49

My autistic teen and my not mine but lives with us autistic teen would both do this so I probably wouldn't think anything of it!

ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:48

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:47

Yes!

That’s very odd. Even if they hadn’t gone to bed, that would be strange.

Are these friends? Relatives? Your parents? Are they usually a bit strange?

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:48

FrogsLoveRain · 07/03/2025 23:47

How long ago was it?

How are you sure they're not coming back down?

Like your username BTW! Love frogs

OP posts:
Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:47

FrogsLoveRain · 07/03/2025 23:47

How long ago was it?

How are you sure they're not coming back down?

Probably about an hour ago. Yes it's very clear they have gone to bed.

OP posts:
FrogsLoveRain · 07/03/2025 23:47

How long ago was it?

How are you sure they're not coming back down?

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:47

ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:46

I don’t understand. You were all sitting together and they, one by one, just got up and silently left?

Yes!

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beencaughttrollin · 07/03/2025 23:46

Did they show you your room and get you settled in when you arrived (putting your bags in the room, making sure you know where the loo is, etc.)? If so I think you can go to sleep with a good conscience and see how things look in the morning.

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:46

pippapipps · 07/03/2025 23:45

I think it's very rude and very odd and if I was you I'd be making my excuses and leaving ASAP tomorrow morning
Very strange and very awkward for you op

I might but it's taken me hours to get here, I've taken time off work, organised childcare and pet care....

OP posts:
OlderGlaswegianLivingInDevon · 07/03/2025 23:46

Clearly they go to bed earlier, was there no hints given re their bedtime / being tired / suggesting you are tired after your journey etc.

ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:46

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:45

Nothing!

I don’t understand. You were all sitting together and they, one by one, just got up and silently left?

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:45

ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:45

What did they say as they were going upstairs?

Nothing!

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Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:45

steff13 · 07/03/2025 23:44

I'm all seriousness, that's the craziest thing I've heard in a while.

Take their car for a joyride.

I honestly just feel uncomfortable and a bit sad. And worried that I've done something but I'm going over the evening and I can't think of any time I could have said or done something that has upset someone.

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ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:45

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:42

3 people in living room. One went upstairs and never came back down. The other went upstairs and never came back down. Person remaining realises everyone has now gone to bed.

What did they say as they were going upstairs?

Onlyvisiting · 07/03/2025 23:45

Its rude and strange.
But I'd wonder if maybe they were tired of waiting for you to go to bed, normal manners would dictate that you go to be at or before their usual time I think.
Are you sure you didn't miss any hints? Very strange though, as if that was the case then I'd expect them to make the going to bed routine really obvious in the the hope you would catch on!

Mumsntfan1 · 07/03/2025 23:45

Who are the people you're staying with? Do you know them well?

pippapipps · 07/03/2025 23:45

I think it's very rude and very odd and if I was you I'd be making my excuses and leaving ASAP tomorrow morning
Very strange and very awkward for you op

steff13 · 07/03/2025 23:44

I'm all seriousness, that's the craziest thing I've heard in a while.

Take their car for a joyride.

Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:43

steff13 · 07/03/2025 23:40

Take this opportunity to rifle through their things and eat all their snacks?

I feel so uncomfortable. Honestly I feel like I shouldn't be here now and I'm hundreds of miles from home.

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Britishsummertime22 · 07/03/2025 23:42

ForZanyAquaViewer · 07/03/2025 23:40

How did this happen? Were you all sitting together, and they just up and left? They went to the loo and never came back? Details, please.

3 people in living room. One went upstairs and never came back down. The other went upstairs and never came back down. Person remaining realises everyone has now gone to bed.

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