Time to call out shit parenting!

I am so glad someone started this thread. I was listening to Kinnock bleating on about schools teaching kids to brush their teeth on the BBC this morning. What exactly is parents role in bringing up their OWN children? Lazy, feckless, couldnt care less. Every excuse under the sun.

It also makes me think of the shoplifting tsanemi. People steal not because they are hungry but because they can, no one will stop them, security guards wont do anything and the poor staff. I used to work in retail myself a number of years ago. No way would I want to do it now. The stealing will get more and more blanant and will almost definitely turn into violence if someone tries to stop them. Then the bleeding hearts will say they had no choice, poor souls, bad parenting or the catch all excuse for a lot of bad behaviour or when people have been caught out 'mental health issues'

Is there a poverty aspect to this - are struggling parents les likely ? Because all humans only have so much effort to give to life. Is there a mental health aspect - struggling parents can't face the it ?

There is absolutely no excuse for children not brushing teeth or drinking water.

I'm sorry but some people should not be parents.

My child has this, she's had to have seven crowns fitted. She's had a lot of ear infections as a baby, actually ended up with grommets. It has really made me feel like a shit parent and I know other people judge me. We are actually very diligent at brushing her teeth!

Her dentist said it's not the antibiotics but the infection itself that's causing it. Apparently the body can temporarily redirect oxygen and other resources from the teeth to the site of the infection.

A couple of children in DC's class have bad tooth decay (you can see it from distance)

This could be DS2. A mix of genetic predisposition plus hyperemesis in pregnancy. I do feel guilty about it - I managed to eat properly when pg with DS1 and DS1 has zero tooth problems.

Oh for God's sake - this is why the teacher's are having to do it!1

None of those are excuses for not brushing your kid's teeth.

If a parent is struggling so much that they can't brush their kids teeth, are they really fit to be a parent at all? What else aren't they able to do?

Yes. I do appreciate wanting to understand where people are coming from and recognise we have different children and different experiences but at the same time I do think about all the times I could've taken the easy route but I didn't and denied sugary drinks and snacks and told them how important brushing teeth is -- and ran after them with a toothbrush while still making an effort to make it fun. My kids have good teeth and it's mostly because of me and my DH.

A good point, but that’s not the crap parenting OP means.

Couldn't read past 'Nagga', sorry.

Taking away benefits may plunge people into poverty which is unhelpful especially if they have children. A third of children are already living in poverty.

Yanbu.

Also linked to high fat, high sugar diet that sits on poorly cared for teeth. Children do not need squash or fruit juice every day.
One of DD’s classmates had 2 fillings at 5. She’s also overweight and has no food boundaries.

There are no excuses.

We'll have the teachers shower then too 🤷🏾‍♀️.

I know a kid who had 3 extractions because she had something called hypomineralisation. Of course the mum was demonised in the playground but had been told it might be connected to her kid having the antibiotic amoxicillin which apparently can cause it. The dentist could see this was the cause.

I would be interested to know if there is some overlap in this or if it was even taken into account with the statistics. With the rise in antibiotic use over the last 10 years has no one even considered there might be a link?

At our school we have toothbrushing for all the children after lunch. We are in affluent rural area but some of the children's teeth and breath was absolutely disgusting. We obviously can't force them to brush in school and a few refuse.
I don't agree with parents brushing school children's teeth for them. Supervising yes, brushing, no. I think dental professionals are viewing this from a purely dental point of view, but from a development and self esteem point of view it is invasive, overbearing and infantilising.

I remember being taught about tooth brushing at school in year 1 myself. We got given a chart to put stickers on when we brushed twice a day, I had it on my wall at home and was really proud of it.

I don't think it's a bad thing for schools to be involved in distilling really important hygiene / healthy lifestyle messaging, it's part of learning about your body. Reinforcing it at school provides a more compelling case for kids to pay attention - if both parents and school tell you the same thing there's more chance of it hitting home. It's easy to combine with learning - how many teeth you have, types of teeth, etc. This is school-level knowledge - I wouldn't expect a parent to actively teach about molars and incisors and what not - so the tooth brushing is an easy tag-on to this learning about your body. No big deal!

This makes me so mad, teachers being told how to teach basic hygiene what next teaching how to wash shower, I mean let's not have parents teach there child anything.
Half off these parents probably take great pride in their pearly whites but yet can't teach there offspring.

You are not being unreasonable at all, but you'll read 1,000 excuses here today with all the reasons why parents are unable to get children to brush teeth, eat well, use the loo instead of a nappy etc 🥱.

We may as well just hire entire childcare staff to run alongside teachers as they'll soon have no time to actually teach. School is becoming nothing more than childcare centres.

SEN isn't at all related to this either, there's no excuse for letting a childs teeth rot. Our 9 year old has a learning disability and autism but it takes 1 minute for me to brush his teeth and then he continues to try doing it himself for another minute just needing me to say when to stop as he will continue for a long time otherwise.

Its purely a lack of care regardless of a child's abilities.

I think if it's necessary then DC should be shown, but the first step should be a letter sent out to parents saying there are concerns about lack of teeth brushing, and the government should have an eye test style reminder system where any child who hasn't been to the dentist for over a year gets a letter and followed up on if its ignored.
The same with eye tests, it's shocking how many children don't get their eyes checked every 2 years and again it's only followed up with a letter if the parents have already signed up with an optician.

See also reception children who aren't toilet trained.

The Times radio discussion on this got onto Surestart, but as DH pointed out, parents would need to put their screens down to take them...

Some parents are bone idle or don't have common sense.

I think parents of obese children, children with rotten teeth and other signs of neglect should go on a mandatory parenting course.

It’s all about education, when it’s okay to have a sweet treat, hidden sugars, fruit juices, how and when to brush teeth etc.
We drank water (corporation pop) growing up, only because we couldn’t afford other drinks.

My childhood was the 00s but dad was old school, no way was he wasting ANY money on unnecessary shit like beverages when water is free. He also had rotten teeth himself from eating sweets as a kid so I wasn't allowed sweets either.
He was always taking the piss out of the parents who claimed their kids couldn't drink water

Childsmile has been active in Scotland for many years. A pain in the butt to find the routine in nursery that works. Then the mixed messages of it's ok to brush their teeth then eat or eat and brush their teeth. Not what we were taught years ago.