11+4 and having cravings - husband says to go out on bike to get snacks

Wow.

Such a nasty post.

Kindness goes a long, long way, and empathy too. The lack of these two can be very corrosive in a relationship.

Noth are in very short supply on this thread.

Yes, he was being unreasonable.

You need to get a nice stock of snack items in your pantry.

He should have been more sympathetic. I hope he's generally looking after you, though it doesn't sound like it.

Happy International Women's Day.

I just struggle with the decision to move to a place where you can't easily walk to places when you can't drive. Or leaving learning to drive when you are in a time battle with birth. Don't learn to drive if you want (not including not driving for medical reasons) but live in a city.

I really think I covered all that, but good on you thinking unwell pregnant women should get no support and just starve for weeks/months. Lovely. Because they are adults is your reasoning i guess.

given I have 2 DC I’m aware of pregnancy thanks 😂 given that OP wants a snack I’m not sure how being seriously unwell is relevant but here we are.

Precisely, it's sad to see that so many women are married to assholes. The least he can do is buy some snacks for his pregnant wife who is carrying his child. Bar is really low on Mumsnet, my ex husband would have done it in a heartbeat.

Neither here nor there with regards to your husband, but I do think you will need to make sure you are more organised when the baby comes. It depends on how big the village you live in is etc, but I live rurally and would have felt extremely isolated if I hadn't been able to get around independently when I had my babies.

My husband would have been out getting me as many snacks as he could think of, before I had even finished the sentence (although I do get hangry, so…).

I think posters are being a bit harsh here - mainly because of the attitude towards non-drivers. I’m pretty fit and healthy, run often, but only cycle occasionally. When I was about your stage of pregnancy, we went on a bike ride and I felt really off-balance. I found it pretty stressful, even though we were off road the whole time. So no, I wouldn’t have considered cycling by a motorway.

Assumptions? Really?

You might want to fact check your own post using the information freely available within this actual thread before accusing others of making assumptions 😂

You've no idea why she lives where she does, how old she is & appear to have missed the minor fact she HAS been learning to drive & has already taken a test.

But can you not see that you’re missing the point?

This isn’t about the OP suffering from the consequences of her actions (which shows a complete lack of empathy on your part, you must be a lovely friend if you hold people to such a high standard 🙄), it’s about her partner supporting her in her pregnancy. She is pregnant now, and that was a choice they BOTH made. Her partner should be contributing to that journey too, even if it is just fetching her something she might be able to stomach in that moment. Being pregnant with their child is not just her problem.

this is not new to most people but it clearly is to you. Adult pregnant women can be very unwell when pregnant. If I’d gone to the shops, the exertion would have meant I couldn’t eat anyway. Days I went to work, I had to have food or starve, because catching the lifts downstairs to buy food was too much exertion and meant I couldn’t eat anything. So yes I relied on my husband, him and the office smoothie delivery man. It wasn’t enough food to stop losing weight, but it kept my baby healthy until the misery eased. I was an adult pregnant woman. Adult women of all varieties are allowed to need help. If they are pregnant adult women with a partner it is only reasonable to expect that help to come from the partner. This is not a new or a complicated concept, except seemingly to you.

Walk?

Bloody hell, someone missed the point and is making pretty big assumptions. My partner is more supportive than I could ever hope for, what we consider basic support to each other is far and beyond this nonsense. In fact I’ve been shouted down on here when I’ve described how we work as lying. What can you do, especially when people like you get it wrong the other way 😂

My point is OP, at 11 weeks apparently has “no food in the house”, made an idiotic decision to move to an isolated place whilst being unable to drive, activity chose not to learn, decided to have a baby and is now reaping the “rewards” of those decisions. If I asked DH to get me snacks he would, but I also wouldn’t leave myself in the situation OP has. Like many posts on here, the snacks are the issue.

Sure - but not this poster. She said she intends to learn 'and' she chose to live in this location where she is 100% reliant on her partner to fetch things for her. Of course life can change and who knows if any of us will be able to drive forever, but she has set her life up in an unsustainable way.

Bloody hell, how sad for you. You can act like an adult and still rely on your loved ones for help when you’re not feeling your best. If that’s not your experience of life, than I feel very sorry for you.

OP YANBU at all. My DH would have dropped anything as soon as he could to go and get me something I might be able to eat when pregnant with my two. Pregnancy nausea is so rough, and all these women hating other women who have supportive partners is just plain sad. They should be raising their expectations, not you lowering yours.

Sometimes this place baffles me, some people here are being bloody awful - surely you're not like this IRL?

Glad you got some snacks sorted, OP, & good luck with your next driving test.

Have a chat with your OH, you don't really say whether this is unusual for him so maybe worth re-iterating how much support you'll need over the coming months. Maybe he was quick in his comms with you & wasn't really thinking & you are (obvs) feeling sensitive, taking more from it than needed. Had you started the request with 'on your way home could you..' his reaction would have been different, I hope so.

But ignore the supercilious arsehattery here, it's enough to make anyone feel nauseous at times. 'oh but I was running marathons in 4 inch heels across the Nairobi desert at 34 weeks on a diet of lettuce leaves & radishes flicks hair dramatically Having not eaten a single UPF in years'

Nobody is being unreasonable. I wouldn’t fancy that cycle either. And he’s not unreasonable not to go during work (given you didn’t actually explain that you meant after work).

Put another way, you’re both being unreasonable not to have communicated better or set yourselves up better to avoid this sort of thing- learn to drive, get organised so that there’s always something in your like to eat etc etc. it will pay dividends when the baby is here.

I wouldn't cycle that ever, regardless of pregnancy status!

No, I’d didn’t rely on “my partner buying things”, as I said…I acted like an adult.

It’s a first baby. Nobody thinks 4 weeks preg with my first, maybe in a week there will be only 5 things I can eat, not all at one time, only in good moments, for the next 8 weeks so I had better buy out the supermarkets. You discover what you can eat, by your partner buying different things and you seeing if you can think about them without being sick, then if you can look at them, then if you can get them into your mouth.

He's probably sick of being a taxi for you and fancying a snack whilst he's working just tipped him over the edge.

For the future so you know about whoosh with Tesco. Pretty good

Equally I acted like an adult and had things in when I was pregnant. In fact, I have food in the house now, groundbreaking stuff.
I also would take responsibly for my choices…moving to an isolated place whilst being unable to drive and (presumably) planning to have a child wouldn’t have been a choice I’d make.