Boss's ex wife

Very much a boss problem then.

Or rather that your boss could apply I mean as she’s his ex wife. She’s contacting his workplace, colleagues and causing you fear and distress. I really hope that she calms down though and you don’t have to go through any more stress to get this resolved!

Im really sorry that you’ve found yourself caught up in what sounds like a ridiculous and terrible situation! If it continues or god forbid escalates, you might be able to apply for a non-molestation order against her? The criteria to qualify are pretty wide and would certainly take into consideration that she isn’t listening to or accepting that her behaviour is wrong, regardless of if it’s directed at the correct person!

Surely the ex will recognise OPs voice....

This for sure

He's using you to protect his new woman. What a prince.

If you know who the other woman is, tell the wife when she calls.

Time to think about moving to another job.
If she is mad enough to involve her children, she is mad enough to cause you physical harm

As others have said - don't use your name when answering the phone? I know the problem is bigger than this, but it's a start

You should refuse to lock up on your own until it’s sorted.

Also log everything she or her cronies call with the police. It definitely is harassment and if nothing else, the police will need to deal with it where the pattern emerges

Time to tell your boss that he needs to have his lawyer send a cease and desist notice to his ex wife confirming that you are not the woman in question nor does she work in the business and that if she continues to harrass you along with her friends and family he will contact the police due to harassment. If he does not you should confirm that you will be seeking your own advice from ACAS on lodging a grievance about him due to the intolerable working conditions that are not only affecting you but your colleagues too caused by his failure to keep it in his trousers. Good luck

Do you have to answer saying 'Jenny speaking' can you change it to 'holly speaking' if you're exclusively doing dinner them?

Similar happened at my work! The wife would call drunk and rant at whoever answered the phone and threatened to turn up to confront the affair partner. HR logged it with the police every time, all calls were recorded and she was also frequently emailing the office. Don’t be fobbed off by the police this IS harassment and of course you know who it is. Do a list of all the times she has called and examples of what she says to you especially any direct threats and call 101. Record keeping is important to evidence the harassment . In our case the police went to speak to the wife and she stopped.
in the meantime totally agree with boss having duty of care to you, ensure you put in writing to him the impact this is having on your mental health, your ability to do your job and you won’t be locking up or alone in the office until this stops.

Your boss has a duty of care to you and needs to protect you. There’s no way you should be locking up alone.

tell the wife the real name of the OW.

I'm sorry you're going through this. For what it's worth men like this respond best when you speak to them with their wallet. Get signed off sick with stress and anxiety. State signes off until this has "all blown over". It will blow over a lot quicker as soon as boss has to do your job or pay for someone to sort you

I would tell my boss that, until this unpleasant issue (entirely of his doing) is solved, all phone calls directed to the company should go through him first. Let him deal with his wife on the phone. For legitimate business calls, he can forward the call to you or the other employee.

I bet the Daily Mail picks this story up.

I have no actual advice. So I'm going to give you ridiculous advice. I'd start answering all calls differently "Hello this is the sperm donation centre, you wank it we bank it, how may I help you today?" "Hello you've reached the national centre of swear management, have you reached your quota of fucks to give and need to increase your spend cap?"

I mean it seems like he won't care until it starts to directly effect him 🤷. And you're simply coming up with creative ways to deter nuisance callers.

Or yeah just answer as a different name. Tell her the other one was sacked for tracing people's personal information via phone hacking and selling the information from incoming calls to scam artists?

It's very odd to have to bring your husband in to hear from the boss that you're not having an affair. So he'd believe him but not you? How mortifying for you that people at work had to see that was the case.

So 'just in case', the OP has had to organise this meeting in order to pre-emptively reassure her husband that she's not shagging her boss? How is that normal? My word would be enough for my husband. His only concern would be that some lunatic woman was harassing me and that my useless twat of a boss wasn't doing anything about it. There's no way I'd need to organise a meeting to assuage his insecurity. And, even if there was any meeting, it would have a very different agenda.

I had something similar happen to me when I was a young receptionist. A male colleague had split up from his wife, although there wasn’t another woman involved to my knowledge. She was a psycho & took it upon herself to call him at work and I was left fielding the calls. When I wouldn’t connect the calls to him she accused me of sleeping with him and called me all the names under the sun. I got so sick of it and there was no support from the management. So when she called again and he wasn’t in the office I just said to her “why on earth would I want to sleep with him. The guy is a w**nker you’re well rid!” She was stunned, agreed and never called again.

Tell DBoss he better make it stop or you will seek legal advice. And it will be him in trouble as he has put you in a position that risks your safety.

You can bet your life that if his new mistress was answering the phone, he would have had the police involved properly, CCTV installed, phone screening call equipment and solicitors letters sent by now!

But noooo he's letting you receive the blunt of his misdeeds?
Nah, that's a mediocre manager that one.
As most have stated, he owes you a duty of care.
Note down every single call with info (time, date, what was said etc) and keep a log.
He needs to man up and speak to the ex and TELL HER that his new squeeze is NOT YOU.
He needs to get systems in place for your safety, or else you will tell the wife the real mistresses name and the mistress can crack on with the fallout.

what a despicable man for throwing you under the bus to protect his new life.

Your boss is being very unfair - he’s happy to use you for a decoy while he and OW have a quiet life.
I would feel very vulnerable - who knows what wife will do to you if angry and upset?

Could your husband (or you and your husband) speak to wife about the mistake and convince her she’s barking up the wrong tree? Obviously you can’t alone and your boss won’t.