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Original poster

'that £340 is too expensive for a staycation ?

162 replies

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 10:05

My friend decided that she wants to have one night in a nice spa hotel for one night. So far so good. They can leave their kids at home, but we can't, so hers is only £225 whereas ours is £340, no spa treatment, just bed and breakfast.

Isn't that a bit too steep?

OP posts:
Letstheriveranswer · 06/03/2025 12:27

If it's so close to you, could you sleep at home but get a babysitter and join her for the day spa, dinner and a treatment?

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 12:25

LindaLeggings · 06/03/2025 12:20

I'm confused now. You originally posted as though this was a couples weekend plus your five year old, now you're saying she's going with her husband and offered to babysit your DC.
So who was going in the first place?

She offered to take turns in babysitting (as I said we couldn't go because of the 5yo).

She went ahead and booked the hotel room after I said I wouldn't come.

OP posts:
NetZeroZealot · 06/03/2025 12:25

Get a day ticket for the spa, meet your friends for dinner at the hotel resale and take a taxi home.

popsickle555 · 06/03/2025 12:24

I do think that’s a bit different. But I agree it’s a lot for one night! Is there any chance you could just go for the evening bit and get a babysitter or failing that I’d go alone and try and share with another person attending to halve the cost.

LindaLeggings · 06/03/2025 12:20

I'm confused now. You originally posted as though this was a couples weekend plus your five year old, now you're saying she's going with her husband and offered to babysit your DC.
So who was going in the first place?

wknobur · 06/03/2025 12:19

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 12:17

It's her 40th birthday celebration

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You still don't have to go.
She's proposed something for her birthday which is very expensive and ridiculous for you because you have a five year old in two.
You really don't have to go. Tell her you'll take her out for a nice meal the week after to celebrate.

Fuuuuuckit · 06/03/2025 12:18

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 10:20

I call it a staycation because it's a 20 min drive....

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I wouldn't spend that much on an overnight stay 20 mins from home. That's insanity.

I also wouldn't be taking DC with me to any spa break.

Is your friend bringing her other half? Can you leave yours at home with your dc?

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 12:17

popsickle555 · 06/03/2025 12:13

Why do you have to go anyway? Is it a birthday? You haven't said why you have to go in the original post but If my friend said 'i want to stay in a nice hotel for a night' I'd say - great, have a nice time! Seriously though, if you need / want to go can you not just go alone or just attend the dinner part and leave DC with DH? Or get a babysitter just for the eve?

It's her 40th birthday celebration

OP posts:
WhereYouLeftIt · 06/03/2025 12:16

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 11:35

Because she wants to bring her husband! It's not a "girls only" break

Her children are much older than mine, and find him a "baby". Plus, our 5yo has never spent a night without both of us.

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Oh FFS just tell her NO, it doesn't work for you! Because it doesn't.

Why are you agonising over this when it's clear her suggestion is just plain bonkers? WHY?

wknobur · 06/03/2025 12:15

I think that's a ridiculous amount of money for one night and I'd never pay that much. I'm going to Madrid next week and it's costing less than that for 3 nights, including flights.

Each to their own though and I know that some people love treating themselves to a luxury spa experience. But if you can't afford it or think it's too expensive just say sorry, friend, it's too expensive for us because we have to factor in our child too and it won't be a relaxing experience for us because we'll be having to make sure the 5 year old is entertained all day.

popsickle555 · 06/03/2025 12:13

Why do you have to go anyway? Is it a birthday? You haven't said why you have to go in the original post but If my friend said 'i want to stay in a nice hotel for a night' I'd say - great, have a nice time! Seriously though, if you need / want to go can you not just go alone or just attend the dinner part and leave DC with DH? Or get a babysitter just for the eve?

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 12:12

EternalSunshine19 · 06/03/2025 12:11

Can't you leave your child at home with her dad? Why does he have to go with you and your friend if that means you have to take your child with you?

Because her husband is going, they've already booked as a couple, and I'm no third wheeler

OP posts:
EternalSunshine19 · 06/03/2025 12:11

Can't you leave your child at home with her dad? Why does he have to go with you and your friend if that means you have to take your child with you?

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 12:08

InTheRainOnATrain · 06/03/2025 11:57

We're planning to go to the Four Seasons in Hampshire
https://www.fourseasons.com/hampshire/services-and-amenities/family/
Am I going mad? 😬 I just checked in case it’s changed since we last went because it was a little while ago now and it’s all listed in the link above. Horseback riding. Complimentary Kids for All Seasons. Mini shetland pony grooming of Dougal and Milo who are super cute- my kids met Dougal, I have a photo! So no, I’m not thinking of somewhere else and pretty sure I’m not going insane…. Unless perhaps you’ve mentioned the wrong hotel name??

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Yes At A LATER DATE - not this time with my friend.

OP posts:
InTheRainOnATrain · 06/03/2025 11:57

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 11:40

You definitely think we're going to another place.

Kids club is not free, it's around £25 for a 2 hour session, and definitely no ponies!!

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We're planning to go to the Four Seasons in Hampshire
https://www.fourseasons.com/hampshire/services-and-amenities/family/
Am I going mad? 😬 I just checked in case it’s changed since we last went because it was a little while ago now and it’s all listed in the link above. Horseback riding. Complimentary Kids for All Seasons. Mini shetland pony grooming of Dougal and Milo who are super cute- my kids met Dougal, I have a photo! So no, I’m not thinking of somewhere else and pretty sure I’m not going insane…. Unless perhaps you’ve mentioned the wrong hotel name??

Rosebud987 · 06/03/2025 11:55

I often spend that much and often more on a spa night away. It’s a treat and to me it’s worth it. However I’d never take my kids on a spa break. Most spa’s don’t let kids in so it seems a waste to stay in a spa hotel if you can’t use the facilities

cardibach · 06/03/2025 11:51

iamnotalemon · 06/03/2025 11:50

A staycation isn't staying at home:

a holiday spent in one's home country rather than abroad, or one spent at home and involving day trips to local attractions.

I had to google it as I thought I'd been using it wrong...

I’ve gone into the history of it upthread, and why I think this new meaning (dictionaries follow usage, they don’t dictate it) is pretty obnoxious as well as illogical.

iamnotalemon · 06/03/2025 11:50

A staycation isn't staying at home:

a holiday spent in one's home country rather than abroad, or one spent at home and involving day trips to local attractions.

I had to google it as I thought I'd been using it wrong...

mrsm43s · 06/03/2025 11:50

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 11:35

Because she wants to bring her husband! It's not a "girls only" break

Her children are much older than mine, and find him a "baby". Plus, our 5yo has never spent a night without both of us.

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Just because she brings her husband doesn't mean that you need to bring yours.

The very, very, very obvious answer is that your DH stays at home with your 5yo and you go along with your friend and her husband.

Why do you keep ignoring this really obvious solution?

Otherwise, don't go at all. But bringing your 5yo along on an adult break is ridiculous and will ruin it for everyone. It wouldn't occur to me to do this, and I imagine your friend will be really pissed off if you ruin their child free break by dragging your kid along.

Original poster
Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 11:49

She's booking it with her husband, so problem solved! She offered to babysit too but it's her birthday, I'd rather give her the gift of no kids!

OP posts:
iamnotalemon · 06/03/2025 11:49

I personally wouldn't spend that but it's up to you and your budget. Also one night, I feel by the time you've checked in late and checked out early, you don't really get much time to enjoy it.

sansou · 06/03/2025 11:45

Isitameproblem · 06/03/2025 11:20

DH unequivocally said that for that price tag there was no way in hell he'd enjoy it.

I don't mind spending that sort of money when I feel it's worth it. We're going to the Four Seasons in Hampshire at some point (and that's £700 per night) but we've bought into that concept and now we can make use of everything they have to offer. Plus it's a long way for us, so to me it feels like a proper break.

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Well, that's an easy No then

LlynTegid · 06/03/2025 11:44

It would be a polite no from me. I'd baulk at half that, and I am choosy about comforts in hotels.

Toddlerteaplease · 06/03/2025 11:41

Why can't you leave the five year old at home and just you go? I wouldn't be willing to spend that much for a hotel only twenty minutes away though.

Snowtea · 06/03/2025 11:40

Just apologise say no and suggest they come to you on the way/way back

”absolutely doesn’t work this time unless you want to make it a girls only thing?”