To hate holiday with baby

Wow! How insensitive. I think it’s quite normal to feel this after a ten hour flight looking after a baby’s every needs. To be honest we never went long haul at that age, just two hours to Spain/France and that change in routine was enough. Jet lag must be brutal. But give it a few days and hopefully it’ll seem better. I agree though, it can feel like doing the same shit just in a hotter place!

Why on earth go longhaul out of choice with a baby? Madness.

You shouldn't have gone so far. For me, I would never ever go 10 hours in a plane with a 6 month old baby. That to my mind is the real issue, not the actual going away.

A 6-mont-old needs everthing to be stable and arranged around them, and you are on a 2-hour feeding schedule. So how are you supposed to participate in a 'holiday'?

Yes, you're going to have to dissolve your anger because it's a waste of being somewhere lovely. So just calm down and enjoy it as much as you can.

The first holiday as parents is always a revelation, don't worry we've all been there. You just have to adjust your expectations. And take the small wins 😊.

I remember going away with ours very young to a church camping event that we enjoyed pre-DC. One of the other mums said, expect to get no sleep, that they won't settle in the crèche and you won't get to any of the presentations. Then at least its a bonus if you do.

You can definitely leave an EBF 6 month old for more than 2 hours. And I say that having had 3 of them, none of whom would ever take expressed milk. But at 6 months they really can go a good 4 hours at least.

As others have said, catch up on sleep one way or another and then figure out what you want from the trip - an hour alone each day to read? Swim? Go shopping by yourself? Not sure where you are or what activities you enjoy, but surely there will be something there that will make you happy.

We did long haul with a 5 month old DC1 and it was awesome, then again with 2 yo DC1 and 4 month old DC2 and that was awesome too. But you have to settle into it and let go of hating DH so that you can actually enjoy yourself.

Gonna parrot the rest. Same shit different location - but you're also supposed to be epically enjoying yourself. Yay. Fun.

Your dh is a twat, as baby is EBF he needs to lay off the expectations and let you and baby rest until you're ready to play Yay! Fun!

YANBU

Oh please. What an answer! You jump to mental health issues just because OP is having one of those days. God I could have murdered my DH sometimes when baby was little….

Ok, 6 months, that’s a little earlier than I would have braved long haul. It does have some benefits though - a non mobile EBF baby who still naps is easier to travel with in many ways than an older baby/toddler.

You can still enjoy it though. Take the 2 hour nap. And another nap later if you need it.

Do you have baby swim stuff with you? Do you have a shade for the buggy? Is there a baby friendly pool? Make sure you tag team 50/50 with DH regardless of EBF.

Try go with it if you can! I’ve travelled a lot with ours as a baby and try not let your anger take over your mind ….give baby to your DH for a few hours while you get a bath / nap/ drink/ go the pool/ whatever you like to do. There’s two of you , so be kind to yourself and share out the baby duties!
if baby is tired , have a chill morning and do something in the afternoon. Don’t put pressure to be up and out entertaining your DH!
I always think parenting is bloody hard but I’d rather be doing it in a beautiful country with beautiful weather than stuck in rainy England in Tesco. It’s a week or two . Have some nice food (room service if baby is unsettled) and try enjoy small bits. Where are you on holiday out of interest?

Exactly, remembering our first 6 months, we were insane, sleep deprived lunatics deprived of all reason and judgement. Probably how OP ended up on a long haul and why her DH mistakenly thought it was a good idea.

I also would be annoyed btw OP. 10 hours long haul with a breast fed 6 month old. You might as well enjoy it now though.
Next holiday will be your choice of location.

My kids are primary age and we've still not been further the Greece with them and I don't intend to until they are both older. Kids stopped our long haul trips.
I understand how you feel because if my partner had done the same to me I would want to kill him so you are quite justified in how you feel in my opinion. Make sure he knows how you feel and that he helps look after the baby while you're there. Tell him you don't want to do it again while LO is a baby and least not that far!
Holidays make some men forget they have to parent and he'll leave you holding the baby while he is relaxing. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt. To be fair my DP is great now they are older so I can relax but the baby years were grim for me. I loved being with my family but I resented doing the feeds, getting babies to sleep in scorching hot weather, putting all the feckin cream on a million times a day etc. It's just not a holiday is it?

I just think we're all different and that's ok - how does your DH feel right now?
I think holidays with babies/toddlers/young kids is parenting but a million times BETTER!
My absolute happiest times have been on holiday with our kids, they've travelled all over, short haul, long haul, Europe road trips, so many experiences and adventures and I've loved every one.
What is it that's the worst part for you?

You never know unless you try. I really enjoyed travelling with mine. I still do, and he’s 3 now. Lots of people don’t, though, and that’s understandable too.

Would two hours sleep/rest while they wander round help right now?

10 hours is a bit of a hardcore way to test whether you like travelling with children, but you’re there now, so try and make the most of it. You can always decide that you don’t want to do it again when you get home.

Yep holiday with kids is not a holiday. However, you can still have a good time. Just not a relaxing one.
We went on a holiday when our son was 8 months, luckily it was the UK and we went home after a day.
Has your hotel got a creche? Explore how to get a little break of an hour here and there it will make a big difference.
Swap duties, go to to the spa alone and chill.
Dont feel forced to explore, do outings or take pictures.
Chill in the room with baby, watch tv, eat and sleep for a day or two to get back on track

How old is your baby?

We took DD to Mauritius when she was 18 months. The flight was bloody hard - lots of jiggling and juggling to keep her entertained (she slept for 4 hours of a 12 hr night flight).

BUT. Once we’d all napped and recovered … it was lovely. We have some really great memories. Admittedly there wasn’t the jetlag. But honestly, I really think you will feel differently once you have all caught up on sleep.

Hand baby over and go for a long sleep.

Yeah. Being on holiday with a baby is not having all your creature comforts in a hot climate with an exhausted baby. See also: going to a festival with a baby. Going to a wedding with a baby. Going anywhere where not the local park/a family friend/family for over 2 hours.

But you’re there now. Get partner to take baby out for 2 hours with appropriate equipment. Strict instructions: DO NOT COME BACK (unless dire). Rest. Back to great mum. Throw clothes in the bin where necessary. Take home baby in just vest if required. Stare angrily at anyone who gets in your way. Stay in hotel room all day if necessary. Laugh about it later.

It was a really stupid idea (well done DH).

Get some alone time. Hand baby over and go and chill by a pool or beach.

The actual travel to get to your destination can be the worst . BTW he has to do it on the way home. But after some sleep and a nice morning things will seem better . Best thing about holiday is no schedule, doze when you want to , let baby sleep in buggy , don't worry too much about routine. The sun , splashing in water , etc.will tire baby out more too. Try to put the journey behind you and enjoy ☀️

No it’s not. Spending 10 hours on a plane with an unsettled baby is seriously horrific.

Oh shut up. Even the strongest of people lose it a little when sleep deprived - that's the reason it's such an effective torture method.

Do you have mental health issues? This is an extreme reaction to being on holiday with a baby.

Honestly that's the answer. If you did most of the holding baby, give him over to dad who goes for a walk etc and get a few hours kip