Friend's one night stands to get pregnant

If she wanted to get pregnant she would have timed it to get pregnant and it wouldn't be 25 times. What if she is struggling to conceive, would she know?
What if the men in question have health issues (beyond STD's) that can be inherited?
What if they are dim/dishonest/possess personality characteristics that she would not deal well with if they were replicated in her children?
What if the men do want to be part of the child's life but not hers and she is lumbered with someone she can't stand right from the get go?
Are you sure she's not just having poorly judged fun because it sounds like a ridiculous way to go about pregnancy?

I don't quite get her mindset of why she won't go down the donor route, but ultimately she isn't deceiving anyone i guess, she's giving men options to opt out of her conditions. Its not something I understand or would encourage but also not something I'd interfere with or let cloud by judgement of her.

It's none of your business what she does. She is unlikely if she does conceive to tell the child oh I had a load of one night stands - she is I imagine going to say it was a one night stand.
The amount of women who post on here about the absolutely god awful fathers they have for their children - cutting some of them out would be a blessing.
Any man who does not use a condom during sex knows he runs the risk of getting the woman pregnant and does not care - even if she wasn't upfront about it - even if she said she uses contraception.

I think it’s morally wrong to pre-plan to deny a child their right to know a biological parent.

The only thing going I don't get is how she can pit herself at risk of serous STDs!
Yes she gets tested but if she gets a sportive AFTER she caught it, then she might have it for life (Depending on what she catches!) And she does get 0regnant and ends up with an STD at the same time that can be very damaging for baby.... now, this would be the only thing I would be thinking bit I'm sure she must know that too!

what is meant by this?

Your friend's intentions are clear and her actions would strike many people as rash. But I wonder how many women get 'accidentally' pregnant with almost-strangers without telling themselves or anyone else what the plan is. Hormones can be powerful things.

Wouldn’t be surprised if this is true of at least some of the men.

She´s probably wasting her time doing it with guys who have had vasectomies...and forgot to tell her...

I think she should start looking for a relationship with someone who wants children fast and will be happy for any pregnancy attempts to be very soon.

It is sad for a child to have a dad who just went along with it as long as their mum said she wouldn't pursue him for it. I think I'd feel sad or empty somehow if I knew that was my dad's criterion for conceiving me.

This. Despite what you say, she absolutely is putting herself at risk of std's by having unprotected sex with strangers

I would judge her as frankly I think it’s disgusting but in your shoes I would advise her to get some fertility tests done. at her age and sleeping with all sorts of men and she hasn’t got pregnant yet. She needs to be sure she can actually get pregnant and isn’t wasting her time.

I strongly suspect that she is not telling them (unless she means they had implied knowledge by not ascertaining her contraceptive status).

I suppose it's more fool them in that case.

But it still seems icky. None of the screening or background checks that you would get if she used donor sperm. And more difficult to explain to a child. Sperm donation seems more respectable than going out and getting nobbed by a load of strangers. But maybe I'm a boring old pearl clutcher and at least she's enjoying "having fun" as she puts it. There might never be a baby.

You’re right, it’s none of your business.

She reassured me that she does do STD tests and never puts herself at risk.

Well she's having unprotected sex with strangers. An STD test after the fact wont help you if you've contracted HIV.

That might be unlikely, but that's not the same as never putting yourself at risk.

There's also the risk she falls pregnant, the guy wants to be involved, and she ends up sharing custody. Which I assume she doesn't really want.

I think she’s incredibly naive. Children are as much their dads as they are their mums. You can tell a lot just by meeting your partners immediate family as to how your children will turn out. She’s barely even getting to know the man. Madness. What a gamble.

I also have my doubts.

Aside from the health risks, I just don't think I'd want to have a baby with someone I didn't know. You don't know if they have a high risk of some traumatic medical condition, or everyone in their family gets cancer, or that they're fundamentally not very intelligent, etc etc.

Unprotected sex with 25 men is grim. Massive risk of STDs, both to her and the men. Do the men know they’re 1 of 25 so the risk is so much higher? Are they giving informed consent? Grim.

it does seem a bit risky. She has no idea who these men are or what their medical history is. They could have genetic issues which could pass onto a potential child. If she doesn’t want to go the sperm donor route (the safest option imo), then I would at least try to get a bit of background on someone before bearing their child.

How do you know? The majority of men I've slept with, weren't the one to suggest a condom, they would have been more than happy to have unprotected sex without even asking me if I was on the pill.

I don't see how anyone can support this. Never mind what she wants, or disease risk, any of that.

It is your responsibility to do your very bloody best to not lumber your child with a shit or abusive parent. She doesn't know these men at all, so has absolutely no way of judging what kind of a man they are or if they are a danger to a child emotionally or physically. And before I get 'well all men can turn, you don't truly know anyone' there is a world of difference between a lovely partner turning bad after you get pregnant, who you have done your best to 'vet' beforehand, and willingly getting pregnant with no information to go on. Having no information to go on whatsoever means you could be flipping a coin with the rest of your child's life and wellbeing. It's so irresponsible. You could be having a baby with a convicted predator for God's sake! If you are so desperate for a baby you can't see how much danger this puts your child in then you shouldn't be having children. You could be having a baby with a complete narcissist, that would be within their rights to turn up and get custody arrangements in place! Cannot believe the selfishness of this.

As long as she's telling them, I don't see the issue, even if she doesnt tell them, if they're willing having unprotected sex, that's their own look out, men are aware of how babies are made, I don't see the need to infantilize them.
Having said that, a sperm donor would be a much more sensible idea.

I cannot believe somebody is stupid enough to risk their physical health in this manner just for a child.

And I don’t think she is being honest at all.

Surely finding a partner is easier than this (as in somebody she thinks will make a good partner and father even if she does not fancy him.)

Deranged and deluded.