Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To HATE the phrase "lived experience"?

557 replies

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 06:36

Pet peeve incoming:

By definition, experience is lived! You can hardly have an experience without living it, fgs! And what's the opposite of lived experience? An experience that you've had, yet haven't lived? It's complete nonsense. It's used to sound falsely clever when an argument is weak, like "In my personal experience." Well, of course your experience is personal! You would hardly say, "In my neighbour's experience, I find Florida too cold in December."

And it's officially wrong, because it's a tautology. Like "top-floor penthouse."

I don't know whether it's the innate stupidity of the phrase or the fact that it's a linguistic fad that annoys me the most.

"stamps off"

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
madamweb · 03/03/2025 08:03

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 06:44

OK, so you're saying that it's possible to have an experience that you haven't lived through?

I get what you are saying, linguistically

But I think the idea is to distinguish between someone who actually has the condition and someone who (for instance) just has experience of treating the condition.

GretchenWienersHair · 03/03/2025 08:03

Ddakji · 03/03/2025 07:27

It’s an oxymoron, focus on moron.

I don’t think you know what an oxymoron is.

familyissues12345 · 03/03/2025 08:03

Porcuporpoise · 03/03/2025 07:52

In my experience the people who object to the concept of things like "lived experience " are those who get outraged at the suggestion that their opinion isn't as valueable as that of others on certain topics - white women talking about racism in the UK springs to mind, or the able bodied talking about accessibility issues.

Yes!

WhiteLily1 · 03/03/2025 08:02

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 06:50

"Personal experience" is as redundant as "lived experience."

No it isn’t?
Second hand and first hand experience exists OP. Why are you trying to force your opinion that they are the same thing?
You asked a question. You’ve been shown to be wrong. Maybe take this as ‘lived experience’ of being corrected.

LillyPJ · 03/03/2025 08:01

Porcuporpoise · 03/03/2025 07:52

In my experience the people who object to the concept of things like "lived experience " are those who get outraged at the suggestion that their opinion isn't as valueable as that of others on certain topics - white women talking about racism in the UK springs to mind, or the able bodied talking about accessibility issues.

But is that your lived experience or just your experience?

familyissues12345 · 03/03/2025 08:01

Ddakji · 03/03/2025 07:50

Another example within health, given that many are banging on about that.

My mother had terminal cancer (she just had it. She didn’t have lived experience of it. Using more words doesn’t change the facts.)

Her oncologist was experienced in treating cancer. Whether her oncologist had ever had cancer herself was bloody irrelevant. Her “lived experience” was not the experience at hand.

You can't see that having an oncologist who has had cancer themselves, can be even more beneficial than having one who has been taught about cancer and worked with many patients?

You really can't see the difference?

CaptainMyCaptain · 03/03/2025 08:01

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 06:43

No, they really are not. Please explain to me how it's possible to have an experience without living it?

It's experience gained first hand as opposed to learning about it from a book. For example professionals advising drug users are often ex-addicts who know the pain they clients are experiencing rather than just knowing 'about' it. Ditto domestic violence, bereavement, child SA etc.

Ponoka7 · 03/03/2025 08:01

IButtleSir · 03/03/2025 07:21

You'd have experience of teaching autistic pupils. The pupils would have experience of being autistic. No need for the word 'lived' anywhere.

But there is when putting together a panel of people to review services, if you don't want to waffle on and make people tune out. It's a simple way of explaining what perspective a person is coming from.
It was still a fairly new phase when person centered planning and service users reviewing and help to plan how the service is delivered, came into being. It went back further when communities (often after riots etc) were involved in shaping their future.

It then extended to medical. Especially when arrogant male surgeons were telling women that their symptoms or pain was imaginary.
My DP's stoma nurse's professional experience is useful, but the lived experience of the people on the FB page is actually better.

Seymour5 · 03/03/2025 08:01

I used the term quite recently here, apologies if it didn’t make sense. I didn’t realise it would be an irritant. However, in my defence, it was in response to a post suggesting that people of my age were likely to have only worked for 35 years before a long retirement. I’m late 70s, and whilst I can’t answer for every one of my age, my working life, from leaving school at 15 was nearer 50.

I’ve lived a heck of a lot longer than most people who post on here about old age, many who have quite strong opinions about what our lives were and are like. Younger people can’t have experienced old age, and older people’s experiences are very different. Hence my use of the term to describe mine.

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 08:00

GreyCarpet · 03/03/2025 07:29

It would be totally wrong to say that the worker had experience of DV and the victim had lived experience of it. The worker, in this scenario, only has experience of supporting the victims of DV.

OK. To use this example, the worker would have experience of DV. In the many ways it can present, the impact on victims, just how manipulative abusers are. They would also understand why many women don't leave because of their personal experiences.

People who have no experience of it say things like, "Why don't the women just leave?" or, "But what did she do to provoke him?" Because they have no experience of it.

Last weekend, my partner and I went out. A woman who was nearby was being harassed by some bloke trying to get her to dance by pulling her and trying to take her drink from her. We stepped in and stopped him.

My partner has experience of that kind of thing happening. He has seen it happen before. He didn't think it was a one off or an unusual thing to happen.

I have personal experience of that kind of thing happening because it has happened to me.

In my experience - things I have witnessed (often enough times to have formed an opinion or noticed a recurring pattern).

In my personal experience - this happened to me.

Edited

"My partner has experience of that kind of thing happening." No, he doesn't. He has never been harassed by some bloke trying to get him to dance by pulling him and trying to take his drink from him. (I assume.) In this scenario, he has experience of watching it happen. You're using the shorthand of your partner experiencing such an event when that's not your intended meaning, which is that he has experience as a witness to harassment. We all use that shorthand, but use of said shorthand does not make the phrase "lived experience" correct.

OP posts:
AlisonDonut · 03/03/2025 08:00

Iamnotabot · 03/03/2025 07:57

Nah

Judging by some of the people here, yeah.

MaggieBsBoat · 03/03/2025 07:59

It’s is either linguistic laziness (shortening of a longer form) or just the changes that language has due to time, society etc;

As a trans woman she has not really experienced living as an actual woman.
As a trans woman she hasn’t the lived experience of a woman.

It is a general demonstration of the fall of the genitive in most languages. Interesting as a linguist.

AlisonDonut · 03/03/2025 07:59

Moonlightstars · 03/03/2025 07:53

I think it's incredibly useful term for anyone involved in support services.
I'm Bipolar. I've been sectioned several times.
I've also worked in the domestic violence unit for 10 years but never directly experience significant domestic violence to myself.

If we are trying to plan a new service for the local authority I work for I can have good experience as a worker for the domestic violence uni. I understand how the systems work but I haven't had lived experience of it or understood what it is like to go through the system and therefore it's important to speak people with lived experience.

Equally I would be able to talk about lived experience of bipolar and the service provision there.

For generations services have been made without the inputs of people with lived experience if the issues services are trying to tackle. Creating ineffective services.

This is slowly changing then when it's been done properly I've seen really impressive.

I think this is one of those terms where clarification word has been needed. It may seem nuanced but the impact isn't.

If we are trying to plan a new service for the local authority I work for I can have knowledge as a worker for the domestic violence uni. I understand how the systems work but I haven't had experience of it or understood what it is like to go through the system and therefore it's important to speak people with experience.

You have knowledge. The people who have experienced it, have experience. You don't need the word 'lived' in there.

LameBorzoi · 03/03/2025 07:58

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 07:52

You're annoyed because you can't disprove that "lived experience" is a tautology.

What mental-health worker would claim to have experience of, say, schizophrenia instead of saying that they had a patient experiencing schizophrenia? And if the patient wanted to convey that they had experienced this condition whereas the provider hadn't, they would just say that. "I have experienced this. You have not." We communicated perfectly well without this linguistic blot.

Actually, it's common for health practices in particular roles to have both professional and lived experience. In some roles lived experience is essential.

JasmineTea11 · 03/03/2025 07:58

Its annoying but only because its over used and stretched beyond it's initial function, described up thread.

Many concepts jump from academia into mainstream media and this happens. ' Narrative' is another example, plus all the language from psychotherapy...

Iamnotabot · 03/03/2025 07:57

AlisonDonut · 03/03/2025 07:52

You can watch a ferry leaving Portsmouth and that apparently is 'experience of shipping'.

Nah

andyouwillknowusbythetrailofdead · 03/03/2025 07:56

Igotjelly · 03/03/2025 06:56

It’s used to differentiate between professional experience and personal experience. Which are not the same thing.

No it isn't. "I have experience of treating patients with schizophrenia" / "I have schizophrenia". Or do you not "live" your professional experience?

candycane222 · 03/03/2025 07:56

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 06:48

No, witnessing those things is not the same as experiencing it. You would never witness racism and then say that you'd experienced it. You'd say you'd seen it. If you tell anyone that you've experienced racism, they would 100% think that you mean it was aimed at you.

Edited

Isn't the phrase needed because of the range of meanings of "experienced". As in the direct (a) "I experience hip pain whenever I climb stairs" versus (b) "I am experienced in rheumatology, specialising in hips and knees"

So the admittedly slightly cringy modifier "lived" is added just to make crystal clear to arrogant (b)s that there is some essential expertise out there that they don't have

ThatOtherAustenSister · 03/03/2025 07:55

Moonlightstars · 03/03/2025 07:53

I think it's incredibly useful term for anyone involved in support services.
I'm Bipolar. I've been sectioned several times.
I've also worked in the domestic violence unit for 10 years but never directly experience significant domestic violence to myself.

If we are trying to plan a new service for the local authority I work for I can have good experience as a worker for the domestic violence uni. I understand how the systems work but I haven't had lived experience of it or understood what it is like to go through the system and therefore it's important to speak people with lived experience.

Equally I would be able to talk about lived experience of bipolar and the service provision there.

For generations services have been made without the inputs of people with lived experience if the issues services are trying to tackle. Creating ineffective services.

This is slowly changing then when it's been done properly I've seen really impressive.

I think this is one of those terms where clarification word has been needed. It may seem nuanced but the impact isn't.

See my previous post.

If you're talking to someone it's very very easy indeed to say something is your personal or professional experience, without resorting to a phrase like lived experience.

The context will show if it's your personal life or that as a professional.

No one needs to say 'lived experience'. There are plenty of ways to say 'This is my personal experience' or 'This is my experience through professional training and working with clients ' Or both- whichever is appropriate to context.

Notverygoodatusernames · 03/03/2025 07:54

ThisFluentBiscuit · 03/03/2025 07:52

You're annoyed because you can't disprove that "lived experience" is a tautology.

What mental-health worker would claim to have experience of, say, schizophrenia instead of saying that they had a patient experiencing schizophrenia? And if the patient wanted to convey that they had experienced this condition whereas the provider hadn't, they would just say that. "I have experienced this. You have not." We communicated perfectly well without this linguistic blot.

There has historically been a huge issue with psychiatrists’ experiences being prejudiced over those of people with actual mental health conditions. Which is part of why the term lived experience developed.

Are you this rigid about everything OP?

AlisonDonut · 03/03/2025 07:54

Iamnotabot · 03/03/2025 07:53

It doesn’t make sense. The reporter has “lived experience” of the war zone.

Why not just say the reporter has experienced being in a war zone and the civilian has experienced loss and trauma?

Because using 'lived experience' in funding applications get you higher on the points list.

Sunnysideup999 · 03/03/2025 07:54

To me it implies an inescapability of the experience.
For example, I lived as a poor, hand to mouth student in my younger days.
This is different from the ‘lives experience’ of being truely poor and growing up in poverty.

Ellie1015 · 03/03/2025 07:54

Professionals may say "in my experience" when talking about their area of work and they mean in my experience of working in this area. If they were to say lived experience you would know they have also been in the situation.

Sheeparelooseagain · 03/03/2025 07:53

Yes it did. It was used in mental health. As was expert by experience.

ThatOtherAustenSister · 03/03/2025 07:53

tearsandtiaras · 03/03/2025 07:49

This is a very good description.

We use it in my line of work, theres a big difference. I experience the impact of poverty and neglect when i go into my work families homes, whereas it is the families lived experience.

It's nonsense.

The context tells people all they need to know.

Words are not used out of context.

As an employee there is going to be a difference between what you experience in yur job and what you experience in your personal life.

Whether you are talking to someone or writing about it, they should know the context and if they don't, you need to explain - without using silly phrases like 'lived experience'.

A journalist for example, who talks about their 'experience' makes it very clear in context if it's about THEM or the people in the feature.

Swipe left for the next trending thread