Friends not sponsoring dh

honestly I don’t sponsor many people, that being said if I sent round stuff and someone has kindly donated, I would in turn make a gesture payment. For kids stuff I just put the money in myself.

most people scroll on by, maybe send a few pictures of him doing said event with a link to donate and see how you go.

we are assuming they are not tight for money?

I suspect most of those moaning about being asked to donate haven’t a clue how hard it is to run a marathon. Easy to be dismissive if they’ve never tried. I think there is an ignorance.

Unless your donation means you can’t afford to pay bills, I really don’t see the big deal about supporting someone who is doing something nice for charity.

I’ve done some charity stuff and donated to friends too - it’s always surprise to see who does and doesn’t donate!

I have found a lot of people will donate just before or after the event - they want to see the photos or know it’s happened and then donate. I raised the most amount the day after I did a charity walk and shared pics, update and asked for final donations.

I’ve also been a last min donater myself so hoepfully you’ll see a flurry of donations closer to the time. Keep posting and sharing - and ask others to share.

A friend once had a £1k donation from a person in a whattsapp group they’d shared it in - the donator supported the charity and had never even met my friend!

good luck to your DH!

By all means ask. Once.
I have been asked to sponsor five people so far this year. If you fancy a run around some city in Europe, then you crack on but perhaps the money for your weekend away could have been donated to the charity instead!

I'm afraid I get it. I'll bung a couple of £ to kids whenever asked but would never sponsor an adult to do something they probably want to do anyway. I expect lots of people feel the same!

You’ve missed the point. Sponsorship is for a cause not a person. Shame mental health never gets the interest physical ill health and disability does.

I sponsor only if it's a close friend and /or I support the cause.
Wouldn't necessarily sponsor a friend's DH but it depends what the cause was so I'm on the fence here.

I did something for sponsorship once years ago and all the people I had sponsored for multiple events didn’t bother, I won’t sponsor anyone now.

Im surprised at the results here, im with you OP. If I sponsor someone for a charity event I would be really disappointed if they didn't even bother to do it back. It would put me off doing it for them again in the future.
People saying they hate fundraising and how tacky it is honestly baffle me. Charities need fundraising events to survive, how do people expect them to raise any money without these events? Children in need, comic relief, stand up to cancer, these yearly events raise millions which I guarantee would not be the case if these shows weren't on tv, with people doing these charity events to help towards the funds. They wouldnt make anywhere near that amount without fundraisers.

I bloody hate sponsoring and don’t get me started on Go Fund Me. Fund your self. Most sponsorship is for someone to do something that they want to do, like running, climbing. Just bigger off asking others for money and let us donate to charities of our own choices when we choose.

Yeah that is different.

Not to hijack the thread, but I have recently seen another mum hitting social media HARD to raise money for her daughter to go to a developing country to do charity work. It’s really rubbing me the wrong way….perhaps it’s the sanctimonious attitude of how much giving the teen will be doing abroad, but to me, it looks like she’s just getting people to donate to her daughter’s long haul flight and lodging fund. 🤷‍♀️

But why should anyone else give money for that effort?
Just run it and donate to the charity yourself.

I do donate but only to friends and family immediately affected by something.

After they enthusiastically promised they would immediately be doing so?

hum. okay....

Because it’s not just about the cause, it’s about doing something nice for someone you know. If you can afford to spare a tenner or whatever, why not do a nice thing? 😀

It doesn’t stop me from giving to causes I might care more about.

Yeh you’re not being unreasonable this would piss me off too. Rude and lazy. Even a couple
of quid when you’ve done the same for them. Never sponsor them again. Good luck to your hubby

I think that’s fairly cheeky you chasing up the non-donaters, and making them feel guilty that they didn’t buy anything.

I don't like sponsoring adults but I can understand why you are p*ed off if you have sponsored their family members

Why not email everyone who has ignored it, with a BCC email and say "thank you so much to the handful of people who have stepped up and donated. Even a small amount can make a difference when everyone takes part. For those of you still considering this, please support the cause, we'd be so grateful"

I had similar situation and a bunch of very long term friends said "we're off to put our order in now"But the sales were made online and I was sent lists each week of the names of people who did buy, so I knew exactly who didn't. I sent a similar email to them and they were so embarrassed to be outed that they also followed through on their promise.

Slightly different situation but if you really want them to donate, you have to push, however it works.

This!!!

A few things. I never give to sponsored things. It feels forced and manipulative.
I give to charities that I chose to, about 10% of my income. So no, I wouldn't sponsor your DH.
My children don't ask for sponsorship money. We donate an amount ourselves if they are asked to.

I think these things have died a death for most people, and here's my theory on why.

Prior to social media, people would have to ask you f2f and that would not only be awkward to say no to, it would be very infrequent and limited to people you had immediate contact with.

Over the past 20 years we've gone through various levels of enhanced mithering. It started with round robin emails. Then it was posts on social media. Now it's relentless. Not to mention charities accosting us on every street corner, plus regularly cold calling and doorstepping homes.

Now that everything is online, it's incredibly easy to hold out the begging bowl for donations for everything. Most of these are well intentioned, I might add. The whole concept has died through overexposure - because when you're asked everything 5 minutes it becomes tiresome. It's also become easier to ignore as it's out there in the ether.

A second factor is a greater awareness of the many charity scandals, frauds or abuse like that bloody Captain Tom family.

Not to mention - the numerous non-fraudulent rackets people have shared where most of the money goes to the sodding activity (like the parachute jump) with the leftover bit going to charity.

Having said all of this, although I voted YABU, I really feel for your poor husband, who is stepping up and getting short shrift. 😔

None of the above is personally his or your fault, but sadly even the generous people i know will not usually give outside of immediate family.

As for charities, I think they have collectively shot the golden goose in the free for all. It's very sad, because there are so many good charities that do excellent work. Typically they are all fighting in the same marketplace and if one becomes more aggressive, they all have to follow suit.

They're now competing with each other, with pseudo-charities like private schools, pseudo-fund-raising like parachute jumps, dubious benefits like trips to Africa, and downwards the slippery slope to fake gofundme campaigns, attention-seeking celebs and finally just plain fraud.

I fear that just like everything online, genuine people are at a disadvantage, getting drowned out by the cacophony of people who want to prose open your wallet. 😔

I hope that at least makes it feel less personal. Because its not.

I give to children asking for sponsorship and sometimes to adults if it is a cause I support. I give a lot to charities of my choice so don’t feel bad about not giving to requests from adults. I never sponsor events that cost money for example sky jumps, I prefer my total amount to go to a charity rather than to fund someone’s own experience.

I would be annoyed too. I give a few quid to everything, literally the opening of an envelope!!
Set up a just giving page for the cause, that might help.

How much was he hoping to raise? Just donate that amount yourself without bothering other people to do it instead.