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AIBU?

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Original poster

Hotel costs - is dsis a cf?

44 replies

AreYouTheFarmer7 · 02/03/2025 19:03

A short break, expensive-ish hotel…

Our group are:
1 family of 5 (us)
1 family of 4 (dsis)
1 single grandmother

Dsis has booked 3 family rooms - expected occupancy was dsis family in 1 room, us minus 1 dd in another, grandmother and dd in another.

We’ve paid for 1 room plus 50% of the room grandmother and dd are staying in… All fine…

Now the suggestion has been made by dsis that her dd (19) may stay in the room with grandma and dd ‘to help grandma’ (dd is 8 and very independent, dm absolutely does not need help to look after her - they will literally just be going to the room to sleep, activities planned for the whole trip)

AIBU to think that if she wants her dd to sleep in the room we should split the cost of that room 3 ways?

OP posts:
BornSandyDevotional · 02/03/2025 19:46

What does Grandmother think? Does she want to share at all?

NancyJoan · 02/03/2025 19:44

‘You’d better check that Sarah and Mum are happy sharing a bed. Sophie is looking forward to having a double to herself.’

Original poster
AreYouTheFarmer7 · 02/03/2025 19:44

Inertia · 02/03/2025 19:39

What does grandmother think?

If she is happy with the plan, just tell sister what her share of the extra room will be.

She’s happy, I just feel awkward bringing up the issue of dsis paying up! But equally don’t think it’s fair for her paying 50% of an expensive hotel bill when she’s only had 1/3 share of the room.

OP posts:
BooomShakeTheRoom · 02/03/2025 19:44

Do you love your sister? I can’t imagine being as petty with my sister. Her dd can fit in her room, so it doesn’t really matter which one she sleeps in as there’s beds in both. I think you’re making this unnecessarily a big deal.

Sometimeswinning · 02/03/2025 19:43

Depends on your relationship. I’d suck it up as my sister often hosts all our get togethers so I ignore the odd extra costs she incurs me. Although I feel aggrieved when she doesn’t notice! But that’s just me.

Floralnomad · 02/03/2025 19:43

Just say no as that means your daughter would have to share a bed, unless granny is happy to share a bed with the 19 yr old in which case split the room cost 3 ways

Changingplace · 02/03/2025 19:43

I don’t really see it makes that much difference 🤷‍♀️

Poppyseeds79 · 02/03/2025 19:43

So essentially you'd be paying for a double bed for the 19yr old? I'd say nope

junebirthdaygirl · 02/03/2025 19:42

Never understand why families go away together if they can't get on well enough to not care about silly things like this. It's family. Don't make an issue. Just go and enjoy the break.

PorkHollywood · 02/03/2025 19:41

Would be unfair if your daughter is now expected to share the bed with grandma, but I can also see why the 19 year old would find it preferable to sleep with them 2 than her parents and sibling.

Hankunamatata · 02/03/2025 19:41

I guess it's up to grandma if she wants the 19 staying in her room too?

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 02/03/2025 19:41

What is the £ difference between half and one third? Are you staying at the savoy?

Original poster
AreYouTheFarmer7 · 02/03/2025 19:40

TickingAlongNicely · 02/03/2025 19:33

What beds/rooms are in these family rooms?

Sorry, 2 double beds in 1 room.

OP posts:
Inertia · 02/03/2025 19:39

What does grandmother think?

If she is happy with the plan, just tell sister what her share of the extra room will be.

Original poster
AreYouTheFarmer7 · 02/03/2025 19:39

violetsorrengail · 02/03/2025 19:29

Does it really make a massive difference? Who is paying the other 50% got grandmother's room? Grandmother?

Yes 50/50 us and grandmother

OP posts:
TickingAlongNicely · 02/03/2025 19:33

What beds/rooms are in these family rooms?

Original poster
AreYouTheFarmer7 · 02/03/2025 19:31

We’ve already paid for the half the room - there was no mention of her paying me/mum her share for her dd - as she’s framed it as her her dd ‘helping’ she won’t expect to pay I don’t think.

(I’m also obvs a conflict avoider!)

OP posts:
violetsorrengail · 02/03/2025 19:29

Does it really make a massive difference? Who is paying the other 50% got grandmother's room? Grandmother?

HenDoNot · 02/03/2025 19:07

So what did she say when you said “great, we’ll split the cost of that room 3 ways” ?