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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

I know i missed my exercise class but so what?

245 replies

notacooldad · 02/03/2025 18:32

I pay in advance for my Pilates class. It is £30 a session
You can cancel the class as long as you give 24hrs notice, if not you lose out.
Quite reasonablely you can't be more than 5 mins late.
On Thursday I had an appointment before my class which over ran significantly, on top of that I encountered three lots of temporary lights and traffic has backed up.
By the time I got to the car park I was 10 mins late. There was no point rushing, I'm late, I've missed out. There isn't a reception where I could have explained this to, just the instructor doing her thing with the group.
I went home.
I got an email which was,imo , quite snotty, telling me i should have let them know if i wasn't going to turn up so they could have given that place to someone on the waiting list.

My feeling is I've paid for that space, whether I was there or not.

If they gave it to someone else they would have had £30 from them as ' as a place has become available '
I wouldn't have got my money back as it clearly says no refunds if you are late or a no show.
Therefore, I feel like the sharp tone of the email is a bit ridiculous. The company hasn't lost out and as far as I can imagine, most people want to turn up and don't deliberately miss classes once they've paid for them.

What do others think?

OP posts:
notacooldad · 02/03/2025 20:51

*Dollydaydream100 · Today 20:43
Me too, worth every penny! Still wouldn't pay £30 for a Pilates lesson though - because I do it for free on YouTube!

I added later that it is reformer pilates. I know it is expensive 😩. However I'm prepared to give other things up for now.
I wish I had the inclination to do home work outs but I start one and then think, oh, I'll just put the dishwasher on or ' blimey the carpet needs a good hoover!'

OP posts:
PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:50

biscuitsandbooks · 02/03/2025 20:43

Yes, but they still wanted OP to e-mail ahead of time so they could give her space to someone else...

No, they didn't. The email wasn't written specifically and personally for the OP. It is sent to every no-show and obviously doesn't apply to the people who don't know in advance that they won't be there.

latetothefisting · 02/03/2025 20:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I don't really see why she should?
She's paid upfront for the class.
The teacher got paid regardless.
The other users received their class.
They weren't disturbed by her arriving late.
Nobody (other than OP) lost out by her non-attendance, if anything they probably had a bit more space and % of the tutor's individual time by the class not being full. Why the need for an apology?

Yes it might be nice if she contacted them to tell them why she was late but she would only have been able to do so retrospectively so it wouldn't have made any difference to them. She didn't know she was going to be late so they couldn't have filled from the waiting list - and if they had they would have got paid twice (which, while understandably good for a business, they have no entitlement to!)

Dollydaydream100 · 02/03/2025 20:48

notacooldad · 02/03/2025 20:46

@PandaTime

Hell no lol. I can't even see my feet.
Hence me spending nearly £200 a month on Mounjaro. In this economy! 😱
At the risk of hijacking my own thread, how are you finding your Mounjaro journey? I don't think i know anyone in real life doing it.
I'm intrigued but nervous about it.

Get over to the WLI pages OP - I've been on it 6 weeks and it's transformed my life.

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:47

Dollydaydream100 · 02/03/2025 20:43

Me too, worth every penny! Still wouldn't pay £30 for a Pilates lesson though - because I do it for free on YouTube!

I don't even do it for free 😂I'm tempted to get one of those magic fitness mirrors, but I just know it will be more mirror than magic.

notacooldad · 02/03/2025 20:46

@PandaTime

Hell no lol. I can't even see my feet.
Hence me spending nearly £200 a month on Mounjaro. In this economy! 😱
At the risk of hijacking my own thread, how are you finding your Mounjaro journey? I don't think i know anyone in real life doing it.
I'm intrigued but nervous about it.

OP posts:
ALovelyShadeofMauve · 02/03/2025 20:46

Respond saying “It was made quite clear to me that, if more than five minutes late, I would not be admitted to the class. Once I knew I would be late it was too late to let anyone know - and too late for you to sell my place to anyone else without breaching your own policy.

If you are are suggesting you will sell places to members on a waiting list should anyone cancel their booking, please let me know how this affects your “no refunds” policy, as I’m sure you will agree it is unethical to sell the same spot in a class twice.”

TheMorels · 02/03/2025 20:46

£30 a class? Bloody hell. My reformer classes are £14.

latetothefisting · 02/03/2025 20:44

Iamallowedtodisagreewithyou · 02/03/2025 18:37

YANBU i often just pay up for small things for the convenience of having them if i want them.

um...did you read the post?
OP has paid, upfront. They aren't asking her for more money.

biscuitsandbooks · 02/03/2025 20:43

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:41

No they didn't. It is a generic email sent to everyone who doesn't turn up.

Yes, but they still wanted OP to e-mail ahead of time so they could give her space to someone else...

Teencentral · 02/03/2025 20:43

My monthly pilates email today said this too, really pissed me off, if I pay what does it matter if I can't make it? If she resales it she be getting paid double ( plus in the current circumstances, would not get enough notice to resale it) I've been going weekly for 5 years, recently due to road works, I've missed 2 of a recent block, instructor knows this as a few of us have not booked the next block while the traffic works are ongoing, I having been considering joining a gym instead and this snotty email has cemented my thoughts on trailing the gym.

Dollydaydream100 · 02/03/2025 20:43

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:40

I have a feeling PandaTime is a disgruntled Pilates instructor 😂

Hell no lol. I can't even see my feet. Hence me spending nearly £200 a month on Mounjaro. In this economy! 😱

Me too, worth every penny! Still wouldn't pay £30 for a Pilates lesson though - because I do it for free on YouTube!

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:41

biscuitsandbooks · 02/03/2025 20:36

But they wanted her to e-mail ahead of time so they could give her place to someone else Confused

No they didn't. It is a generic email sent to everyone who doesn't turn up.

Newmumburnout · 02/03/2025 20:41

I agree with you OP, you paid and you won't get a refund. That is the consequence of you not being able to make it. Obviously some people will know in advance if they can't make it and it's courtsey to let them know. Some times it will be due to unforeseen circumstances close to the time. They should only send an email if your a repeat offender I think.

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:40

I have a feeling PandaTime is a disgruntled Pilates instructor 😂

Hell no lol. I can't even see my feet. Hence me spending nearly £200 a month on Mounjaro. In this economy! 😱

ThisFluentBiscuit · 02/03/2025 20:40

Oooh, I hate it when companies won't give a refund but still sell the spare space, so they get double the money. For this reason, I won't let any company know I'm not turning up, if this is the set-up. Why should they make double at my expense?

biscuitsandbooks · 02/03/2025 20:36

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:04

Eh? She arrived 10 mins late. She had plenty of time from then to send an email to explain why she didn't make it to the class. Then, after the class when the instructor went to send out her emails to the no-shows, she would have seen the OP's apology and not included her in the email.

I'm baffled that so many people would just give no reason for missing a meeting. Try that with a childminder or a music teacher like I said and see what happens.

But they wanted her to e-mail ahead of time so they could give her place to someone else Confused

MrsPeregrine · 02/03/2025 20:33

I think £30 for a Pilates class is extortionate! No wonder they were keen to sell another place to someone, but a bit cheeky given you had paid for the space. I’m surprised they have a waiting list for the class if that’s what they charge. Honestly, just save your money and do a class on YouTube for free.

notacooldad · 02/03/2025 20:29

@PandaTime
So why are you whinging about an auto-generated email as if it was personally addressed to you?
Not whinging, just having a convo about the general tone of an email being really sharp.
I would post it but it may be outing in our area.
People may miss appointments/ classes/ meetings for many reasons that they wish they weren't happening to them. An email treating you like a naughty school child isn't great if you are going through a tough situation.

OP posts:
Dollydaydream100 · 02/03/2025 20:27

VaccineSticker · 02/03/2025 20:20

People have busy lives, some people have complicated circumstances or end like getting stuck in awful traffic and not make a class for fault of their own. No one like to cancel an expensive class that they voluntarily choose to do and pay for.
Texting later to apologise is nice but not needed. The instructor’s email is worded in a manner that shows disrespect for the client and disregard for the circumstances that they might have stopped them for attending as if they deliberately missed the lesson.
what is going to do next? Report the OP to OFSTED for poor attendance? She’s already been fined billed for the session 🤣🤣🤣

I have a feeling PandaTime is a disgruntled Pilates instructor 😂

Drfosters · 02/03/2025 20:26

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:13

It is not the instructor's responsibility to chase people to get their reasons for not turning up. In the absence of an explanation, every no-show gets the same generic email.

Why does a no show need an email? They paid, they didn’t show. The instructor was paid anyway.

PandaTime · 02/03/2025 20:23

notacooldad · 02/03/2025 20:21

@PandaTime
Eh? She arrived 10 mins late. She had plenty of time from then to send an email to explain why she didn't make it to the class. Then, after the class when the instructor went to send out her emails to the no-shows, she would have seen the OP's apology and not included her in the email.
I was a bit stressed from sn unexpected consultant chst, stressed with unexpected road works and gutted when I pulled up on the car osrk to realise all my rushing was in vain.
I live a few minutes away. The email was sent within a few minutes of the class starting, it's auto generated. The email was in my inbox before I got through my front door looking at the timings!
There is no one to phone.

I'm sure most people wouldn't sit on a carpark writing emails when they could do that when they get home in a few minutes time.

Actually I sent an email with a query when I was looking around for classes a few weeks ago and they still haven't replied to that!

So why are you whinging about an auto-generated email as if it was personally addressed to you?

ThanksItHasPockets · 02/03/2025 20:23

Dollydaydream100 · 02/03/2025 20:17

Nope, especially not in this economy.

Ridiculous comment. I really don't think there are that many people who'd pay 30 quid for a Pilates class - the instructor would do well to remember this.

It's such a moot point anyway. The Op had paid. It makes not a blind bit of difference whether she turned up or not - they were greedily trying to fill a space that they'd already received the money for. If the op had emailed and they'd filled the space there's not a chance in hell they'd have offered her a refund.

Methinks if they send out rude emails regularly they won't have many customers left before long. I know I wouldn't return and would be telling everyone how snotty they were.

There is a list of people literally waiting to pay £30 for this Pilates class.

thismummydrinksgin · 02/03/2025 20:21

£30 a session!!!! That's crazy. I agree if they aren't refunding you sod them!

isaknowsbest · 02/03/2025 20:21

To be honest OP while I may be pissed off about it I would stay away from getting too detailed about it. I would reply to the e mail in a very simple way saying that you arrived late on this occasion due to x y and z and because of the late policy you left. I'm not one for sucking things up but think you could make your points simply without getting into the details of what they could do or not. Take the higher ground especially with such an activity 😊

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