It’s a child maintenance one

@WinterSunflowers well then I presume if he became unemployed and you went through cms then you would only get a pittance! you can either look forward to that or get a job to enable you to keep yourself in the way you have become accustomed!

When the money is gone, it’s gone.

if he has no income your cm percentage will be 0.

you will need to consider how you’ll manage without it. Either by budgeting or working.

i know you say you’ve “never needed” to work as between dla, cms etc you have a decent income, but what happens in the future?

once your kids have left home, what will you live on? Do you have a pension? You may not need to work now, but it’s a bit short sighted not to be working toward the future. Even if your child with dla stays at home, will their dla be enough for you both to live on? Are you expecting that to support you indefinitely?

you have 6 months. Get yourself future proofed. Maximise your income and work opportunities, get care in place if you need it. Then if your ex doesn’t get a job, or is made redundant in future, or worse cannot work through ill health or death, you can support yourself.

you can’t live off him forever.

When my children were mid-teens I couldn't work full-time due to their incredibly demanding medical and neurodevelopmental issues. Now they are young adults, and I cannot work full-time because I am caring for elderly parents with dementia. So DH is "subsidising" me working part time - and I am "subsidising" him working full-time, because I am fulfilling the family obligations that he can't. It's very simplistic to portray OP as a lazy freeloader when we know so little about her life, other than that she thinks a non-resident father shouldn't have less responsibility for his children than she does.

It sounds like hes a decent man and has done the right thing by you and your kids for ten years, enabling you to not work full time and start your own business etc. You are not coming across well here and I think you need to give him a break. If he's giving you 1000 for six months then no, he shouldn't give you a share of his notice money on top of this. He needs to use that to live until.he finds something else and you should plan financially incase he cannot continue this for a time. Talk to him if that happens and see what's going to be affordable and work for you both. It likely wouldn't be long term if he was looking for another job. There are so many women on here who don't get a penny towards their kids or have exes who hide their earnings to pay the minimum. He sounds like he's tried to do the right thing by you. Also get a proper job.

given that your children are mid teens, maybe he feels there's no need to be subsidising you to be a full time stay at home parent dabbling in self employment.

Whether he is legally obliged to pay it or not would depend on whether it's treated as income - redundancy payments aren't considered income so not included in CMA calculations.

Essentially, if he's been given six months' pay in lieu of notice, he should either give you one large payment or six months' payments out of it.

After that if he doesn't have work he should still be contributing to his children's costs as he is able. But obviously if his savings run out, he won't be able to do that, or it will be massively reduced.

I would probably plan to give my DC money directly when they turn 18 rather than subsidising their other parent working part time?

Yes I would, and when my husband was a SAHD after being made redundant we obviously continued paying maintenance to DSC's mum. But he's NOT obliged to and that's the environment the OP has to work within. He's paying £1k a month for 6 months - I don't think this man is doing too much wrong tbh. OP could also get a full time job.

Should be?

Sorry but you're going to be fucked if it doesn't.

And as you know, everyone with their own business expects it to grow, until it doesn't.

Sounds like a bit of a wing and a prayer and very late in the day, considering your teens only have a couple of years of maintenance left.

I think you need a plan and a job op. You are coming across here as really grabby - he should not be seen as the gravy train he clearly is. He has been paying more than he has to, which is quite right if he can afford to. Unfortunately for you if he can’t afford to, he doesn’t have to. Your kids are older now - maybe time to think about the future when he won’t be paying you anything and you need to take responsibility…

Again, are we accepting as normal that a father just washes his hands of his children once the legal minimum obligation expires? Do you plan on cutting off your children on their 18th birthday because you legally can? Mind-boggling.

YABU. I think you should also consider planning for once the kids are older and CMS stops completely.

@SapphireOpal if I lost my job, I would have to support my children out of any savings I might have until I could find another job...wouldn't you? Why shouldn't he?

You must've known not working full time because you've never 'had to' was going to come back and bite you though?

What are your plans for when he no longer has to pay in just a few years time?

That was very kind of him. He's under no obligation to though.

What's your plan for when the kids are 18 and he no longer pays anything?

You can suggest it, but he's not going to be earning any money so are you expecting him to keep paying you £500 a month from his savings?

What he's proposing sounds entirely fair. You've got 6 months to find more work and your kids are mid teens so you're not having to work around school runs etc.

I really do not see ANY problem here.

Surely you are better with 1000 a month. I'm assuming he needs to work and will therefore be looking for a job so the money will continue once he has employment?

As your kids are teens you should be looking at how you will support yourself once the CMA stops. Have you thought about that time? Maybe working full time to support yourself?