It’s a child maintenance one

"Again, are we accepting as normal that a father just washes his hands of his children once the legal minimum obligation expires? Do you plan on cutting off your children on their 18th birthday because you legally can? Mind-boggling."

Are we accepting as normal a parent of 2 teens with no high level care needs who should also be contributing 1000 pm to raise her own children but instead relies on money intended for her children and benefits from the state to be a woman of leisure justified as 100% availability for appointments 95% of which the working parent attends as well?

The bottom line though is that there is clearly a risk with maintenance, the payer can lose their job, have a health issue etc etc and the money stops

Also of course you need to be ready when children turn 18

My ex wife clearly never planned for these events or at least never gave the impression of having done so, if anything quite the reverse

You aren't entitled to any of it. He can reassess with the cms once he's made redundant. If he's not working they will order very little to be paid.
What do you intend to do in a few years when the money will stop? More importantly you need to make yourself financially independent from his money so when it stops you won't feel it.
I made sure when mine stopped it wasn't needed and did this by working full time and taking promotions to cover the money myself

yep technically that £1000 is for half the kids expenses. So mum should also be contributing £1000 to the kids, after covering her own expenses.

if she’s not working she’s contributing nothing financially.

as for not working to “be available” just in case- when the child’s care needs are bimonthly appointments and an occasional hospital stay, that seems entirely daft to me. She could have got a job, building up her financial security and independence, not forgetting her pension. I have worked many jobs and I’ve never come across an employer that won’t allow time off for a hospitalised child.

o/p I hope this doesn’t come back to bite you in old age when your income has suffered and you have little pension. You may not be working now but you may find yourself working into your 70’s instead to compensate.

Do you really think that the full £1000 a month is going to the childrens expenses though? No chance

You're not entitled to any of his redundancy payment so he's being quite generous given he doesn't know how long it will take him to find another job. Perhaps it's time to look for more lucrative employment yourself?

Yes, I agree, something similar happened recently with my ex. I was relieved he didn't just stop immediately and pocket the payout which I'd never have known about. I guess you need to trust that if he does start working again before the 6m run out he should pay you more for those overlap months

father has missed a few appointments due to work and when we have had to stay in hospital he managed fewer of the overnights due to having to work. I decided that being available was of more value than working

@WinterSunflowers

What about now though?

It sounds like despite you being divorced you've been aligned on the need for you to be available and care for DC. And he's contributed accordingly.
He seems like a decent sort and is continuing to be decent. I guess all PP are advising is that ultimately these payments will cease and that's a massive drop in income for you. You presumably have little or no pension, so that also is going to be state pension only as it stands today. This leaves you in a precarious position all round, as you've seen he's been let go of 2 jobs recently and therefore his work isn't super stable. If he has little or no income, he has nothing to give you. So you need to start planning for your future ASAP really

It's very normal for a parent to give money directly to DC after they are 18 and when they are at university. My DD's husband has divorced parents and his Dad and step Mum sent him the money every month that prior to 18 his Dad had sent to his exw.

So you want half the notice money because you think actually he'll get another job quite quick and thus still end up paying you the £1000 a month anyway from a new salary.
You are greedy as fuck!!!

He sounds like a very fair exh to me. He's paying £1k a month for 2 teen DC. He may get another job in 6 months and will be able to continue to pay maintenance. You as the other parent are also still supposed to be supporting your DC financially. It's not all down to 1 parent. In a few years when DC reached 18 and maintenance is likely to be paid direct to DC not to you, how will you manage then?

O/p has stated up thread that there are no high level care needs- the care needs are a hospital appointment every other month and an occasional inpatient stay.

which the dad attends 95% of.

so no excuse for not working.

When you have a child on DLA you might have to accept the fact that they never leave home

Get a full time job which most people seem to manage

That's ridiculous...
The point is, that the children will be adults once they reach the age of 18, and will either be in full time work in which case they can contribute to the household expense, or at university, in which case their father can offer some support direct to them.
No one is cutting anyone else out.

Some of his redundancy will not be classed as taxable pay so he is being very reasonable to honour the usual payments. I was quite shocked by your expectation to part of the payout.

OP what will you when you want to retire? Do you have a pension??

My thoughts to.

I think he's been more than reasonable.

If you want more then maybe look at your employment options as it sounds like your children are old enough.

Maybe also consider he may need the money since he's out of work and will also have bills to pay.

Reverse.

The OP sounds incredibly lazy to be honest

No you would not be reasonable to say when the notice money is gone he should do that again.