Boys going to the gents by themselves what age?

My ds10 has been going into men's toilets for the last 2 years or so.

The chances of anything happening are so tiny and it's good for him to build up independence. I've been letting him build it up in other ways more recently, ie leaving him home alone for up to 30 minutes, letting him go for short 20 minute walks by himself etc.

We are too overprotective of our children in the real world but under protective in the virtual world.

I send Y3s into men's toilets on school trips. It honestly never occurred to me that you wouldn't, until I went on a trip with infants and they all used the ladies (female only staff). Its ridiculous that women's toilets aren't built to be bigger than men's given more children (and a higher percentage of elderly people) use them.

This

Or the 10 year old could use the mens as he should be and the bloke in a wig could also stay out of the ladies too.

@Gymrabbit While 50 year old blokes in wigs are free to use the Ladies then apparently no they don't. At least the hypothetical 10 year old boy is accompanied by his Mum and there to use the toilets as they were designed for, so we can assume no actual physical threat aside from some embarrassment. Not ideal, but the best of a few less than ideal scenarios.

It is. This is good parenting

Yes, you’re an adult woman. But how about 11 year old girls who would be mortified to be doing a poo or changing sanitary wear in a cubicle next to a similar age boy. Don’t they matter?

Your son sounds perfectly normal and understands boundaries since as you say ‘he was mortified’ to be there.
This is not the same as the other poster at all.

My dd has been going by herself since 7. Ds is
only 4 but already objects to coming into the ladies with me. I cant imagine he will agree to come in past 7. It’s good to build independence up.

This is a leap.

Eldest age my ds came into the ladies with me was age 9....he was mortified...he kept proclaiming loudly so everyone could hear that he didn't want to be in there. The experience didn't turn him into an entitled narcissist.

The reason he was, was because the gents toilets opened with a door and then had a very long corridor to the cubicles and urinals...which meant I couldn't hover by the door and have him hear me and vice versa. Like I said earlier I was very pleased I made that decision as later on I read about how a teenager was assaulted in those shopping centre toilets.

As an adult Woman I can't imagine being uncomfortable with any pre-pubescent / primary school aged boy accompanied by his Mum in the Ladies toilets, and I've not in my 41 years ever seen any Woman with hands dripping in blood at the sink, so while I don't doubt it's a possibility I'm not sure it's a hill to die on.

My DS is far too young for this to be a real worry at the moment but honestly if any old bloke in a skirt can happily use the ladies then I'll just wear trousers, adopt a deep voice, and accompany him to the gents if I need to 🤷🏻‍♀️

The gym where my son used to swim had an incident of a man filming children while they changed on many occasions before he was caught. They changed the rules and allowed boys up to 12 to change in cubicles within the women's changing room if they were with their mothers. You cant assume public changing and toileting spaces are safe and it's important that people respect others' feelings around this.

Agreed

You literally said you don’t give a shit if the presence of your son makes women and girls uncomfortable. It’s not a straw man at all. You are teaching him to feel as you do that the feelings of women and girls aren’t important at all.

Lovely example of a straw man argument there.

And it’s exactly this kind of attitude that leads to narcissistic men who think their rights trump everyone else’s.
You ‘don’t give a shit’ about the feelings of women or girls. They must all
bow down to the needs of your son.
What a disgusting misogynistic attitude to have.

The first time I let ds go into the men's toilets by himself (age 8), he was immediately confronted by the sight of one man giving another a blow job. He ran out very upset and it took hours to get him to tell me what had happened in there. That's why some of us worry about our little boys going into the mens.

I take my 9 year old son into the ladies if I don’t feel the men’s is safe and I will continue to do so. Couldn’t give a shit about it making anyone uncomfortable, my child’s safety is more important than someone’s feelings.

At the soft play 4, busy shopping centre 6-8, tube station or park, er when they are full grown? Wouldn't want them in the ladies past 8 though so difficult!

This thread is hilarious.

8 years old although he is disabled so we will often use the disabled toilets

About 7

Mine is 16 and 6’6 so I’ll probably continue to let him pee in the gents

My eldest DS is only 4 but I can’t imagine him still coming in with me aged 8. He insists on his own cubicle as it is