Boys going to the gents by themselves what age?

Where the hell did I say 17 was a child? Shit I had my own child whe I was 16 😂

My point was on another thread people were saying 6 and 7 year old boys should no way be allowed to enter the ladies toilet. Apparently they should go into the gents alone lest they make a lady feel "uncomfortable".

Some statistics for you around 95-99% of pedophiles are male. A lot of them do not necessarily care if their victim is male or female.

So no I will not send my 7 year old into the men's toilet alone just so you lot don't feel "uncomfortable"

I don't think anyone is interested in you changing your tampon or your bowel movements including pre pubescent boys @YankSplaining can't say I've ever paid attention to what another person is doing in the toilet

Another reference to “on the verge of” - so again, you’re talking about a prepubescent boy.

Why does it matter to you whether it’s a boy or a girl hearing these things? What difference does it make?

I think not from age 8 onwards. There is a reason why they say this at swimming pools. Girls can start puberty earlier. I think most girls 9/10 year old girls would be mortified meeting a boy from her class at the local ladies toilet and so would the boy be when it went round the class that mummy took him to the toilet.

What ‘consequences’ will it have?
Will they become violent or more likely to carry out sexual assaults than females?

Fenale toilets are for women, girls and very small boys. It’s that simple.Women and their toilets are not shields for every male who may be vulnerable, otherwise where does it end.
16 year olds in the ladies? gay men in the ladies. Their vulnerability is little different to a 12 year old boy.

Becsue the children are disabled?

The men's but they go with a friend, never alone.

Oh gosh, I'm sorry to hear that your ds was assaulted...that's absolutely terrible.

Agree with everything you said

How old? Is there a group of them using the loo or just one at a time? Where is the loo? Soft play? A train station? Really does depend

Genuine question for boy mums..

If your son is at a birthday party or out with a friend (with their parents) or on a group trip.. but no male adult... what toilet do you think they should use?

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. Every mother should assess each toilet and each child herself before making any decisions. I say this as the mother of a 13 year old who was assaulted in a men’s toilet. Abuse involves shame and with shame comes hiding. I strongly suspect flashing, watching, groping etc towards young boys in public toilets happens a lot more than we think.

Do not base your child’s safeguarding on MN threads.

The suggestions I’ve seen on this thread for using the disabled toilets are for those with boys with special needs. If they are not be able to use the toilet alone then they are disabled and can use the disabled toilets.

My friend has a 15 year old son with autism. He can now use the men’s alone most of the time. But even now if she doesn’t feel he will be safe in the men’s he uses the disabled toilets. He’s absolutely huge now (around 6ft4) and even though he’s very young mentally she understands it’s totally inappropriate for him to be in the women’s toilets. So he uses the men’s if it’s a safer place and the disabled if not.

Why is it not acceptable to take a young pre pubescent boy into the ladies? But it’s ok to use the disabled toilets??

@CheeseWisely just because you don't feel uncomfortable it don't mean others don't. I posted not long before you that I had that experience and felt uncomfortable

I want to be able to have a bowel movement or open a tampon without a listening audience of boys on the verge of puberty, thanks.

My boys had SN and were about 10 or 11.
However there are a lot more gender neutral toilets about now which makes it easier.

Ooh don't you know by now boys don't matter
They are all rapists and abusers from birth

Why on earth would you want to protect such a creature

I'm a 3DS mum

Who is sick to death of the way mumsnet treats boys like they need no protection

I'm a girl

Why the fuck would I mind if a woman brought her 9 year old boy in to the women's changing rooms

He's a boy and a human being

The bias against boys in this country will have consequences

Or the 10 year old could use the mens as he should be and the bloke in a wig could also stay out of the ladies too.

Of course and in an ideal world that would be the case every time, but this thread has demonstrated that not everything is ideal. Some public toilets are hangouts for people you wouldn't want your 10 year old unaccompanied and out of sight around, and some 10 year olds need a bit more assistance than others.

What I was saying was that in the circumstance that a slightly older boy than the largely accepted 7/8 was in the ladies with his Mum due to reasons outside of their control then I couldn't get too worked up about it.

IMO a boy using the facilities with his Mum / female carer is totally different to a boy or Man choosing to use them alone.

This sounds about right to me. 8

Will you care in a year or two if some young girl is uncomfortable by your sons presence (for whatever reason), tells her brother who’s just outside who proceeds to beat the shit out of your boy in front of you?

Thanks for your reply. I have seen other boys in there, with mums, so I thought I was doing the right thing. Just to note, we normally use disabled toilets, in supermarkets/days out/food places. When they are available ( it isn't always an option) It is generally just at the pool. Mothers smile at him so there has never been an issue. Until I found this thread. X

Agree with this.

How unbelievably embarrassing to be taken to the ladies toilet by Mummy when the boy is ready to go to high school.

You need to take him to disabled or family changing.

The ladies is not acceptable

Ok, so I have a tall 10 year old boy, almost 11. He is a sen child, verbal but highly vulnerable with some toileting needs. There is no way he would be safe in a male toilets alone. Obviously when his dad or brother are around then that's where he goes. We regularly go swimming. I've never heard of the "age 8" rule. I check there is no one in the ladies that's changing, then I let him go in a cubicle, door closed but unlocked. Haven't had any comments yet, but a look of confusion as he left and a younger girl entered. There is a disabled toilet available but it contains all the showering/bed changing equipment, and I feel like physically disabled people have a priority. Reading all your comments, I'm not unsure what to do. He can not safely go to male toilets alone.

In child friendly places, my DS8 has gone into the men's from a very young age but I still bring him into the women's public toilets. This wouldn't be the done thing among his friends so I'll have a rethink. I'm probably being overly protective as a couple of close neighbours were recently convicted as paedophiles.