55 year old female Reader interested in teenage boys

That's creepy and inappropriate and you should do whatever you would instantly do if this was a male lecturer behaving like this towards a female student.

👋 School safeguarding person here. OP, you need to report this as a low level safeguarding concern to the DSL and let them decide what to do with it. There will be a process for this at your institution & you need to report what she said, verbatim if possible, without opinion or judgement. This will be anonymous and the exact words will never be recounted back to her. She hasn’t broken the law but her behaviour as a person in a position of trust is inappropriate at best. There may have been other incidences that the DSL is aware of and this may help them to get a bigger picture.

Surprised in a non-critical/judgemental way of this - I would never give my private number to students, or use my private phone for work (including email) under any circumstances.

It looks like she has taken steps to make it more than a fantasy.

Maybe rules are different at different places because of previous incidents or something?

@Takemebacktowhen is this student a foreign student btw? Only ask because it adds another layer to the power imbalance.

Why because I won't tell tales on what is at the moment no more than a middle-aged woman's fantasy?

I'd say stay out of it until you have evidence of improper behaviour.
If you know her well, maybe have a word with her, tell her how inappropriate it is?

Why do you give them your number? Why can't they email you? I'd say this is a grey area and I wouldn't do this.

Wow shame on you! You'd fly under the radar of misuse of power and abuse because of the state of HE atm.
Have a chat with yourself!
I work in safeguarding btw and its people like you that I judge and am in absolute shock of.

I think you've made your thread title provocative on purpose.

It comes over as paedophilia. I'm sure this was intentional so you need to consider why you've written it like that.

Most people do not know what a 'Reader' is.

I'm not condoning her behaviour but you appear to want to sensationalise it by your use of words.

Talk to her first if you're close. That might be all it needs.

There may not be a law against it but it is highly likely there is a rule against it at this institution.

Or, talk to her first?

Nothing has happened yet.

The first step with a colleague you're close to is to 'have a word', as they say.

You need to confidently log your concerns with the head of faculty.

I give students my private number, male and female. Perfectly normal and accepted practice where I work.

I am a grandmother to a teenage student and reading this OP has truly sickened me. This lecturer is in a position of trust which she is seemingly abusing. If she were my 'colleague' I would have no reservations whatsoever in reporting her.

It's inappropriate and I certainly wouldn't want to mess about with teenagers but he is 18, there's no law against it. He's legally an adult and you can't police relationships between adults.

A Reader is a grade above a senior lecturer at a university. I wouldn’t have thought they’d have them at a sixth form college.

@Takemebacktowhen Are you in the UK(looking at the timing of your post?)

Just saying in case the rules differ in other countries.

I think this is pretty simple.

If you're close to this colleague, why can't you have a word?

It's surely easy to say, 'Jane, I hope you don't mind me saying this......but I when you spoke to me about X (student) and how lovely you thought he was, sharing a taxi and giving him your number, I felt very uneasy. Maybe this is just a cougar fantasy (hahaha) but it made me think and feel concerned. If you were to take it further (and I'm sure you won't ) then you appreciate it's a serious issue with consequences.'

You are absolutely obliged to notify the safeguarging lead at the institution where she works.

Safeguarding is relevant in amy scenario where there is an imbalance of power. Even if the teen is legally an adult they are vulnerable in relationship to a lecturer at their place of employment.

Everyone has an absolute duty to notify when it comes to Safeguarding. It's not the same as "reporting to the police", you aren't being a "grass" you are just making the appropriate person aware, and they will have the training and responsibility to work out whether further action is necessary.

I think you should do whatever you would do if it was a man talking about a young female student like that. She sounds absolutely disgusting. If it was my son she was talking about I would really want you to report it.

My husband is a uni lecturer. He is not allowed to even email them formal emails after 6pm or on weekends. He would definitely not be allowed to give him his number.

Your friend sounds like a predator.

6th formers =/= university students.

When I went back to H.E as an adult learner I found I respected got on very well with one of the lecturers. We were around the same age, similar life circumstances, and I thought we may end up being friends.

When I asked for her social media information one day she very politely declined. She said that as she was a lecturer, and even though we were the same age, there could potentially be an abuse of power. So she was not allowed to share social media or socialise with students.

This woman you are talking about sounds like she is in the wrong job. The creepy race fetishisation is the distubing cherry on top. It is worrying and may leave some students very vulnerable.

Yes i definitely thought university not sixth form due to that. And that does make a difference. Seems like someone on this thread has already recognised the actual person being discussed so things could get interesting for the OP. She’s probably wise to get this thread deleted.

Imagine if this was a man and an 18 year old girl. The imbalance of power would be more striking. Treat this exactly the same.

There will be an education manual or policy which will outline staff/staff relationships. Most universities prohibit these. Mine strongly discourages, but doesn't prohibit, regardless, it must be reported and declared. Report to your line manager.