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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Woken up by adult kids AGAIN.... AIBU

457 replies

rubberduck68 · 01/03/2025 10:04

My adult son still lives at home (he and his sister who is at Uni are moving in with their dad in the summer) but I just want to check if IABU. He and his GF are both early twenties, and she does stay over sometimes, which I am fine with. I have made the house rules that it's no more than three nights a week, but she's starting working at a nightclub and coming back at 3.00 am and waking me and my dog up. I have asked them both to stop, in fact I got them both up really early the last time they did it and sent her home. She did it again this week and I talked to her about it and she apologised. Last night, 2.30 am out she gets from an Uber and they are banging about downstairs! I spoke to my son who apologised. I've just asked him to send her home now, and he said I am "not very understanding." I feel awkward and uncomfortable in my own bloody home. Historically whenever I have put a boundary down with these two I am called to a meeting by them a few days later where she claims I don't like her, so I've cut that off with him today and said I won't be doing that, it's her behaviour I don't like. My son't argument is that he shouldn't have a curfew as an adult which I agree with, but I made the point that she doesn't live here! AIBU? I would never have dared behave like his in my parent's home at any age!

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 01/03/2025 10:15

Make the point it will be a lot easier to like her once they're living elsewhere a d you're nit being woken up.

Garlicgarlicgarlic · 01/03/2025 10:14

Don't indulge these ridiculously entitled people with more meetings and chats.

The girlfriend is incapable of behaving with manners so natural consequences means she can go to her own house. If this isn't acceptable to your son he is free to live wherever he wants.

mewkins · 01/03/2025 10:14

What the hell?! In the past she's called a meeting about what you're doing in YOUR home?! She should absolutely be going back to her own home after doing a late shift. It's ridiculous.

VickyEadieofThigh · 01/03/2025 10:12

She's a guest who has made herself unwelcome. YANBU - she can only stay if she arrives by 11pm.

Motheranddaughter · 01/03/2025 10:09

Tell them straight,these are the rules and if they don’t like it they can move out

AnneLovesGilbert · 01/03/2025 10:07

Tell them she’s not welcome over anymore. If he doesn’t like it he can move out now. Cheeky shits.

WellsAndThistles · 01/03/2025 10:06

Take house keys off them and set a curfew. E.g if they knock after 11pm you won't be answering.

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