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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To let my early teens DD go without braces

152 replies

UndertakeDrive35 · 28/02/2025 21:39

My DD has an overbite, but she’s stated that she doesn’t feel it’s causing any issues and doesn’t mind going without orthodontic treatment (meaning fixed braces.) For context, the orthodontist advised traditional braces the last time we visited (last July), and apart from the overbite she does have some smaller incisors/canines however that can be fixed with veneers and not braces - she has had a meltdown every time braces have been mentioned because she says it will cause her to be extremely ugly and very unlovable (and i know how crucial confidence is for teens especially younger ones!! 😓) and even though I stress that they’re temporary, she says that even a year of feeling ugly and horrible about herself will be internalised and leave her damaged in the future, which I do actually agree with seeing as the treatment isn’t completely medically necessarily. I must mention she’s also autistic + the dentist said invisalign might not be viable and has said she would have thoughts abut harming herself should she get braces because she would feel so ugly that she needs to die and she would have no purpose in the world and she’s already quite insecure. I was deeply upset to hear this and there is nothing that I can do to console her, so I think that I should leave it seeing as she’s fine in her current state, but people i know in real life have disagreed with me, told me to sit her down and make her do it!!!! AIBU???

OP posts:
HowAmITheCatsGranny · 28/02/2025 21:43

Based on your title I was going to say YABU, simply because as a teen I wasn’t super keen to get braces, which my mum didn’t push, and I’ve had endless dental problems as an adult. However, it definitely sounds like there is more to it in your case. And your dd is having a pretty extreme reaction. It sounds like she might need some mental health support before revisiting the issue?

JemimaFlubberCluck · 28/02/2025 21:42

Braces are not compulsory. Ask “people” how they’d feel if someone made them do something that was going to distress them so much.