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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask friends to still pay for both of them

30 replies

GotThatFriYayFeeling · 28/02/2025 11:38

Boyfriends birthday at the end of the month & I have organised a surprise weekend away with some of his friends & partners

There's about 10 of us going, it was originally booked in Nov, everyone was added to a WhatsApp and all agreed date/venue

I paid for the whole lot up front and said it was XXX per person

Last week I discovered one of his friends partners can no longer come. There was a mix up and he has double booked himself and is now away doing something else

No one had paid me any money yet but it's payday weekend & I need to prod people. I don't know whether to say it's now £39 more for everyone or tell his friend that she still needs to pay 2x for herself and her fella.

No one is sharing rooms, all singletons have their own room.

Genuinely stuck. I feel morally they should pay but it's a fair chunk of money.

YANBU - the friend should still pay 2x
YABU - everyone takes the hit

OP posts:
Changingplace · 28/02/2025 11:49

I would ask the person who’s cancelled first, just be really honest - as you can’t come now that would push up everyone’s price, are you still going to cover the cost you’d agreed to? And see what they say.

pikkumyy77 · 28/02/2025 11:45

Isn’t it essentially a per room cost? Just tell her she is responsible for the full cost but she may drop out entirely. or cover the missing fee yourself to prevent the whole event from crashing leaving you with the full cost to bear. You can’t be sure that all the others will cough up an extra 50 quid.

BleachedJumper · 28/02/2025 11:42

Honestly, This is why you get the money at the point of booking and not at a later date.

I feel like it should come down to the individual who won’t be attending and the organiser to come to a decision. No one else should be subsiding.

No33 · 28/02/2025 11:41

You've paid, and had nothing paid by anyone yet!? 😬

DrummingMousWife · 28/02/2025 11:40

Put it out for the group to decide. They have cancelled and dropped everyone in it, I would ask what the group now want to do.