To ask friends to still pay for both of them

Can't you just ask everyone to pay the prices you told them back in November?
And if flakey-friend gets back in touch to say that she thinks she should pay less because her DP's no longer coming, tell her that her (double) room still costs £x, but if she can find a singleton who wants to swap with her and pay more that's fine with you.

I would not put it out to the group to decide as it’s a bit awkward. I would think the obvious response is the drop out has to pay. If I was the drop out I would have just said sorry I double booked, but I will ofc cover the cost.

She has to pay. She said they were going, its not one else's fault her DP is double booked.

Id be raging if I was the rest of the group and mightnt afford an extra £39 because someone double booked

This is fairly standard. The organiser has to pay at least the deposit. I've organised hotel rooms for DH & friend (now living abroad) for DH's school reunion every year-they all went to a rather posh boarding school. Over the years it's extended to now (this year) I've organised 7 rooms as additional friends see where we staying, see how much nicer it is than the Travelodge/Premier (same cost) & how much fun we have in the evenings over a couple of drinks after the 'official' events have finished.

I won't be doing it again as now I'm organising (& paying deposit for 7 rooms) I've had friends saying 'Oh wife can only make it for Friday & Saturday, so can you cancel Sunday?' Another didn't realise that DH, me & another friend were also staying Sunday & wanted to add them & wife for Sunday as well as Friday & Saturday. Luckily the hotel have been very patient with me - so far.

You paid for everyone in November and still haven’t asked them to pay up before now?! Big mistake 🤦🏻‍♀️ Always, always send people your bank details/payment link and amount expected immediately when you book something. And “please can everyone do a bank transfer by Friday, as I’m a bit strapped this month.” If people have not committed financially, you will ALWAYS have someone flaking out which is exactly what has happened.

I don’t think you should ask the others what they want to do in a group chat. That puts people in a very awkward position where they might be really unhappy at having to pay more but don’t want to be the one to say no.

This is really for you and the friend involved to sort out. They said they were going so they should pay the full amount. Why should everyone else now pay extra and the flaky pair get off scot-free, with no consequences for a late cancellation? If I was one of the other participants being asked to subsidise that, I’d be fuming.

I went to a wedding last year where a group of 6 of us booked an AirBnB for 2 nights, but I decided a fortnight before I only wanted to go down on the morning of the wedding and stay for 1 night, not both. It wouldn’t even have occurred to me to make the others absorb the cost and I paid my full share for the 2 nights. Cannot bear selfish, tight people who would do anything different.

Most of the time the single people share a twin anyway.

I'd put a group message saying x can no longer come. The cost is the same and I've paid it all and can't get a refund so what would everyone prefer to happen, x still pays for their place or we all pay £y more to cover the £z x would have paid?

So you've spread the costs out and the couples are paying more to subsidise the singles having their own rooms?

I would do this too

Hang on, so single people paying for a room paid half what a couple would for the same room? Or was the costs split per room? Are the single rooms much smaller or lacking some amenities? I’ve paid for things up front before but always with the knowledge of when payment will be made and with friends I know won’t pull out!

It wouldn't surprise me if some more people drop out......

If it’s too late to cancel or amend the numbers everyone that drops out still needs to pay. I'd put a copy of the receipt and the booking T&C's on the group chat and ask everyone to pay up immediately before they spend their wages on something else.

Dropping out person owes you the money, not the group of people who are going. I had this with a planned group away thing. Flights only booked and paid for by one person. We’d have been sorting our own accommodation. I paid my bit, but was asked to pay more to cover someone dropping out. Fuck off! I ended up just saying I wasn’t going. Paid my bit. Why should I foot the bill for others? It’s up to the person who’s owed to chase it up from the ower! Think in the end out of an original group of 10 only 2 went! The original payer.

What are the costs for, if it is for a big shared house then I think it is more ok to share the costs.
If it a hotel room then they should pay it.
Did you specify to the group that there are non refundable costs if they agree to going and that you were paying upfront?

I'd put it out to the group. "Sorry you can't come friend, I'm not sure what you want to do, are you still covering your share as it's been paid already and is non refundable otherwise it'll be an extra X per person to cover. Let me know what you all think" kind of message.

You were bonkers to organise such a thing and pay for it out of your own pocket. This is the sort of thing you organise for husbands not boyfriends.
You’ll either have to pay the difference yourself or ask the drop out to pay. You can’t ask people for more money

“Hi x, that’s so sad about your DP not being able to come and double booking himself. Unfortunately money is quite tight and I can’t be out of pocket so you will still have to pay for both amounts. As it’s pay day weekend do you think you could send over money by Sunday? Thank you!”

I wouldn't be happy having to pay for drop outs, they should be paying

Agree with this.

Person dropping out must pay - they agreed so you booked, and they are the ones not going

You can’t ask each couple for another £80 when you’ve already told them how much it cost - for some of them that might make it unaffordable and they’ve budgeted based on what you’ve told them. If they pull out then that’s more on you.

you need to tell the person who has dropped out that they still need to pay for the room.

Oh Op! I’ve done this before, now I always always ask for the money upfront.

Morally the couple should still pay for both of their share, it’s not your fault so you shouldn’t lose money.

I would just message friend and say I’ve paid for everyone so I’ve paid 2 x for you so unfortunately you will still have to pay as I can’t afford to be out of pocket

Very Silly to pay for everyone when almost always someone does this or something comes up. How you do it is send everyone a link / pay over money to you then you book. I would put it on the group for everyone to see and decide - as X is no longer coming please confirm if you would like to pay or happy for everyone to have an additional amount added and leave it at that. Someone is bound to make a noise and then it will be up to them to resolve.

I will be amazed if you get the money back and they all go .
Common sense dictates you get money up front
Otherwise people drop out nearer the time