9 year old bullied for 'moustache'

Glad you ordered the bleach. My mum was fully supportive of me bleaching my facial hair as a child and I'm so glad she was.

As someone above has suggested, the Flawless hair removal is amazing my daughter also has hair on her upper lip and a bit of a monobrow and we use that probably once a month and it literally takes seconds to get rid of it all. I bleached my upper lip hair when I was around 10 and it was just a nightmare but that was in the 90s and there wasn't much else to use!

I wouldn't be so sure that there isn't lip hair visible. Girls with pale skin and dark hair are always going to have more visible facial hair (and leg and arm hair) than those who are lighter in complexion or with lighter hair.

There is nothing wrong with removing the hair if remarks are not something the girl wants to deal with. This isn't condoning the remarks or saying the teasing classmates have a point. There are no medals handed out to children made to feel they should die on any specific hills that adults might consider important.

Get her one of these. I'm using mine for 15 years and it's still perfect (mine is Epicare brand but they don't seem to be available anymore). No batteries, virtually painless, no harsh chemicals or danger of cutting yourself. Takes a minute or 2 to do every week or so. Genuinely one of the best things I've ever bought!

You can get similar on Aliexpress very cheaply, but I find the cheap ones are pretty useless and the spring isn't good enough.

Hmm. I can assure you that at 9yo my DD very definitely had a very noticeable moustache. I would too if I let it grow. I can’t help but think that some of the posters here minimising facial hair may actually have very little themselves and don’t get it? We are all different.
I didn’t mention to my daughter until she herself noticed, then I casually mentioned we could remove it if she wanted. We’ve done the same with armpit hair.

I am a die hard feminist but I don’t enjoy going round with a full on tache, it doesn’t make me feel good about myself.

Please don’t make her wait OP - obviously don’t force her into hair removal if she doesn’t want to, but please give her the option right away. Honestly if you use the flawless touch it is so gentle and no big deal.
It doesn’t mean the bullies have won but it will help her confidence. By all means speak to the teacher about her being teased about her appearance but I wouldn’t get specific.

If you’re set on doing something about the moustache, I’d suggest using a microplaning/eyebrow razor. I wouldn’t want to use chemical hair remover or bleach on such a young child.

But really, she’s 9. She doesn’t have a moustache. She (in common with every other kid in her class) just doesn’t have an entirely hairless face.

They’re just looking for something, anything to taunt her about… If it wasn’t the mythical moustache it would be something else. Your wee girl is perfect. Don’t let bullies convince her otherwise.

Please don't wait to help her with removal. I understand the urge not to 'bend to the bullies' but as someone who endured this problem, I was desperate to sort it out. It was torture. I still resent my mother's inaction to be honest.

She didn't help me shave my legs either, I got taunted for that and then cut my skin to ribbons when I tried to sort it myself.

These waxing strips are amazing. I bought them in desperation during lockdown because I couldn’t go to a salon, and they work far better than I imagined. When my brunette, olive skinned DD was 11 she was teased about her eyebrows, and I took her to get them shaped. In an ideal world she would have told the girl to sod off, but in the real world, she was sad about it and it was an easy fix. amzn.eu/d/ct2Xl05

Kids can be awful sometimes, but I agree with pps just remove it in whatever way you think is best and work on her resilience.

People saying to remove it - but is that what she wants or is she being pressured into that being an idea because of the bullying? I think this is a great teaching moment to say that we’re all different, we all have our own little quirks about us and that’s ok. We are unique and beautiful. I wouldn’t add to the society standard talk and tell her she needs to remove it. I would tell her she’s beautiful in the skin she’s with. Only then if she does still want to remove it, you can decide to help her. But don’t let bullying guide her into changing who she is

I really don't mean this to sound as aggressive as it probably does written down but would you genuinely book a GP appointment to discuss the possibility of hair removal, before anything is even wrong?

People are finding it very difficult to get appointments for much bigger things and I'd feel embarrassed booking an appointment for this.

Or is your GP contactable for questions without needing an appointment?

Bleach can be really harsh on skin and will only bleach what's grown out at the time. She will likely just be teased for having done something to it now the kids all notice it.

Hair removal cream can be harsh as well. It's also messy.

Waxing requires a certain amount of regrowth or the wax can't stick to the hairs meaning she will have to go through cycles of letting it grow. It also stings and can damage skin of done wrong. Kids will notice in the regrowth stage because they are mean.

I'd say shave it but us and electric trimmer like an eyebrow one. You can get them for not much money. It can be done in minutes, no blades like wet shaving and it won't grow back thicker, that is a myth. I have one and use it on my nose hair and all sorts lol

Lumea isn't for under 18's.

Flawless Finish, she can do it herself and you don't have to worry about her cutting herself. No way would I start waxing or using creams on such young skin. This way she can take total responsibility for it herself and do it as and when she wants to.

My DD had the same problem at 9. Bleach and hair removal creams will be too harsh on her skin. Threading and waxing way too painful. I used mini electric razor and keep them at bay until she is old enough for a better option. She's now 12 has never had any problems again.

I’d get it waxed off. Or use a lumea if you have one.

Also, OP, your DD will probably experience noticeable hair growth on her legs as she hits pre puberty. Best to have a plan in place for thst too. Classmates can be very insecure and unkind in the tween years, but there's no need at all to go to school with a target on your back.

Encourage your DD to stick up for kids who are the target of remarks.

As the girl who had pure white skin, dark hair and an early mustache. I'd use sensitive facial wax strips. I wish my mum had for me. I needed up burning my lip trying to take her off as I was so embarrassed that kids kept pointing it out

YANBU, don't hesitate to deal with this and don't approach it as some sort of 'character builder' in her life.

Go to a good beautician and ask for advice.

I'd also make the teacher aware that there have been unkind references to her physical appearance and ask that some sort of subtle reminder be made to the group about acceptance, kindness, the choices we should make in our interactions with others, etc.

I did too. Could you get it threaded?

We had the same happen with our Dd .. got a small facial hair removing wand .. it's great . I use one too now . Yes we should stand up to bullies but hard when they've got to walk into school and face it on their own

My dd got her period at 9 and facial hair . The thing that worked best for us that had the least impact on her skin was a small battery razor . The nice bright pink ones you can get.
It was the least traumatic thing aswell for her to use.
All my dds use them now all teenagers . For odd hairs.

My mum bleached mine. I remove upper lip hair now, but bleached for years and it did make a positive difference.

Totally agree with @LavenderBlue19.

Once your daughter has become self-aware of her upper lip hair you should immediately address (especially if she has dark hair)

Although we did bleach when daughter was ~10ish it was still noticeable, but blonde. We then waxed but as others mention, it takes a toll on their skin.

I do feel guilty, even after almost 20 years, for not going the IPL route for her.

Don't minimise the effect on her @Sockmate123, it needs effective action (not shaving though!)