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AIBU?

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Original poster

AIBU to feel sad that my 10-year-old prefers coffee over our family tea time?

106 replies

LoveMyLittleOnes · 27/02/2025 03:56

Hi everyone, I could use some advice here. My little one is 10 now, and has recently taken a liking to coffee. Our family has always been more into tea, and he used to love joining us for tea time, enjoying the cuppa we made for him. Now, he makes his own coffee and doesn’t join us for tea anymore. Sometimes, I want to relive or share those tea moments with him, but he seems a bit resistan. Part of me wants to barge in and demand he join us for a proper brew, but another part’s screaming “He’s 10 going on 16 – let him live!”

Am I being a clingy wally clinging to the Tea time days? Or should I nip this flat white nonsense in the bud before he starts charging us rent for using the kettle? 😂"

OP posts:
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ThisWarmWriter · 26/06/2025 19:31

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Coffeelotsofcoffee · 27/02/2025 17:08

I was given tea and milky coffee from age 3 . 1980s.
It may be the child has adhd in which case caffeine has a calming effect .
My friends daughter likes a fancy coffee. She's 10. Nothing wrong with her she's just won a scholarship to a top private school.

Kids are being exposed to far worse things in this day and age than a cup of tea or coffee

Blubbles · 27/02/2025 17:01

Have I missed a joke or something...?

x2boys · 27/02/2025 15:14

ilovesooty · 27/02/2025 07:26

When I went to high school at 11 the school served coffee to all of us at school dinners in the winter. I could have drunk it earlier at home if I'd been inclined to. We were given tea from baby hood upwards. Still here and unharmed.

Show quote history

My sister reminded me we used to get milky coffee at primary school occasionally on a cold day ,I'm assuming it was the whole school so kids from 4/5 upwards .

ApricotLime · 27/02/2025 15:08

I didn't understand the joke about him charging you rent for using the kettle.

x2boys · 27/02/2025 15:04

PocketFluff · 27/02/2025 13:18

This post made me remember that when I was at playschool (so about 3/4 years old), I'd come home and my mum would make us both a coffee! This was the 80s though...

Ah the 80,s sometimes I used to take a little flask of milky coffee to school in the winter ( I don't, drink either now) 🙃

x2boys · 27/02/2025 15:01

Needmorelego · 27/02/2025 14:53

I am more curious about this family tea session.
Surely in most families having tea (or coffee) basically consists on one family member standing up and going "Right I'm putting kettle on....who wants one?"
😂

Very true ,and then there, s all that nonsense about how people take it, milky,builders tea ,sugar etc 🤣

Needmorelego · 27/02/2025 14:53

I am more curious about this family tea session.
Surely in most families having tea (or coffee) basically consists on one family member standing up and going "Right I'm putting kettle on....who wants one?"
😂

x2boys · 27/02/2025 14:42

Needmorelego · 27/02/2025 04:37

Don't buy coffee then.
If it's not in the house he can't drink it.
I also don't know many ten year olds that like tea either (my 16 year old will drink ice tea).

Same neither of my kids like tea or coffee ,18 year old will drink ice tea
I dont like tea or coffee either.

PocketFluff · 27/02/2025 13:18

This post made me remember that when I was at playschool (so about 3/4 years old), I'd come home and my mum would make us both a coffee! This was the 80s though...

StrongasSixpence · 27/02/2025 12:49

Is this an AI thread?

Errors · 27/02/2025 11:27

I’ve thoroughly enjoyed this thread

Trendydiscussion · 27/02/2025 11:11

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This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

Original poster
LoveMyLittleOnes · 27/02/2025 10:24

sykadelic · 27/02/2025 04:02

Im more concerned about drinking caffeine at his young age, but I understand the feeling of loss.

You could ask him to come and sit with you all, at least once in a while.

Good luck

Thanks for the advice, love. After reading through all the posts properly, I see where I went wrong. I’ll have a real chat with him about the risks (and those caffeine papers), and maybe this time it’ll convince him to give juices a go. He’s never been keen!

OP posts:
ItGhoul · 27/02/2025 08:45

I don’t know what’s more strange, the fact that you can’t cope with your child having a different hot drink to you, or the people on the thread who are soiling themselves at the notion of a 10-year-old having a cup of tea or coffee.

MikeRafone · 27/02/2025 08:32

How about you take your 10 year old to a coffee shop and sit with them get a decade coffee or whatever and you sit and chat?

why not follow there lead and do something they want to do?

Goldengirl123 · 27/02/2025 07:39

Is this a joke?

ItShouldntHappenToMeYet · 27/02/2025 07:27

tamade · 27/02/2025 07:22

This is typical better safe than sorry stuff. I bet there isn't a proven unsafe dose either, there is probably very little actual research because poisoning children with caffeine might be quite difficult to get past a University's ethics committee.

So we get flimsy wishywashy quasi scientific statements like this - only useful for posting on MN to score points

Edited
Show quote history

The voice of reason and sense!

NamelessNancy · 27/02/2025 07:27

tamade · 27/02/2025 07:22

This is typical better safe than sorry stuff. I bet there isn't a proven unsafe dose either, there is probably very little actual research because poisoning children with caffeine might be quite difficult to get past a University's ethics committee.

So we get flimsy wishywashy quasi scientific statements like this - only useful for posting on MN to score points

Edited
Show quote history

But why take any risk when the beans can be decaffeinated by soaking them in paint stripper?! (Not serious obviously, but I really wonder how people risk assess in day to day life)

ilovesooty · 27/02/2025 07:26

Katemax82 · 27/02/2025 07:08

I drank coffee at 10

Show quote history

When I went to high school at 11 the school served coffee to all of us at school dinners in the winter. I could have drunk it earlier at home if I'd been inclined to. We were given tea from baby hood upwards. Still here and unharmed.

ChicaWowWow · 27/02/2025 07:26

EffortlesslyInelegant · 27/02/2025 07:25

Goodness me. He's having a cup of coffee not a triple espresso, a couple of full strength Marlboro and a line of coke. Unclench. I promise you'll feel better for it.

I spend my days trying to tire out my kids. There is no way in hell I'd give them caffeine, that's completely nuts 😆

ItShouldntHappenToMeYet · 27/02/2025 07:26

TroysMammy · 27/02/2025 07:18

Even if it is but isn't it fun reading the responses? I love a bit of batshittery and fuckwhatery in the morning it puts me in the right frame of mind for the day ahead. Not forgetting having a lovely cup of tea at some point.

Show quote history

I liked you. I agreed with you.
And then you mentioned tea...
😀

EffortlesslyInelegant · 27/02/2025 07:25

Goodness me. He's having a cup of coffee not a triple espresso, a couple of full strength Marlboro and a line of coke. Unclench. I promise you'll feel better for it.

PandorasJam · 27/02/2025 07:25

Throw all his stuff in the front garden and change the locks.

tamade · 27/02/2025 07:22

EverybodyLovesString · 27/02/2025 06:14

From the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry: "There is no proven safe dose of caffeine for children. Product regulations are based on practices dating as far back as the 1940’s. At this time, pediatricians advise against caffeine for children under 12 and against any use of energy drinks for all children and teens. They also suggest limiting caffeine to at most 100 mg (about two 12 oz cans of cola) daily for those 12-18 years old."

https://www.aacap.org/AACAP/Families_and_Youth/Facts_for_Families/FFF-Guide/Caffeine_and_Children-131.aspx

This is typical better safe than sorry stuff. I bet there isn't a proven unsafe dose either, there is probably very little actual research because poisoning children with caffeine might be quite difficult to get past a University's ethics committee.

So we get flimsy wishywashy quasi scientific statements like this - only useful for posting on MN to score points