I did post on here previously.
So basically I had a massive argument with my MIL a few years ago when she was sending me nasty texts when I had a relative critically ill in hospital.
When I went to stay and help my family she got quite nasty and wasn't supportive at all and was sending me passive aggressive texts about me "abandoning" her son etc.
I had bit my tongue for years with her and FIL to be honest, I just exploded at her and I haven't spoken to her of FIL since.
They tried leaving £100 in a card that year at Xmas but I told DH to send it back.
Prior to this MIL would always interfere in both our relationship and general health.
From ordering me to get the Covid and Flu jab (I'm on my early 30s) to telling me "I needed to cook DH meals l" to asking "when are your visitors leaving", it was always something.
I have been very good to in-laws prior to this, helping them with chores, writing letters, gardening, dog sitting for weeks, doing their shopping etc and I never got any appreciation for it.
The picture that was painted to me by DH when we first got together was that they were these lonely people who were kind and nice people and the reason the oldest sibling didn't bother with them was because of his wife.
Was all a pack of lies as I found out for myself .
FIL has made racial slurs against my Polish BIL who is married to my sister on multiple occasions and uses the p and n word a lot.
He is a sarcastic horrible man, he made me cry when he accused me of being lazy in lockdown (whilst I was doing his shopping).
This was the only time DH stood up to him on my behalf.
Anyway so now they have both got health problems now and need help.
DH was asked me if I would be able to make peace and start over with them.
What really bothers me is how other people that have never bothered or helped them get treated better than me.
Like the ex wife of BIL who didn't talk them the whole time she was married to the eldest son got taken out for a £300 meal after not seeing her for years and I did so much and never even got a thank you.
It just really burns me how I got treated and I can't forgive or forget.
DH is making me feel like I am being petty and to at least talk to them but I don't want to.
AIBU?