Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask for your ideas helping my ambitiously inventive/aspiring mechanic son

31 replies

babystep · 24/02/2025 21:57

10yo DS is always coming up with ambitious ideas for inventions - dynamo powered motorbikes, perpetual motion machines. He has a strong urge to create and invent - specifically mechanical, electrical type stuff, usually vehicles in some way and usually sustainably powered.

For his last birthday he asked for a "tinker set" to enable him to create stuff - very specifically he did not want a child's set but proper tools. More recently he decided he wants to build a motorbike from scratch as precursor to building this dynamo one he has got in his mind.

This is all great, except of course he doesn't remotely have the skills to do this, Nor do me or DH. And I have no idea how to help him build skills in this area which obviously interests him. This is partly because while he is very creative and ambitious in his ideas he is also very averse to any kind of kit, class, book or show which might help him learn.

When we bought him some scaled down real tools (advertised as women's tools on amazon 😂) for birthday we also got a lot of STEM kids - solar powered robtos, that kind of thing. But he never finishes them - gets fed up if one thing foes wrong or starts, gets distracted, forgets. He never even enjoyed lego when younger as disliked following instructions. Offered to get him one or two Mark Rober kits as his brother enjoys them, but he was vague and I'm loathe to keep spending money on vague.

He imagines he can just pick up some tools, open the shed and make something. Great, that's the innocence of kids, right, But then he gets upset when say "we can't just buy some parts and make a motorbike" as he clearly feels we SHOULD be able to bridge this gap with him. For example he thinks my DH must know about motorbikes because "daddy went to university, right"?

DS is bright, enjoys science at school, I'm not exactly losing sleep over all this, because I know ultimately he's ten and if he does want to be an engineer or mechanic he'll eventually work out he needs to learn it in some way that he possibly finds boring.
But would love ideas of where you actually begin to learn these kind of skills and whether I can help him in an age-appropriate way to be able to build things and develop his interests?

OP posts:
bluesatin · 24/02/2025 22:43

Meccano? Technic lego? K'nex? My son made some amazing stuff from K'nex that wasn't in the instructions.... maybe I shouldn't mention the machine gun!!!!

Original poster
babystep · 24/02/2025 22:37

DoYouReally · 24/02/2025 22:16

YouTube videos?

No matter what he wants to do in life, there will be some form of assessment. A lot of intelligent people struggle with learning because they instinctively know so much without even trying. The sooner you can effectively teach him how to learn the better.

perhaps my question is how I help him to learn something which I never learnt myself , and in a way which suits him not me?
If I have ever needed or wanted to learn something practical I love a good kit or a book of instructions. But clearly those things don't quite work for him.

OP posts:
Original poster
babystep · 24/02/2025 22:35

Buy him an old bike and let him take it apart and rebuild it. Give him any old electricals you have to dismantle and reuse the pieces (nothing dangerous obviously). Get some junk modelling stuff and let him produce some prototypes for his ideas

@NuffSaidSam I think this may be part of my challenge. I have no idea what I could give him in terms of an old electrical to dismantle and reuse. What is not dangerous?

I totally agree he needs to grasp that there is effort behind this kind of thing. I have told him that. And we could force the point by insisting he completes the kits he has begun, but we already do the 'you need effort to succeed' stuff with music practice and homework. I think he does get from music especially that the dull grind of learning can pay off with real satisfaction in your achievements

I don't feel like I want another area where I'm forcing him, I want to try and capture his interest more naturally if that makes sense?

I think the idea of giving him parts to play with is great - thats kind of what he asks for - but I don't know where to begin with it all

OP posts:
DoYouReally · 24/02/2025 22:16

YouTube videos?

No matter what he wants to do in life, there will be some form of assessment. A lot of intelligent people struggle with learning because they instinctively know so much without even trying. The sooner you can effectively teach him how to learn the better.

TwoLeftSocksWithHoles · 24/02/2025 22:14

I would get him to write to Sir James Dyson. He has an engineering school and may have some positive suggestions and be interested in nurturing him.

NuffSaidSam · 24/02/2025 22:07

he is also very averse to any kind of kit, class, book or show which might help him learn

I think you'll struggle as long as he keeps up with this attitude. At ten, though, he is old enough to hear the truth i.e. if you want to be able to do this stuff you have to put some effort in.

If you have a friend of a friend who's a mechanic or a friendly local garage owner you could take him down to ask some questions and they can explain how they learnt to do these things. You could also look at the Little People, Big Dreams series of books to understand the background of people who create these sorts of things.

In the meantime, get him some Lego (maybe the technic stuff), but not a set and let him build from his imagination. Buy him an old bike and let him take it apart and rebuild it. Give him any old electricals you have to dismantle and reuse the pieces (nothing dangerous obviously). Get some junk modelling stuff and let him produce some prototypes for his ideas.