Party, child with visible difference

I would reply with just the link to this thread. And then block her.

Op this woman is going to be in your child’s life for a long while yet, and whilst it would be helpful to rip into her - it’s not wise at all. Best to take note of her behaviour - keep her at arms length and make damn sure your child has nothing to do with them.

You do not want people like this in your life.

Please also send her a link to this thread. This vile excuse for a human needs to understand that her reaction is in no way, shape or form acceptable or normal.

I can see why you feel like that, but please give her a chance if she asked politely.

I’m 20 years in and I do appreciate people discretely and politely asking how to approach.

i did respond like you did when she was younger.

If we are used to something, we forget how it feels not know. The children were probably not afraid of the child himself. They may have expressed concern to their mother whether the child’s difference is painful, how they got it, whether it will get better or worse, whether they might catch it. These are innocent questions children ask. I would appreciate someone asking for correct information to give about my child and also guidance about if it is ok to talk to the child directly about the condition.

😂 yes definitely add that on!

This, but added 'would have appreciated a heads up you're a despicable cunt, then I'd have known to avoid you'.

Do not sympathise with her. She is playing a really nasty game, better to make it sound like an education ‘gap’ and be bloody condescending and embarrass her for her ignorance.

Awful, tell her how poor her parenting is and then don't speak again!

OP remind her that the Equality Act 2010 demands that disability is not discriminated against - which she is clearly doing by contacting you like this. The cousin has as much right to be at the party as anyone else and there is no need for a ‘heads up’ about their appearance. All she has to do is explain that some people look different than others because of a health condition or accident or whatever. Once it’s explained to them kids just get on with it, and in my experience are much more accepting of difference than adults. I think this is more her problem. Shut it down and refer her to the law.

No this one.

woman is an utter horror and a cunt.

Very tempting to message back saying you would have appreciated a heads up about an ignorant twat attending your daughters birthday party...

But genuinely I would send the links suggested so the woman gets a chance to rectify her ignorant and offensive attitude.

That's horrible i would write an easy to educate her while angry but don't send it right away. Allow time to calm down and reword before sending as she does need educating. The mother that is rather than her child.

That’s actually a disgraceful message!! I’d respond along these lines

‘You want me to help you deal with it? I’m not sure I can help as I’ve always taught my children to be kind and show compassion. Whilst you work on that I’ll spare you hassle of any further invites’!

I've read a lot of batshit school mum posts on this site, this is by far the worst one. How dare this cunt of a woman suggest that your lovely niece needs a warning because of her appearance? What a horrible person she is. If her DC are genuinely scared of disability then that's her own fault. I can't for a second imagine what would make a grown woman send a text like that about a little girl at her cousin's party.

Imagine requesting this with any other physical difference. She's a fucking horrible person and I'm sorry that your lovely niece has to walk the same earth as people like her.

WOW!! The cuntiness of some people never fails to surprise me. Give her both barrels and then go and get another gun OP! What an absolute cockwomble she is!

I think this is a really good reply.

Just picking my jaw up off the floor at this one. This might be one of the most outrageous messages I’ve seen on here.

Umm, I think I’d drag her further into the gutter tbh. I’d reply, ‘oh gosh, why was she scared of dear cousin? She seemed fine at the party’

Kinda gives off caring vibes whilst dragging her down lower.

Wow. I didn't expect this kind of thing would happen in this day and age. I wouldn't know how to respond to that, it's shocking.

This is a her issue, nothing to do with the child. She is a bully and I would give them a very wide berth. Her child stands no chance and is likely to turn out to be a bully in time.

This comes from the parents. Children are usually accepting of those with differences, in my experience.
What an awful woman. Even if this did happen, keep it to yourself!

This is great!

‘I am so sorry your child has anxiety around difference, please speak to the school I am sure they can help. Click on this link for support
https://myface.org/wp-content/uploads/2014/08/Parenting-Guide.pdf

We loved the fact x could come to the party and is much loved by all of the children, I am glad you are addressing your child’s issues, as they can be very harmful. Best wishes op’

I’d also leave this a while as it so incendiary that it’s hard to think straight.
maybe a response saying something along the lines of ‘it’s worrying you think that texting me this is in any way acceptable. Our job as parents is to equip our children to understand differences between people and have conversations with them when they need help and/or have questions. The fact that you don’t know how to have those conversations is a failure on your part. You need to take time to educate yourself so that you don’t continue to let your children down. Please seek help for this. I would recommend these two resources as a start…
Like I said, it is very worrying you felt it was ok to text me this. I really hope you can learn from this and never make this mistake again and offend anyone else. And obviously to help equip your children to navigate and enjoy the world.’

or something.

I'd tell her it's too late for advice she's already failed as a mother