So disappointed how life turned out for me and how to find hope

And the fact the LAs play dirty, act in underhand ways, lie &/or act unlawfully is exactly why knowing the law is helpful, not ‘useless’. Knowledge is power.

It is not pedantic to point out what I have. Most appeals are upheld. However, some parents who have lost, lose cases they could have won because they misunderstand the process and rely too heavily on parental opinion rather than referencing evidence and relying on evidence.

Again, I haven’t denied LAs play dirty, act in underhand ways, lie &/or act unlawfully. They do. Often.

Pedantic aren’t you, I’m sure OP valuing your experience and pedantry.

My opinion continues to be …. Be aware that LEA, SW & their cohorts are mainly concerned with doing as little as possible for children in need of EHCP. They are not working for your child. They’re working for their paycheck. They will fight dirty.

I haven’t asked you any questions! Bizarre you think I have.

Yes, parents get the opportunity to speak and present their case, but it isn’t enough for parents to just present their opinion. Cases are decided on evidence, not parental opinion. Presenting your case is not just about giving your parental opinion.

There are times in a tribunal, when a parent is asked to speak.
Then council, say, a social worker, who has turned up at tribunal never having met your child says you are wrong about child’s needs being typical of their genetic diagnosis. You have had child since birth, know quite a bit about the diagnosis.
SW disagrees. Never having met. Their opinion has more weight.

Any more questions? Jeez.

If you had professional evidence, it wasn’t parental opinion, which is what you stated in your pp.

LAs lying, using underhand tactics and having representation doesn’t mean it isn’t worth appealing or knowing the law though. It is. Despite LAs lying, using underhand tactics and spending extortionate sums of money on representation (often against unrepresented parents) they lose the vast, vast majority of cases.

Didn’t I mention the expert witnesses we brought … Ed Psych, Social Worker and person from preferred school ? The LEA said … thief one crappy school meets the needs….
They presented new info on the day, not in the bundle which is “not allowed”
The were well schooled in being underhanded lying sacks of scum. They spend buckets on legal advice on how to effectively ruin on case on the day. Which is why the appeal which you know, costs more money.

@Geekers I didn’t deny LAs lie. Of course they do. Often. SENDIST considers evidence. It isn’t enough for parents to just present their opinion. That is where cases fall down. This is why, if you appeal, you should consider if you need independent medico-legal assessments. Representation can only work with the evidence available, which is why representations shouldn’t be at the expense of professional assessments.

We employed a well known SEN lawyer for 2 tribunals and an appeal. The lawyer will tell you … LEA, CSC, can be 100% dishonest. The panel will always accept the “professionals” opinion over a parent’s.

It was several weeks the last time I knew.

@Geneticsbunny unless you know what you are doing, you shouldn’t attempt to write one yourself. I wouldn’t recommend relying on chatgpt either.

Even if you know what you are doing, some LAs are more likely to take little notice because they know if they ignore it, you still have to find someone with a legal aid contract to then take on the case.

@Outchy you are looking at nearly £1k to well over £1k for a pre-action letter. SOSSEN can help with a pre-action letter free of charge but the pay off is the wait.

Ipsea, charities, legal advice are useless if your LEA, School and social care are all liars working hard to “save” money by denying support for those in need.

This really isn’t the case. LAs lie and act unlawfully all the time. That isn’t unique to Somerset. But parents can force LAs to act via legal means, so knowing your/your child’s rights and how to advocate for them helps. Sadly, DC whose parents know the law and can advocate for them get better support. It shouldn’t be that way, but isn’t going to change in the foreseeable future.

My council (Somerset) faught EHCP with lies, deceit and attacks in my parenting the school and council conjuring up “incidents”.

For example: CAMHS advice to remain calm and neutral expression in responding to certain situations. School said “mum doesn’t show warmth and is expressionless when child is upset and recommends functional parenting class”. Then used the functional parenting as a “hurdle” so I couldn’t get respite til I did the class and made this reason for SEN despite genetic diagnosis … but the class was never even available in Somerset.
These deceitful behaviors by school and council went on for years - lying sacks of manure the lot of them. No idea what they think their jobs are but convinced they get raises for denying EHCP & needs.

At one point, a lead social worker was in the Caribbean- she was on a work from home contract. How effective could she be? Never even “seeing” her clients interact. Just her dumb face on a tiny phone screen.
Ipsea, charities, legal advice are useless if your LEA, School and social care are all liars working hard to “save” money by denying support for those in need.

There’s a special place in hell for them.

You might get lucky. I only had the send the ipsea letter and the council responded..

@StrivingForSleep thanks for clarifying. I assume you have a legal background? Is there any way to write a pre action letter yourself? I understand they are somewhat of a formality in terms of what they say and there is a structure of how to construct one. I.e they are not to difficult to write? Maybe chatgpt could be used to craft something basic?

Are you aware that being married makes all money 50% legally yours? Your husband not giving it to you is financial abuse (illegal), and entrapment.

Take him to court, get financial aide etc get yourself help and take what is yours! There is also help when the LA can take your children, or pay for them go on daytrips so you can have a break. Look into what your LA will fund and do something about your husband and the money situation.

@Geneticsbunny IPSEA’s model letter is not a formal pre-action letter.

If IPSEA’s model letter doesn’t work and then a pre-action letter doesn’t work, legal aid would cover judicial review proceedings themselves because they will be brought in DS’s name. But legal aid won’t cover the pre-action letter because that is done in the parent’s name and it doesn’t sound like OP would qualify. There’s a wait, but SOSSEN can help with a pre-action letter FOC.

@Spanglemum02 not all disabled teens in full-time education are entitled to UC in their own right. LCW/LCWRA has to be established prior to the start of the course (which is where making a Credits Only New Stle ESA claim comes in). Contact’s resources I linked to earlier in the thread explain more.

You are in a financially abusive situation. I don't understand why your oldest child can't get UC? Your younger child will be able get GCSE or equivalents. I think you do need to keep hassling thr LA. Could he be classed as EOTAS and have tutors?

@Outchy the ipsea letter is an official pre action letter. You are staying that they are in breach of their legal requirements and that you will be taking legal advice of they don't sort it out asap. Legal representation should be free because it is for your son and he should qualify for legal.aid.

This is financial abuse which is domestic abuse.

Women's aid could give you advice.

You'd probably be better off splitting and renting & calming uc on your own with the DCs. Do the calculations at entitledto.com

Don't do any wifework for DH until money is 50/50.

He knows he'll be worse off if you split as he'll have to give you 50% of the house value. What will that buy him, a studio and no one to do his laundry.?

He doesnt deserve a family.

@TheGirlattheBack the OP can’t appeal to SENDIST at the moment. She doesn’t yet have the right of appeal. In order to get the right of appeal, she needs to force the LA to finalise, via JR if necessary.

It isn’t 30 days the LA has to finalise following a tribunal Order either. The timescales differ depending on the type of appeal. They can be found in regulation 44 of the SEND Regs 2014.

Much love to you, OP, for persevering and holding everything together for your children in such disheartening circumstances.

Something to note is that with 2 disabled/ SN children in your care, in my exoerience you can claim 70% of the value of the family home rather than 50%.

You will have more peace and control without your husband since he is clearly unwilling to step up to the plate financially or with care. 50:50 with one but not the other … hmmm….

Please consider speaking to Women's Aid or an independent solicitor (many will offer free consultations).

Your husbands take home on an annual salary of £45k is around £2,900 a month. Where is that money going? Financially (and mentally) it sounds like you'd be much better separating and taking your portion of the property and any savings.

And I am assuming they are his kids simply because the likelihood of such a selfish arsehole choosing to enter into a relationship with a woman who already has a disabled child and no job (i.e. who won't be improving HIS situation any) is close to zero.