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Original poster

To think that not everyone spends 90% of their time worrying that people will die?

39 replies

Sanch1 · 22/02/2025 23:08

Me and my DH are having a bit of a deep and meaningful. He says that he spends 90% of his time worrying about people dying, me, the kids, his parents etc etc. I say we just have to live our lives and not worry about that, what will be will be and we can't let the potential things in the future ruin our now?

YABU most people worry about that.

YANBU he's really anxious and needs therapy.

OP posts:
TempestTost · 22/02/2025 23:42

N, most people don't.

I do think many things in our society encourage that kind of thinking though, in people who are prone to it anyway it can become a problem.

Ultimately everyone dies, and it's important to come to terms with that in order to make good decisions about living.

Motomum23 · 22/02/2025 23:39

Funnily enough me and dh were talking about unwanted thoughts this evening and I remember from around 6 to 10 years old being absolutely paranoid every waking minute I wasn't with my mum that she was going to die. Literally every second.
It's not normal (and she's still alive 30 years later so a pointless anxiety). Perhaps get him to look at mindfulness-'eckhart tolle or alan Watts would be a good place to start there.

Sweetloveandcheese · 22/02/2025 23:38

The thought my dc could die before has crossed my mind several times.

HotCrossBunplease · 22/02/2025 23:36

Perhaps he’s not as worried as you think, but just bad at percentages?

Joking apart, yes, poor guy needs to see a professional therapist.

FoolishHips · 22/02/2025 23:34

My life revolves around trying to distract myself from this type of thought. I have GAD, OCD and Asperger's though. Since I lost my parents and one of my dogs it's even more difficult to feel carefree.

Hollyhedge · 22/02/2025 23:17

It’s not uncommon to worry about this. 90% is a lot though.

CharlotteLightandDark · 22/02/2025 23:14

I have fleeting thoughts of this but I’m pretty good at unhooking from them and they don’t influence my behaviours or anything.

people with GAD worry a lot about stuff like this and other stuff. It’s no way to live and completely futile

Gowlett · 22/02/2025 23:12

Some people are naturally anxious. Or have anxiety.
Worrying about family dying would be a part of that.

As a person who doesn’t think that way, it’s strange.
My cousin couldn’t believe that I don’t feel anxious…

Stardust286 · 22/02/2025 23:12

Do they not? I think this but mainly at night, anxiety is always worse at night. Even worse when I'm due on. Anxiety is bloody horrible

steff13 · 22/02/2025 23:11

He needs therapy and/or medication. That's an unhealthy level of anxiety. Poor guy, that most be awful to live with.

verycloakanddaggers · 22/02/2025 23:10

It's normal to have passing thoughts or periods of worry if something happens, but not to worry all or most of the time.

Has he felt this way for long?

Mandylovescandy · 22/02/2025 23:10

I have this kind of anxiety about the DC but even I wouldn't say it is 90% of the time. That seems an awful lot and think he needs help

Clairey1986 · 22/02/2025 23:09

Bless him, he defo needs some support. Anxiety is horrendous.

OrangeYaGlad · 22/02/2025 23:08

He needs help.