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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not want to look like a bag lady?

38 replies

Crazybaby123 · 22/02/2025 10:38

I put on weight after my second child and went from a size 8 to 10 to a 14 to 16. It's been 6 years and this weight is not going anywhere.

The problem is I have no idea how to dress for my current size. I live in leggings and refused to buy new clothes as always thought I would lose the weight. But now have to conceded that it is not going anywhere.

I want to look smart and well turned out as fashion and clothes used to be something I really enjoyed. Now, it's stretch jeans or leggings and the cheapest baggy top thrown on. I still wear maternity tops.

Please post some fashion ideas, websites and tips for looking glam when you are not the size of the models in the pictures
Thanks

Yabu- just wear the leggings, your glam is gone now. There is no hope for you.

Yanbu- there is plenty of glam fashion for a 40 something mum who is larger than she was.

OP posts:
Original poster
Crazybaby123 · 22/02/2025 11:24

Imtoooldforallthis · 22/02/2025 11:23

I'm a 14 bottom and 16 top, I've just bought these from m and s and there really nice, I bought an extra short as I'm 5'2 and they are a lovely cropped length , look great with boots or shoes. Currently wearing with a sleeveless jumper from Zara.

www.marksandspencer.com/wide-leg-trousers/p/clp60506507?color=BLACK#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r3c2%7Cprodflag_plp_ts_QP_100+

Oh love those. I hate tight trousers round my waste and these look comfy and glam at the same time. Will actually buy a pair today :)

OP posts:
Genevieva · 22/02/2025 11:24

There are definitely clothes that look good on a fuller figure. Some even look better. Buy some nice outfits that fit you and your lifestyle now. If you lose weight you can return to your old wardrobe or buy something new then. It’s no good feeling lie about your appearance. It won’t help you get in shape.

WhatWouldTheDoctorDo · 22/02/2025 11:23

Try annacascarina and Erica Davies on instagram for some inspiration.

PonyPatter44 · 22/02/2025 11:23

I'm size 16 and I don't look like a bag lady! Do you genuinely think that every larger woman you see looks like a bag of shite?

Get a bra that fits you well, and you will see that your shape and the way clothes hang on you will improve.

Imtoooldforallthis · 22/02/2025 11:23

I'm a 14 bottom and 16 top, I've just bought these from m and s and there really nice, I bought an extra short as I'm 5'2 and they are a lovely cropped length , look great with boots or shoes. Currently wearing with a sleeveless jumper from Zara.

www.marksandspencer.com/wide-leg-trousers/p/clp60506507?color=BLACK#intid=pid_pg1pip48g2r3c2%7Cprodflag_plp_ts_QP_100+

Original poster
Crazybaby123 · 22/02/2025 11:22

GoldMoon · 22/02/2025 10:51

Start with a good haircut , buy some skincare & make up and experiment with that til you get a look you like.

Start taking care of your nails by buffing them and nail oil for a few weeks and then move into a few nail polishes.
Look around your favourite shops , maybe looking at ideas of how they've put outfits together .

Think of colours you like and those that would suit you.
Being ' glam ' all the time is quite time consuming , think more of looking put together & trendy ( If that's what you want ) or maybe timeless chic etc.

Start by buying a few items and seeing how you get on , think about accessories - jewellery , scarfs , great shoes / boots.
Add to that look and expand by getting a new coat / jacket with will compliment your new look.

Have fun experimenting , think about a personal shopper if you need more ideas or a trusted friend .

Oh theae are really good tips actuallym my nails are currently short and hair just gets pulled back and I havent worn jewellry for year. I really like the idea of accessorising to bring back some fun into my wardrobe. I have two boys and have spent years just wearing whetver I dont mind getting muddy so this could be a way to have fun and shop without a full wardrobe revamp.

OP posts:
Original poster
Crazybaby123 · 22/02/2025 11:19

Sosoweary · 22/02/2025 10:53

I understand that you are not happy with your current weight OP but I do feel the underlying premise of your post is that us women who are size 14 - 16 are somehow inferior to slimmer women.

Considering I believe size 16 is still the average dress size for women in the UK you must see many many women of that size in your everyday life. Do they all look like " bag ladies" ? Surely you must see some women everyday who are size 14 - 16 , or , shock horror, even larger who manage to dress stylishly and who you can take inspirationfrom?

Edited

No it's not that, I know what you are trying to say but its not that. Its that I know what to buy for a smaller size but just don't know what to buy for my current size that will look smart and glamourous. I get the shapes wrong and the cuts. Im sick of wearing leggings and a t shirt and don't know where to shop.

OP posts:
Zempy · 22/02/2025 11:18

Report your own post and ask for it to be moved to Style and Beauty. They are brilliant for this kind of advice.

Or Mounjaro.

Original poster
Crazybaby123 · 22/02/2025 11:16

FanofLeaves · 22/02/2025 10:46

What do you like? What would you like to be wearing?

I sort of find her a bit annoying, but I can’t deny this Instagrammer does look really good in what she wears and might give you a few ideas.

search Hannah_Briggs

I like the long coats that are out but I can't find any that would look good on my size. Dresses I really like but struggle with shape that doesnt look frumpy or like a sack! Will check this lady out thank you :)

OP posts:
Sosoweary · 22/02/2025 10:53

I understand that you are not happy with your current weight OP but I do feel the underlying premise of your post is that us women who are size 14 - 16 are somehow inferior to slimmer women.

Considering I believe size 16 is still the average dress size for women in the UK you must see many many women of that size in your everyday life. Do they all look like " bag ladies" ? Surely you must see some women everyday who are size 14 - 16 , or , shock horror, even larger who manage to dress stylishly and who you can take inspirationfrom?

NeverDropYourMooncup · 22/02/2025 10:51

There's a style and beauty board.

Other than that, buy some dresses, put them on, go about your day generally covers how you start to wear something other than leggings and a t-shirt.

GoldMoon · 22/02/2025 10:51

Start with a good haircut , buy some skincare & make up and experiment with that til you get a look you like.

Start taking care of your nails by buffing them and nail oil for a few weeks and then move into a few nail polishes.
Look around your favourite shops , maybe looking at ideas of how they've put outfits together .

Think of colours you like and those that would suit you.
Being ' glam ' all the time is quite time consuming , think more of looking put together & trendy ( If that's what you want ) or maybe timeless chic etc.

Start by buying a few items and seeing how you get on , think about accessories - jewellery , scarfs , great shoes / boots.
Add to that look and expand by getting a new coat / jacket with will compliment your new look.

Have fun experimenting , think about a personal shopper if you need more ideas or a trusted friend .

FanofLeaves · 22/02/2025 10:46

What do you like? What would you like to be wearing?

I sort of find her a bit annoying, but I can’t deny this Instagrammer does look really good in what she wears and might give you a few ideas.

search Hannah_Briggs

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