Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To have told him 30 mins late to pick me up pissed me off?

130 replies

Ohsoitsokkkk · 21/02/2025 23:46

Boyfriend usually picks me up after work as I moved closer to him and moved in so my my commute is very long, he’s never had an issue of doing this and he’s said multiple times don’t pay for taxis I will get you. He usually does it about twice a week, it’s less than a ten minute drive to my work.

The thing is, he is always late - I can think of at least 4 times this year he has been late. There’s always some issue like traffic jams or his mum rang him etc etc. I have put it down to bad time management and tried to get over it.

Today I asked him to get me at 5pm. He is a teacher so off work this week. He said he would, and that he was going to see his friend who lives close to where I work so would be there on time. I rang him at 5 to 5 saying I had been to the pharmacy and could he pick me up from there instead (a 5 min drive from his friend). He said yes no problem see you soon. It got to 5-15 and I was feeling a little irked but tried to just let it go. At 5-20 he rang me and said “so sorry, I left my phone at my friends so had to drive back and get it and then there was a traffic jam. I’ll be 5 minutes”

He arrived 15 minutes later. I said I was pissed off that he was late and the traffic wasn’t that bad. He said “so you think I left you there intentionally”. I just said yes. He said “fuck this” and sped down the road nearly crashing into another car with me in with him, I told him to slow down.

He said he was doing me a favour and I should be grateful he picked me up. He’s not spoken to me all evening.

I do a lot for him, I pay most bills and lend him quite a bit of money when he needs. I make more than him and buy us nice stuff. I cook every meal.

Aibu?

OP posts:
ManchesterGirl2 · 21/02/2025 23:55

For me the speeding would be the worst part of this. I'm fairly relaxed about disorganisation, but not about adults who can't control their temper.

CluelessAboutBiology · 21/02/2025 23:54

Out of nosiness, if he picks you up 2 days a week, how do you get home the rest of the week? If you had taken the “other” transport, would it have been quicker than waiting for him if you’d known he would be 35 mins late?

More importantly, if you pay most bills, how come you often have to lend him large sums of money? How much money does he borrow? Has he always paid you back?

Katemax82 · 21/02/2025 23:51

Tell him to get you half an hour before you actually need him to

TheSandgroper · 21/02/2025 23:51

Well, you might possibly be U in staying with him. He has his life improve nicely but shows little sign of reciprocating.

You can do better elsewhere.

Knittedfairies2 · 21/02/2025 23:50

Stop doing so much for him, and stop subsidising him. Actions have consequences, but in the great scheme of things a quarter of an hour late isn't too bad, half an hour is pushing it.

Swipe left for the next trending thread